I like to think of myself as an Asian Anthony Bourdain because I like to try things from other lands and I have a penchant for profanity and sexual references.
However, due to the lack of a passport and my fear of a TSA cavity search, I haven’t traveled to other lands, but thanks to the postal system I can try items from around the world. I’ve tried pear sparkling water from the UK, cucumber-flavored soda from Japan, jalapeno SPAM spread from Mexico, soap from Ireland, and cereal from the Degobah system.
With my consumption of the the Bolletje BrÃ¶d In De Melk Chocola from the Netherlands, I can now carve out another notch in my foreign product review bedpost.
Since I didn’t understand 99 percent of the words on the box, except perhaps for “melk” and “chocola,” I assumed that this was either cereal with chocolate or mini elk with chocolate cola before I opened it. Thankfully, it was the former because the only three-letter animals I eat are cow, pig, and when I’m playing the home version of Survivor — bat.
When I found out Bolletje BrÃ¶d In De Melk Chocola contained chocolate covered pieces of cereal, I thought it was going to be the GREATEST CEREAL EVAR — replacing Count Chocula. But after several spoonfuls, it was relegated to Best Cereal I’ve Had With Dutch Words on It, which really doesn’t mean much since it’s the ONLY cereal I’ve had with Dutch words on it.
There were two types of cereal: plain and chocolate covered. The plain cereal, which significantly outnumbered the chocolate-covered ones, had a hard, lightly sweetened exterior, but the inside was like an unsalted saltine. The hard outer shell made it hard for the cereal to get soggy in melk, but if there was a crack in the shell they quickly got melk-logged. The chocolate-covered pieces had a firm, semi-sweet chocolate exterior and when eaten by themselves they were not bad. However, when the two are combined they form a bland cereal that will disappoint fat kids and overweight product review bloggers with a sweet tooth.
(Wat je moet weten – 35 grams – 130 kcal of energie, 3.5 grams of eiwitten, 27 grams of koolhydraten, 7 grams of waarvan suiker, 1.8 grams of vet, 0.5 grams of waarvan verzadigd, 2.5 grams of voedingsvezels, and 0.09 grams of natrium.)
(Editor’s Note: A big thanks to long-time TIB reader Fatyoli for sending me this product from the Netherlands.)
Item: Bolletje BrÃ¶d In De Melk Chocola
Size: 350 grams
Purchased at: Given by TIB reader Fatyoli
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Best Cereal I’ve Had With Dutch Words on It. Hard outer shell laughs in the face of melk. Chocolate-covered pieces were not bad by themselves. 3.5 grams of eiwitten.
Cons: Bland tasting. Inner cereal crumbles in the face of milk. Chocolate covered pieces weren’t as chocolatey as I hoped. TSA cavity searches.