REVIEW: Coca-Cola Orange (Japan)

Coca-Cola Orange (Japan)

In order to taste an orange-flavored Coca-Cola, you could do it the easy way.

That involves visiting one of the many Coke Freestyle machines throughout the country and selecting a Coke with orange flavoring. Here’s a link to help you find your nearest Coke Freestyle machine. There’s probably one within driving distance from you.

But if you want to taste an orange-flavored Coca-Cola the hard way, you could search eBay for someone selling Coca-Cola Orange, which is new in Japan, mull over spending $10 or more to purchase and ship a bottle from an eBay seller in Japan, decide to pull the trigger when you rationalize to yourself that it’s cheaper than flying to Japan, and then wait 1-2 weeks for it to arrive.

Guess which path I chose.

Yes, I took the harder option. I believe a wise man once said, “Satisfaction is sweeter when the tougher path is taken.” Or did I read that from a fortune cookie? Or is that a combination of inspirational song lyrics?

Anyhoo, I picked up a bottle of this limited edition soda from a seller in Japan for the low price of $3.99 plus $8.99 for shipping.

When it comes to new flavors, Coke in Japan is much more conservative than Pepsi Japan, who puts out exotic flavors like baobab, cucumber, and strawberry milk. The other Coke Japan flavor I tried was green tea. That might sound exotic to you, but in Japan green tea is like pumpkin spice in the U.S. It’s in everything.

Coca-Cola Orange (Japan) Closeup

Coca-Cola Orange has a slight orangey aroma to it and, when I hold it up to a light, it looks like it has a slight orange hue. To me, its flavor ratio is 70 percent Coke and 30 percent orange, which makes it taste 100 percent awesome, or as the Japanese would say, sugoi. That’s your Japanese lesson for the day and there will be a pop quiz at the end of this review.

I’ve had Coke with Lime and Coke with Lemon before, and the thing with those flavors was that they had a floor cleaner-ish vibe to them. But there’s none of that with Coca-Cola Orange. According to the label, there’s no fruit juice, so it’s not a natural orange flavor. The orange is artificial, but it definitely enhances the Coke with a pleasant sweet citrus flavor.

Now that I think about it, the flavor combination would make a great Coke Float. Imagine a Creamsicle Coke Float. That would be…what’s the Japanese word for awesome?

I told you there would be a pop quiz.

(Nutrition Facts – 100 ml – 47 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 11.7 grams of carbohydrates, and 0 grams of protein.)

Item: Coca-Cola Orange (Japan)
Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 500 ml
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: Better tasting than Coke with Lime and Coke with Lemon. Orange doesn’t taste floor cleaner-ish. I think it would be great in Coke Float form. Doing things the easy way.
Cons: Not made with fruit juice. Pop quizzes. Spending over $10 per bottle when purchased from eBay. Kind of boring compared with the flavors Pepsi Japan comes out with. Doing things the hard way.

REVIEW: Green Tea Coke Plus With Catechin

It’s hard to imagine why it’s taken so long for the Japanese makers of Coke to come up with the Green Tea Coke Plus with Catechin. After all, the Japanese love green tea. They love it HARD. I think they love it just as much as smoking, manga, short schoolgirl skirts, posing for pictures and physically abusive game shows.

I’m also surprised the American makers of Coke didn’t come up with it sooner because, as they’ve proven time and time again, they’ll shoehorn almost anything into their cola. They’ll shoehorn it HARD. Some ingredients they’ve added to Coke or Diet Coke include: coffee, vanilla, black cherry, lime, lemon, Splenda, cherry and zeros.

Although it doesn’t specifically say on its label, the Green Tea Coke Plus with Catechin is really less like regular Coke and more like either Diet Coke or Coke Zero since it contains artificial sweeteners and no calories. Despite its name, it doesn’t contain vitamins like the U.S. version of Diet Coke Plus. The “plus” in this soda’s name is either for the catechins the green tea provides or it’s being marketed to sumo wrestlers.

Catechins are antioxidants and are mostly found in teas, but also in some chocolates. Studies have shown that catechins prevent plaque from building up on artery walls, some forms of cancer and aging. In my personal studies with catechins and green tea, it seems to turn me into a pompous ass by making me extend my pinky outward when drinking tea.

The Green Tea Coke Plus’ smell and initial flavor reminds me of the American version of Coke Zero, but not as prominent, which doesn’t surprise me because Coke from Japan tends to have a slightly muted flavor compared with their American counterparts. The green tea flavor doesn’t kick in until a few moments later, but when it does, it’s subtle and without any of the bitterness that green tea is known for.

Being someone who enjoys Coke Zero, I enjoyed the flavor of the Green Tea Coke Plus with Catechin, although I wish it had a little bit more green tea flavor. As for the catechins, I think you’d be better off drinking cups of regular green tea because there’s probably not a significant amount of catechins in each bottle of Green Tea Coke Plus, unlike green tea itself.

But overall, I like it HARD.

(Note: Orchid64, who purchased and sent the Green Tea Coke Plus for me, also reviewed it, along with Mike’s Blender. Also, below is a stupid experiment I did with the second bottle of Green Tea Coke Plus I had. It’s stupid because I totally wasted a good bottle of soda that’s hard for me to obtain. Enjoy my wastefulness.)

