I livez in Philadelphia, which iz Wawa country. I lovez my Wawa just az much az I lovez my Philliez, but recentlyz I wanted to seez what the fusz waz aboutz over the central and western Pennsylvaniaâ€™z version of Wawa, which iz Sheetz. Az a huge Wawa fan, I waz skeptical of Sheetz and I feltz guilty to cheatz on my beloved.
Howeverz, despite the cheezy way of using Zâ€™s instead of Sâ€™s like theyâ€™re trying to appeal to the kidz, Sheetz iz slightly better bcuz you can actually eatz your made-to-order food at most Sheetz locationz. Yez, you can actually take your date to a gaz station for a romantic dinner of made-to-order subz, wrapz and coffeez.
If you really want to impress, perhaps go for the Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpet Cupoâ€™ccino.
I was thirsty for a 32-ounce fountain Diet Dr Pepper when I entered Sheetz, but when I saw the little decal on the DIY Cappuccinoâ€¦ ahem, I mean Cupoâ€™ccino machine, my thirst for something ice cold disappeared. This hot liquid is a Keystone state powerhouse; not only does it come from Sheetz, but it’s Tastykake-flavored. I think the only thing that could possibly trump this would be a scrapple-flavored Cupoâ€™ccino served in a plastic Phillies (or Pirates) helmet that Dairy Queen used to use for their sundaes (I ALWAYS got the damn Montreal Expos). Or maybe a cheesesteak-flavored cupoâ€™ccino served inside of the Liberty Bell. Luckily for this non-native Pennsylvanian, scrapple or cheesesteak flavor is not available as a beverage choice in the Cupoâ€™ccino machine at Sheetz.
The drink comes out steaming hot, but extremely watery looking. It wasnâ€™t promising, especially how I was fantasizing how good this thing was going to be after discovering one of my favorite snack cakes morphed into a drinkable concoction found only at a glorified gas station (Yes, itâ€™s also a restaurant, but it IS technically a gas station).
Hotter than a freakinâ€™ supernova when it hits your tongue, the Butterscotch Krimpet Cupoâ€™ccino isnâ€™t as yummy as a heavily sweetened pseudo coffee beverage can be. Iâ€™ve had my fair share of hot chocolates and phony cappuccinos from Sheetzâ€™s rival, and theyâ€™re always good. Yes, they have enough sugar to rot your teeth and gums, but they still have substance. The Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpet Cupoâ€™ccino would have been better if it wasnâ€™t so thin. It had the potential to be creamy and good.
Maybe it was running out and I got short changed. Since it’s only $1.39, I might be willing to give it another try if Iâ€™m ever near a Sheetz. Then again, Iâ€™ll probably go for that fountain Diet Dr Pepper, or just splurge a dollar more and order one of their barista style coffees. Oh, excuse me, coffeez.
(Nutrition Facts – 16 ounces – 300 calories, 10 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 150 milligrams of sodium, 50 grams of carbohydrates, 38 grams of sugar and 0 grams of protein.)
Item: Sheetz Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpet Cupoâ€™ccino Price: $1.39 Size: 16 ounces (medium) Purchased at: Sheetz Rating: 5 out of 10 Pros: Itâ€™s Tastykake flavored. Being able to sit down at a gas station and eat a meal. Baseball helmet sundaes. Possibility of using the Liberty Bell to serve liquids. DIY coffee machines. Cons: Super watery. The god-awful way they spell items at Sheetz. Tons of sugar and fat. Always getting the Montreal Expos sundae helmet. Doesnâ€™t taste butterscotchy enough.
For my heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, nausea and diarrhea, I trust Pepto-Bismol. But only because it rhymes with rectal dismal. I have a lot of faith in medications that rhyme with a symptom I’m feeling.
Their latest product is Pepto-Bismol with InstaCool, which are chewable tablets with a peppermint flavor and cooling sensation. According to Pepto-Bismol, the peppermint and cooling feeling, “lets you know relief is on the way.”
But their old products did the same thing. I think the chalkiness of their original tablets and the sludge-like liquid Pepto-Bismol sliding down my digestive system are great ways to let me know relief is on the way.
Pepto-Bismol with InstaCool is available in quantities of 30 tablets.
Fortunately, it doesn’t taste like bird feed and it doesn’t make me molt or want to poop on a parked car’s windshield, despite containing 20 percent of my daily recommended intake of fiber per serving.
Just like the cereal itself, the athletes’ faces on the front of the box are kind of freaky looking. Each athlete looks like they’re holding a flashlight under their face so they can tell ghost stories.
The cereal is made up of lightly sweetened crunchy whole wheat flakes and crisp rice with real honey and cinnamon. Yes, it does sound significantly better than what original Wheaties is made of, which I believe is the depressing combination of bran, cardboard, Nickelback lyrics and whatever makes babies cry. The wheat flakes in Wheaties Fuel aren’t like regular Wheaties, instead they’re tiny, and the crisp rice aren’t airy like Rice Krispies, instead they’re dense.
The pieces of cereal might be small, but they pack a vitamin and mineral punch. A serving is like a Flintstones vitamin, containing vitamin A, vitamin C, calcium, iron, vitamin D, vitamin E and a few others. It’s also like an energy drink since it contains 100 percent of your daily recommended intake of vitamin B1, vitamin B2, vitamin B3, vitamin B6 and vitamin B12.
It has a nice cinnamon flavor that makes it taste almost like a kid’s cereal instead of one meant for athletes, but it isn’t too sweet. Because it’s a dense cereal, it’s quite crunchy and lasts awhile in milk. It’s so tasty that if I were a world-class athlete, instead of some dude who writes product reviews in his underwear, I’d rather have my scary face printed on a box of Wheaties Fuel than on regular Wheaties.
(Nutrition Facts – 3/4 cup w/o milk – 210 calories, 3 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 1.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 120 milligrams of potassium, 46 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, 27 grams of other carbohydrates, 3 grams of protein and a whole lot of vitamins and minerals.)
Item: Wheaties Fuel Price: $4.98 Size: 17.1 ounces Purchased at: The Blue Vest Superstore Rating: 8 out of 10 Pros: Tasty cinnamon flavor that tastes almost like a kid’s cereal. Doesn’t taste like regular Wheaties. Loaded with B vitamins. Stays crunchy in milk. Five grams of fiber per serving. My knowledge of mainstream sports stars. Cons: Looks like bird food. Comes in a small box. Athletes’ faces on the box look like they’re telling ghost stories. The image of me writing reviews in my underwear. Original Wheaties. Birds pooping on my car windshield. My knowledge of non-mainstream sports stars.
I once had a shot called German Death. All I need is the Irish Death Ale, French Death Champagne and Spanish Death Sangria to complete my journey along the European Road to Alcohol Poisoning. (via TBQ)