All Revitalizer Cloths

All Revitalizer Cloths

Last night was the first and only time I really wanted soooo badly to be around smokers to inhale second-hand smoke.

It all started when I was asked by a friend if I wanted to go to the finals of an ultimate bartending competition at this place.

At first, I wasn’t interested because I have this fear of situations where there is a pretty good possibility of getting hit square in the face by a glass bottle. However, after thinking about it for a moment, I realized that it would be a great opportunity to see if these All Revitalizer Cloths can refresh my clothes after being around smokers.

Editor’s Note: Going to the bartending competition was also the reason why this review was a little late today.

The purpose of the All Revitalizer Cloths is to refresh the clothes you’ve only worn for a few of hours and don’t want to wash because you’ve only worn them for a few of hours. In other words, it’s for those clothes that you want to wear recycle.

Okay, subjecting my clothes to cigarette smoke was an extreme scenario, but it did give me a good reason to get out of the apartment and become a social butterfly, instead of an antisocial cocoon.

So I decided to go to the competition, but when my friend and I got there at 10:30pm, the place was kind of empty. The competition didn’t start until 11pm and for the first hour there were no smokers around me. This greatly disappointed me.

However, suddenly this beautiful, busty brunette with a lit cigarette in between her fingers approached me. When I looked at her, she pointed at me for some reason. Then she did it again.

Was she flirting with me?

She came closer and with her free hand, she placed it on my shoulder.

I thought to myself, “Damn, I’m hott! This woman is totally flirting with me.”

Then she removed her hand, grabbed the ashtray that was behind me, and then turned around.

I’m soooo NOT hott.

Well at least I had an opportunity to be around second-hand smoke.

Eventually the place got a bit more crowded and a couple more smokers moved into the area where I was being soooo NOT hott.

At about 2:30am, my friend and I left the club. When I got home, I stripped off my clothes and stuck it in the dryer with one of the moist All Revitalizer Cloths.

Twenty minutes later, I pulled my clothes out and took a whiff. Overall it does a decent job in refreshing my clothing. My shirt had a light citrus scent, but I also could still smell a hint of cigarette smoke. The pants I wore also had a light citrus scent, but I couldn’t smell any hint of smoke. As for my underwear, it didn’t matter because I didn’t wear any.

So while hanging up my clothes, I wondered about other situations where the All Revitalizer Cloths would come in handy.

I could only think of one group of people who these would also come in handy for: People having affairs.

Think about it. If you’re having a wild sex romp in the back seat of your car, some of the cologne/perfume the other person is wearing will probably rub onto you and your clothing. The scent that rubs onto you is easy to hide, but the scent that rubs onto your clothing isn’t.

You could just wash the clothes, but that might make your significant other suspicious, since they might be wondering why you’re doing laundry in the middle of dinner. Or you could burn the clothes, but buying new clothes every other day can get pretty expensive.

So I think the All Revitalizer Cloths is a discreet and inexpensive way to hide your affairs.


Item: All Revitalizer Cloths
Purchase Price: $3.99
Rating: 3 out of 5
Pros: Nice light scent. Easy to use. Discreet and inexpensive way to hide affairs.
Cons: Can’t use with large loads of clothes, seven items max. Mixed results.
Standing naked in front of a dryer waiting for clothes is soooo NOT hott.

15 thoughts to “All Revitalizer Cloths”

  1. I may have to try these. I have a sister who lives 2 hours away. She’s a smoker. My other sister and I (non-smokers) travel to see her at least once a month for a “sister weekend”. No matter what I pack or what I wear ends up smelling like cigarettes. I usually end up putting them in the dryer with a fabric softener to “freshen” them, but I’ll have to try this to see if it works. Even my pillow has to be “de-smoked”! I can’t believe I used to live with my parents who both smoked all of their lives. Did I smell like that ALL the time…yuck! Thanks Marvo! Oh..and I can’t believe I’m the first commenter…this review must REALLY be late 🙂 Oh, yeah, one more thing….you’re HOTT in my book 🙂

  2. I know I smoke, and it probably is the worse smell you could have on your clothes besides the smell of fried fish. I’ll have to try these thingys.

  3. One thing though. Why the hell is everything that “cleans” citrus scented? More specifically Orange scented? Did I miss something in the transition from the 80’s where Lemons and Pinecones fell out of fashion?

  4. Aymie’s Mom – Thanks, my mom tell me I’m hott too, but she’s supposed to say that, after all she’s my mom.

    Aymie – Yes, that’s the reason why I don’t eat fish. Damn fishy smell.

    frstlymil – Then the commercial should say, “As for the lipstick on your collar, that’s your problem.”

    Jamie – I think it’s because citrus scents are more of a unisex scent. I don’t know of many dudes who would want to smell like lavender.

  5. I’ve never heard of those things, but I’ve noticed that the smoke smell in clothes will dissipate after a few days even if you don’t treat them with anything. So maybe those would work for affairs, but I’m not so sure they’re worth the money for odors like cigarette smoke.

    Wouldn’t something that sprays on be a lot less work?

  6. Webmiztris – Something like sprays might work better, but oh how I love putting on clothes that are fresh out of the dryer. Except when it’s my metal chastity belt.

  7. Grins – I think your best bet is to wash your hair or cut it all off.

    Jenny – Doesn’t EVERYONE have a metal chastity belt?

  8. This item will need a different marketing tack in California, since it is illegal to smoke in bars located in the Golden State. They’d have to really focus their efforts on the “affair” angle. And believe me: if my husband even used just the dryer, I’d be suspicious right off the bat.

  9. birdwoman – Um, probably not. Unless you want to see half-naked pictures of me posing in them. Before you answer, I just want to let you know, it’s not a pretty site.

  10. Having left my freshly cleaned laundry in the washing machine for two whole days (yes, I’m afraid it’s true), I am now wondering whether these little beauties remove musty smells, too.

  11. Mellie – I don’t know if these sheets would work, but I’d use three dryer sheets if that happened to me.

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