Item: Green Tea Coke Plus With Catechin
Price: 147 yen
Size: 500 ml
Purchased at: Received from Orchid64
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: I like it HARD. Tastes like Coke Zero. No calories. Easy to drink. I guess some catechins are better than no catechins. Green tea. Short schoolgirl skirts on women 18 years old or older. Japanese game shows.
Cons: Only available in Japan. Not enough green tea flavor for me. Not sure how much catechins it provides, but it’s probably not much. Wasting a perfectly good bottle of soda with a stupid dated Mentos experiment.

THE WEEK IN REVIEWS – 6/13/2009

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs wrapped in an HTML shell and served with immature writing.

Doritos with a dried ramen noodle-esque flavor packet? Sounds like something to snort. (via We Rate Stuff)

Looks like I’m going to have to break out the Birkenstocks if I decide to enjoy an organic chocolate hemp shake. (via I Ate A Pie)

I’m surprised a green tea Coke didn’t happen sooner in Japan, but I guess the Japanese have been too busy making marshmallow-looking cars and erecting Gundam statues. (via Japanese Snack Reviews)

Which would you prefer? Cheese crackers made by elves or those made by some dude named Lance? (via Second Rate Snacks)

World of Warcraft sucking hours of your life? You can suck back on a World of Warcraft Mountain Dew. (via BevReview)

NEWS: You Can Now Suck On Mother’s Cans…As An Adult

When I think of Mother Nature, I imagine a little old lady walking on a grassy plain with cheerful birds, bunnies, and butterflies circling around her on a bright sunny day and with a few white lazy clouds here and there.

The setting would be much like the default wallpaper for Windows XP.

With an image like that it’s hard for me to put Mother Nature and energy drink in the same sentence, even though I just did, but believe me it was frickin’ difficult. Energy drinks are for young whippersnappers, not little old ladies who need a cane to walk and need to wear a medical alert bracelet just in case they’ve fallen and can’t get up.

But Coke has brought the two together to make an Acai berry flavored energy drink from natural sources with their new Full Throttle Mother Energy Drink, which has probably the least aggro, extreme, and intense name for an energy drink EVER.

Sure, the name is also kind of oedipus complex-ish and for something that claims to be natural, it doesn’t seem to be organic, but despite all of that, I really look forward to trying it.

[Via:] Energy Fiend

Coca-Cola Vanilla Zero

Hi. Coca-Cola Vanilla Zero here, but you can call me Coke Vanilla Zero for short.

Ever since my cousin Coke Vanilla came back to store shelves, he’s been partying it up and acting like he’s the greatest thing since Diet Coke. But to be honest he’s more like New Coke. Anyway, when he came back, he brought me along with him, and I’m glad he did, but ever since, he’s dragged me to all the parties and nightclubs just to be his wingman

I hate being his wingman and I tell him that. I’d rather just stay at home, watch some HGTV, maybe a little Discovery Channel, while eating some popcorn and sipping on a Diet Pepsi. But somehow he guilts me into going by saying something like, “Our cousin, Coke with Lemon loved to be my wingman, and would be, if he were still alive.”

I loved Coke with Lemon and may he rest in peace in Discontinued Product Heaven, but he would do anything you told him to, because he was a fucking spineless moron. Maybe he fell one too many times at the bottling plant, I don’t know, but his bottle was half-empty, if you know what I mean. For example, just because he had lemon in him, he thought he was a frickin’ Sprite.

Anyway, back to my other moron cousin, Coke Vanilla.

Being his wingman is tough because he will usually choose the beautiful woman with either a friend that kind of looks like a 300-pound Lorena Bobbitt, a friend that has the personality of anything inanimate, or a scary looking friend who should have the words “cock block” tattooed on her forehead. I think he chooses these particular women with the crazy friends just to spite me.

I don’t even think I’m a good wingman. First off, I have nothing good to say about my cousin Coke Vanilla to make him seem appealing to women, unless I like my pants on fire, like a liar. Secondly, I have “Zero” in my name. Who’d want to talk to a guy with a last name like that, because it’s like having “Penis” as a last name. Sure, I have a decent body because I have no calories, no fat and no carbs, but that doesn’t matter because I don’t even taste very good and I get all nervous around women. There’s supposed to be vanilla in me, but I don’t even taste it. It’s like the line between vanilla flavor and the artificial sweetener taste is blurred with me.

Maybe my cousin Coke Vanilla is the better soda and maybe that’s the reason why he ends up with three Fantanas and I end up with the least attractive fourth Fantana, who also turned out to be crazy, needy, and for someone who dances a lot in the Fanta commercials, she sure doesn’t move much in bed. It’s like I’m doing it with a mannequin.

You know which one of the Fantanas I’m talking about.

Item: Coca-Cola Vanilla Zero
Price: 99 cents (20 ounces)
Purchased at: 7-Eleven
Rating: 2 out of 5
Pros: Zero calories. Zero fat. Zero carbs. Decent body. Getting three Fantanas.
Cons: Can’t taste the vanilla. Not very good tasting. Horrible wingman. Having “Penis” as a last name. Getting the crazy, least attractive Fantana. Cock blockers.