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REVIEW: Bud Light & Clamato Chelada
(Editor’s Note: Today’s review is based on the popular Bud Light Real Men of Genius ads. If you’ve never heard or seen these ads, check out this site to get a taste of them.) Bud Light presents Real Men of Genius (Real Men of Genius) Today we salute you, Mr. Bud Light & Clamato Chelada Inventor. (Mr. Bud [...]
Continue reading...REVIEW: Nice Look Drink
1 December 2008
They did it. I can’t fucking believe it. Someone is selling a canned beverage that has bird spit in it. Is demand really that high? Or was there a choice between a drink based on bird spit or bird balls soup? I guess the Nice Look Drink is a Chinese [...]
Continue reading...REVIEW: Furuta Sequoia Strawberry Chocolate
26 November 2008
There’s a saying: If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. I usually thought of it as a bullshit saying because where’s the fun in that? Evil geniuses like me couldn’t fail to take over the world if we lived by those stupid sayings. Batman wouldn’t have had the rubber nipples suit and [...]
Continue reading...Cherry Cassis Kombucha Wonder Drink
13 December 2007
I believe I have found something worse than coal that Santa can give out to the naughty kids for Christmas this year. If jolly St. Nick wants to be pissed off St. Dick and punish all the little shits around the world, he should stick the Cherry Cassis Kombucha Wonder Drink in their stockings [...]
Continue reading...Hormel Compleats Roast Beef and Gravy
19 September 2007
If a complete dinner in less than two minutes doesn’t appeal to you, then you’re either lying to me or to yourself. People barely have time to put on their pants before they get out of the house, a problem that has cost me several hundred dollars and a few restraining orders. Hormel understands and [...]
Continue reading...Chicken of the Sea Mandarin Orange Salmon Cups
10 August 2007
I take back everything bad I said about other things I reviewed, this is proof that the devil lives among us. And apparently the devil takes on the form of a blonde mermaid who hocks packaged fish products. Nice try, you sleazy merchant of lies. You don’t even really exist in nature, your origin came [...]
Continue reading...Bath & Body Works Temptations Iced Tea Twist
8 July 2007
Right now, I want you to close your eyes and imagine me washing my body with the Bath & Body Works Temptations Iced Tea Twist. Do you like what you’re picturing in your mind? If you’re having a hard time thinking of what my lathered up bod looks like, let me help you [...]
Continue reading...Libby’s Zesty Barbecue Vienna Sausage
14 June 2007
(Editor’s Note: Just to let you know, this review wasn’t written by me. It doesn’t have any references to Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Rosie or my inability to please women. This review was penned by new TIB writer Ace, who had his own product review blog called Here to Eat, but is [...]
Continue reading...McDonald’s Crispy Chicken Bacon Ranch Sandwich
24 August 2004
The best way to describe the McDonald’s Crispy Chicken Bacon Ranch Sandwich is call it the result of a wild sex romp between a McChicken Sandwich and a Crispy Chicken Bacon Ranch Salad. Imagine the oily and wet action with lettuce flying everywhere and sesame seed buns being slapped. Oh yeah! Oh wait! What [...]
Continue reading...Salt and Pepper Pringles Potato Chips
19 August 2004
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A couple months ago, I tried the limited edition Ketchup Pringles, which I purchased from the national, small-business destroying superstore behemoth I sometimes shop at. I really enjoyed them, although this is from someone who thinks ketchup goes great with anything. While watching a Pimp My Ride marathon and mowing down the can [...]
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8 January 2009
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