REVIEW: Yoplait Smoothie (Triple Berry, Strawberry Banana and Strawberry Mango Pineapple)

The Yoplait Smoothie kits, or as I like to call them, Jamba Juice Action Playsets, allow normal folk, like you, me or your children, to walk and blend in the shoes of a Jamba Juice worker.

With a blender, a carton of skim milk and these Yoplait Smoothie kits, you can experience a day in the life of a Jamba Juice Jockey. Learn to yell loud enough so that patrons can hear you over the whirring and crushing of the powerful blenders, but without straining your vocal chords. Practice your blender container top throwing technique so that you can hit the sink each and every time without looking or hitting your fellow employees. Rehearse your speech to Jamba Juice virgins about the differences between the Sixteen, Original and Power sizes. Learn to hold your tongue when someone orders a Power-sized smoothie and not say, “Holy shit, do you REALLY need a Jamba Juice that big?”

Each Yoplait Smoothie package contains frozen chunks of fruit and yogurt, and it comes in three flavors: Triple Berry, Strawberry Banana and Strawberry Mango Pineapple. It doesn’t come in as many flavors as what’s found on a Jamba Juice menu board and you’re going to have to make your own boosts, but that’s as easy as crushing the pills you might have in your medicine cabinet. Crush a Flintstones tablet for a Daily Vitamin Boost, do the same to a No-Doze for an Energy Boost, or a birth control pill if you want to include the discontinued Femme Boost.

Making a Yoplait Smoothie is as simple as getting rid of your illegal drugs by flushing it down the toilet when the cops bust down your door. Just throw everything in there and watch it spin. After a minute or so in the blender, the cup of skim milk and the entire bag of frozen chunks of fruit and yogurt will turn into 16 ounces of smoothie goodness. Although, I must admit it wasn’t entirely smooth since my crappy $30 blender had trouble breaking down the frozen fruits entirely, so there were small bits in my smoothies.

You really can’t go wrong with any of the fruit combinations the Yoplait Smoothie comes in. All of them are quite good and I enjoyed them equally. The Triple Berry, made up of strawberries, blueberries and raspberries, had an almost candy-like flavor with the blueberries and raspberries standing out the most. The Strawberry Banana had a nice balance between the two fruits in it. Finally, the Strawberry Mango Pineapple had a great tropical flavor. While the fruits are tasty, what truly makes these smoothies really delicious are the frozen yogurt pieces, which gives them an added sweetness and flavor. But that shouldn’t be surprising because there are two things Yoplait is good at: cleverly adding a French word to the English vernacular and making tasty yogurt.

Each smoothie does have a very slight artificial sweetener aftertaste, thanks to the sucralose, but again, it’s very slight and you may not even notice it. Also, the Triple Berry has a lot of seeds, but I can’t blame Yoplait for that, only Mother Nature, or the botanists who haven’t been able to make seedless strawberries and raspberries.

Overall, the Yoplait Smoothie kits are easy to make, delicious and reasonably priced if you compare them with what you get at Jamba Juice. I see myself buying them on a regular basis so that I can have smoothie goodness whenever I want. And if I consume enough of them, I’ll have the skills to work at a Jamba Juice.

(Nutrition Facts – 8 ounces prepared – Triple Berry – 110 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 20 milligrams of sodium, 14 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar and 1 gram of protein. Strawberry Banana – 110 calories, 1 gram of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 15 milligrams of sodium, 14 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 9 grams of sugar and 1 gram of protein. Strawberry Mango Pineapple – 110 calories, 1 gram of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 15 milligrams of sodium, 14 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar and 1 grams of protein.)

Item: Yoplait Smoothie (Triple Berry, Strawberry Banana and Strawberry Mango Pineapple)
Price: $3.00 each
Size: 7.6 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 9 out of 10 (for all flavors)
Pros: All flavors are delicious. Easy to make. Yogurt contains live and active cultures. Contains one serving of fruit. Has significantly less sugar than Jamba Juice smoothies. Reasonably priced.
Cons: Cheap ass blenders might have trouble blending it. Very slight artificial sweetener aftertaste. Triple Berry flavor has a lot of seeds. Turbo-sized Jamba Juice. Femme Boost no longer available at Jamba Juice.

19 thoughts on “REVIEW: Yoplait Smoothie (Triple Berry, Strawberry Banana and Strawberry Mango Pineapple)

  1. Seriously this product was made for lazy ass people. How hard is it to buy yogurt and fruit seperately and blend?? It is cheaper , easy, and can have more smoothies for your money

  2. Do they have many Jamba Juices in your state? They just opened a location back up near where I live…it had been closed while they tore down the old strip mall and built a new strip mall. I haven’t ever been to one yet though.

  3. @Chuck: There are three or four within a five mile radius from my apartment. We have a lot of Jamba Juice locations here. They’re in most of the major shopping malls.

  4. Lazy? This product is for highly motivated go-getters only. Those overachievers who make Kraft Mac & Cheese on the stove would go for this.

    This is definitely an active lifestyle product. I consider anything that can’t be prepared by the time Maury comes back from commercial break gourmet and unnecessary.

    Amanda, talk to the Cheeto filled hand. Marvo, I look forward to your next review geared towards patriots, no more of this French gourmet crap. You’re taking fair and balanced too far man!

  5. I agree with amanda; it’s so easy to make a smoothie at home. I use frozen fruit, soy milk, and apple sauce. At least that cuts out most of the heinous chemicals.

    On the other hand, if I could buy a cute, chemical-laden Marvo-in-bunny-ears at the store, I would totally do it.

  6. I love a good smoothie, and since my roomie just rescently got her bonus I might be able to swindle her into getting a descent blender… I just love a good smoothie. Although I almost feel guilty for being so lazy. *blush*

  7. Mmm yummy!! :)
    We found in ours that the fruit really outweighed the yogurt bits so we had to dig through the bag a few times to make sure there was yogurt in the smoothie.
    Other then that, it was super yummy!

  8. @Poop Chef: I hope I’ll be able to review a high calorie American burger.

    @Kiki: Apple sauce. Hmm…Never thought about adding that. As for a bunny ear Marvo, would you also like it in a bunny suit with the cotton tail?

    @Ms. Spanks: Nothing wrong with being lazy once in awhile. It’s really important to get a decent blender. I’d suggest Willams-Sonoma if you want to spend more money than you’d like. This comment was not sponsored by Williams-Sonoma.

    @erin brooks: It’s better than a rough.

    @Lex: It was super duper yummy.

    @The Frozen Food Master: We should start a club called, “Lazy Asian Men Who Love Smoothies.”

    @The Crisper: Try it! Love it! Buy Yoplait stock!

  9. The apple sauce in my smoothie recipe is to add a bit of sweetness, since the frozen fruit and soy milk are unsweetened.

    Okay, bunny ear Marvo in a full bunny suit AND tail? Sounds kind of perverted…but I’ll take it.

  10. @Kiki: I see. I use sweetened frozen fruit and vanilla soy milk because I like my frozen fruit and soy milk the same way I like my stripper pole — sweet to the tongue.

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