Sugar Free Melon AquaDrops

Melon AquaDrops

(Editor’s Note: It’s Request Week here at the Impulsive Buy. Over the past month or so, several readers have asked us to review certain products. Being the friendly quasi-product review blog that we are, we were happy to oblige. So this week we will be reviewing products that you, our readers, have suggested.

To start off Request Week, we will be reviewing a new mint called AquaDrops, which was suggested by poor graduate student lightpinksheep. Enjoy.)

In honor of the duet by Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez of the Spanish-language song “Escapemonos” they performed at the Grammy Awards, I’ve decided to do a very small part of this review in Spanish, which I have no experience with, except for what I’ve learned by reading the menu at Taco Bell and watching Sesame Street as a child.

Wait, now that I think about it, all I remember from the Taco Bell menu are taco, burrito, and Chalupa. Actually, I don’t think “Chalupa” is a real word. Also, the only Spanish lessons I can remember from Sesame Street are how to say open (abierto) and closed (cerrado) and how to count to ten (uno, dos, tres…um…).

Actually, I only remember how to count to three because U2 lead singer, Bono, has messed me up, thanks to the song “Vertigo.” At the beginning of the song, he count “uno, dos, tres” and then he jumps to thirteen or something. Ever since hearing that song, I can’t remember how to say numbers in Spanish after three.

Damn you, Bono!

Donde esta el aqua?

Holy crap! Where the hell did that come from?

Wait, that does say “Where is the water?” in Spanish, right?

Wow, I guess listening to Menudo records, not only puts me to sleep, I also apparently can learn some Spanish through osmosis.

Anyway, the question ”Donde esta el aqua?” was directed towards these new AquaDrops Hydrating “Mints.”

Oh, the “Mints” are in quotations marks because there’s not much of a minty thing going on with these. The one I bought was melon-flavored and basically that’s all you really taste.

It’s definitely not like one of those powerful sinus-clearing mints, like Altoids. Although, after I sucked on an AquaDrop for awhile, there was a little tingling sensation in my mouth, which I assumed was the minty part. If it wasn’t, I may need to see a doctor.

Despite being called AquaDrops, I didn’t notice a drop of aqua in them. I even smashed one with a hammer, but there wasn’t any liquid at all.

Anyway, these melon-flavored AquaDrops were pretty good, even though they were sugar-free and had no aqua in them.

OH, WAIT! I feel some liquid!

Oh, never mind. It’s just my saliva.

My bad.


Item: Sugar Free Melon AquaDrops
Purchase Price: 99 cents
Rating: 3 out of 5
Pros: Melon-flavor is pretty good. Like eating melon candy. Sugar free. Thank goodness my English isn’t as bad as my Spanish.
Cons: Not a drop of aqua. Not really minty. Packaging says excessive consumption may have a laxative effect. Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez duet.

7 thoughts to “Sugar Free Melon AquaDrops”

  1. good review – thanks for saving me the hassle, because (1) i needed something minty, and (2) needed some help with my spanish.

  2. Now, I wonder how they define “excessive consumption…” ‘Cause with my luck, they really mean “more than 2” and I’ll have 3, and then explode…

  3. rick – Um, it’s not really minty.

    Thumper – I was going to find out how much “excessive consumption” was, but I was afraid of when the laxative effect would kick in. You never know, I could be stuck in an elevator or traffic when it kicks in.

  4. Even the packaging isn’t appealing. Does kind of remind me of a former IT guy at my office that was addicted to Altoids and other mints. He seriously went through 2+tins a day at the office. Fresh breath but freaky guy.

  5. I tried them after a night of drinking (for hydration, ya know!) and was very perplexed about the melon and mint combination. Is it a violation of nature to mix the two flavors? My intoxicated self thought so.

  6. Webmiztris – Maybe “Excessive Consumption May Have A Laxative Effect” is the less scary way of saying “anal leakage.”

    Grins – I’m no doctor, but I seriously think he has some kind of oral fixation or obsessive-compulsive disorder or doesn’t like brushing his teeth.

    jazzchic – If Hip-Hop artist, Nelly, and Country star, Tim McGraw, can have a song together, why can’t melon and mint go with each other? I say, if hell hasn’t frozen over, it’s all right.

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