REVIEW: McDonald’s Real Fruit Smoothies (Wild Berry & Strawberry Banana)

The coolest thing about the McDonald’s Real Fruit Smoothies are not the smoothies themselves, even though they’re made with ice, but rather how they’re made.

The machine that blends it is part-coffee vending machine, part-blender, part-dishwasher and, because it has a touchscreen, part-iPhone. With that technological combination, I’m surprised these space-aged blenders haven’t become self-aware and tried to take over the world, or because they’re part-iPhone, lose their ability to make smoothies if you hold them the wrong way.

Watching the McWorker make my McDonald’s Real Fruit Smoothies was like watching a NASCAR pit crew do their thing (or Formula One for our foreign readers). She made my Wild Berry and Strawberry Banana smoothies with speed and precision.

Actually, let me take that back. The blender made my smoothies with speed and precision.

All she had to do was select the smoothie I wanted and the proper size on the touchscreen and the blender did the rest, dropping crushed ice into the blending container, oozing the low-fat yogurt and fruit puree into the container and blending all of it to perfection. All of that took less than 30 seconds. Then after she pulled out the blending container and poured my smoothie into a cup, she placed it upside down on a tray and water started shooting up to rinse it. Within seconds, it was ready to make another smoothie.

The Wild Berry flavor consists of a mix of strawberries, blackberries and blueberries, while the Strawberry Banana is made up of self-explanation. As I mentioned above, each is blended with low-fat yogurt and ice, which creates a consistency that I would describe as easily suckable. While sucking, I was surprised to find seeds among the ice granules in both smoothie flavors, since it gets its “real fruits” via a puree.

Blueberries were the dominate flavor in the Wild Berry smoothie, and I could hardly detect the strawberries and blackberries. As for the Strawberry Banana smoothie, I thought the strawberries had the stronger flavor. However, I thought both flavors tasted like store-brand yogurt.

I didn’t enjoy the McDonald’s Real Fruit Smoothies as much as their coffee-flavored counterparts, the Frappé. But I do think they’re inexpensive and decent tasting smoothies.

And I’m not just saying that to please our future McDonald’s blender overlords so that they’ll spare me and not turn me into a smoothie.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 small smoothie – Wild Berry – 210 calories, 0.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 30 milligrams of sodium, 48 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 44 grams of sugar, 2 gram of protein, 2% vitamin A, 80% vitamin C, 8% calcium and 6% iron. Strawberry Banana – 210 calories, 0.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 35 milligrams of sodium, 49 grams of carbohydrates, 44 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein, 2% vitamin A, 70% vitamin C, 8% calcium and 6% iron.)

Item: McDonald’s Real Fruit Smoothies (Wild Berry & Strawberry Banana)
Price: $2.29 each
Size: 12 ounces (small)
Purchased at: McDonald’s
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Decent tasting. Easily suckable. Reasonably priced. Low fat. Awesome source of vitamin C. Made in an awesome blender. No high fructose corn syrup. Having my life spared by our future blender overlords.
Cons: Not as tasty as the Frappé. Uses fruit puree, instead of pieces of fruit. Not a good source of calcium. Not having balanced fruit flavors. Being turned into a smoothie by our future blender overlords.

21 thoughts to “REVIEW: McDonald’s Real Fruit Smoothies (Wild Berry & Strawberry Banana)”

  1. have you had the Jack in the Box smoothies, one wonders? they sound similar. which seemed to have been inspired by the Starbucks smoothies

  2. Sounds pretty tasty and the no HFCS is nice. But, that’s still a lot of sugar. I might try one though when I need a semi-healthy sugar rush.

    1. Jesus Christ you sugar Nazis are ridiculous. It’s fruit. Do you often eat fruit which is completely devoid of sugar?

      You guys would have the pleasureable aspects of food stripped from everything if you were given the chance.

  3. lol Speed and precision! Dang, those McWorkers are good, but they get low pay! Now, I want to try those smoothies, but still on showing up around the area where I live. Great Review!

  4. I wish they would just use some fucking frozen fruit! It’s not difficult to store! You just need a freezer! Everything else there comes pre-frozen…

  5. because there is a touch screen it is part iphone? That is really stupid. Because I have two arms does that make me part octopus?

  6. Hahahahah that last comment had me laughing for some time, I think Ill drive next door and get me a hamburger smoothie sit down and read more articles by this Marvo guy. Ill be expecting a witty ass reply whether it be from Marvo or another fatty that has nothing better to do then browse the internet <—-

  7. @TG: Hey, TG! Long time no hear. I have had the JITB smoothies. I thought they were all right, but I haven’t tried the Starbucks smoothies. Hmm…I smell possible review.

    @amanda: I have no problem sucking. You read every review, so you know how much I suck. 🙁

    @Michael: nice comment

    @Chuck: Nah, just go for a Slurpee. Although, Slurpees have HFCS. Although, if it’s super hot, just drink half of it (less HFCS) and then pour the rest over your head.

    @Steve: Thanks! I guess you found them because I linked to your review below.

    @JamieSusan: I thought the exact same thing. Their burgers, fries, and chicken all come frozen, why not their fruit. After all, they’re not calling it Real Fresh Fruit Smoothies.

    @mike: Really? Is that the best kind of insulting comment you could leave behind. It’s like you put no effort into it. I know tweens that can leave better comments than you did. Geez, you need to go hang out and read comments on Digg.

    Here’s how I would’ve done it.

    First, you’re using capitalization all wrong. If you’re going to start off with a lowercase letter, then ALL of your words should be lowercase. Although, for more emphasis, you could’ve said “THAT IS REALLY STUPID!” in all uppercase. See that, it’s like you’re yelling at me because you can’t yell at me in person. I personally would said, “THAT IS REALLY FUCKING STUPID” because profanity, or as I prefer to call it, Webster’s Sugar, adds more emphasis. Also, I prefer to use contractions. “THAT’S REALLY FUCKING STUPID” flows better. Oh, don’t forget to include in exclamation point.

    But wait, I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s analyze your first sentence. Again, use contractions. Also, use txt speak because it’s shorter and it make it harder for me to determine if you’re a teenaged girl or a 30 year old man pretending to be a teenage girl. Although, your username, kind of gives it away. But next time use something a little more ambiguous like iloveboys2010. Again, hard to determine if you’re a teenaged girl or a 30 year old pedophile. Another thing you’re missing is typos. Any good insulting comment has typos. So here’s how I would rewrite your first sentence, “cuz their’s a touch screen it’s part iphone?”

    Of course, I went over your second paragraph, so right now we have “cuz their’s a touch screen it’s part iphone? THAT’S REALLY FUCKING STUPID!”

    Okay, let’s move on to your last sentence. Again, let’s start off with the txt speak, so “because” is shortened to “cuz.” Now, I feel like your octopus example is kind of weak. I might’ve gone with “cuz I sit on the toilet whenever I have to take a pee, does that make me part woman” or “cuz I left a poorly constructed insulting comment on some shitty blog, does that make me a dick.”

    So let’s put it all together. “cuz their’s a touch screen it’s part iphone? THAT’S REALLY FUCKING STUPID! cuz I left a poorly constructed insulting comment on some shitty blog, does that make me a dick.”

    Perfect!

    @Heather: Yes, read more articles by me. All 900-something of them. Bask in the glow of my writing and your computer monitor.

  8. Marvo – Strangely enough, there are no 7-11’s in my city, even though it’s one of the largest cities in the US. Weird, huh?

  9. Aww yeah! Triple snap snap snap in a z-formation in the air with a head tilt right afterward. That’s how a witty comeback is done!

  10. Saved! I guess I won’t be able to even try one since they aren’t vegetarian. Ew, gelatin!

    Even better, since the kids are self imposed vegetarians I won’t get hassled into buying them one. 🙂

  11. I like McDonald’s real fruit smoothies. I think the important thing is that they have no high fructose corn syrup. The fact that they’re not made with real frozen fruit is not important to me since the only difference between real frozen fruit and frozen fruit frappe is the “frappe”. I think they taste good and the fact that they’re not overpriced (like Starbucks) is a bonus! The blenders are really cool too, because they shorten prep time! I won’t complain about the wages McDonald’s pays their employees since I don’t really want to pay more for their food.

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