The Impulsive Buy » Energy Drink

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 1/21/2012

Marvo — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

Hmm…Peanut butter jelly in a slimy energy bar form or, with a few more ingredients, a form that’ll make me drunk enough to eat peanut butter jelly in a slimy energy bar form. Decisions. (via Crazy Food Dude and Food Junk)

Turns out the McDonald’s Hot Habanero sauce is as spicy as a Ronald McDonald and Wendy romance. (via An Immovable Feast)

There’s already a Big Cock Energy Drink, so of course someone had to make a Little Pussie Energy Drink. So now that this low bar has been set, I guess we just have to wait for Guarana Gangbang Go-Go Juice. (via Possessed by Caffeine)

Swedish fish…but not what many of you might be thinking of. (via Dave’s Cupboard)

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 12/10/2011

Marvo — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

You got your Tabasco in my chocolate! You got your chocolate in my Tabasco! Two great tastes that seem kind of weird together. (via Candyblog)

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, eating her Greens & Whey. Along came a spider, who landed in the Greens & Whey beside her and its taste scared the spider away. (via Rodzilla Reviews)

Spoiler alert! The surprise in this Pure Protein Peanut Butter Caramel Surprise Bar is that it sucks. (via Crazy Food Dude)

Damn the Japanese and their foods that are too cute to eat. (via Japanese Snack Reviews)

Only a handful of you will get this reference: So move back ya self dread, you know the element. The Tribe is good for your health like a can of Nutrament. (via Foodette Reviews)

Image via flickr user ErinKhoo / CC BY 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 11/26/2011

Marvo — Sat, 26 Nov 2011 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

Back in the 1980s, Snickers was promoted as a candy bar that could satisfy me, but it never could satisfy my childhood hunger. Too bad Snickers back then didn’t come in a one pound size, like they do today. (via Candyblog)

Hey, guys who like to cheat on your girlfriend or wife. Can’t come up with a good explanation for why you have the smell of perfume on you to your girlfriend or wife after coming home late? Well, you have one now. (via Foodstuff Finds)

I fully believe a bottle of Extenze Male Enlargement Energy Shot could extend my penis, if I duct tape the bottle to the tip of my penis. (via Possessed by Caffeine)

Many of you are probably sick of seeing, smelling, or hearing about turkey, so here’s a Turkey Hill ice cream review for you. Oh, and here’s another Turkey Hill ice cream review. All hate mail can be sent to theimpulsivebuy at gmail dot com. (via Junk Food Guy and Crazy Food Dude)

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 11/19/2011

Marvo — Sat, 19 Nov 2011 10:08:40 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

Hell yeah! I can now enjoy Girl Scout cookies without having to look into the money-sucking eyes of little Daisies and Brownies. (via Food Junk)

This breathable energy shot looks like it would be a good replacement for my current breathable energy shot — crack cocaine. (via ED Junkie)

A canned hemp drink doesn’t sound natural and earthy enough to make hippies put down their kombucha tea. But maybe a canned hemp drink in a can made out of hemp would. (via Thirsty Dudes)

They say real men wear pink. But do real men also drink pink? I don’t know if I’m a real man, but I do drink pink when I have nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, or diarrhea. (via Japanese Snack Reviews)

I don’t know about you, but this beverage sounds like it’s a great way to mess with drug testing lab technicians. (via Foodstuff Finds)

Image via flickr user Marit & Toomas Hinnosaar / CC BY 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 11/12/2011

Marvo — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 11:09:28 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

Bottled water with caffeine isn’t very impressive. Bottled water with radioactive materials that could mess with my DNA and give me super powers would be impressive. (via Food Junk)

Worx may work, but there is something Worx needs to work on — spelling. (via Possessed by Caffeine)

What would I do for this Klondike bar? Probably nothing and just let it melt away. Unless I was starving to death, then I’d kill someone for it. (via Crazy Food Dude)

Jamie Oliver makes junk food? Am I in an alternate universe where the Top Gear guys mostly review reasonably priced cars and put stars in an expensive supercar? (via Gobble Monkey)

Arby’s Super Reuben does look super, and when I say “looks super” I mean it looks like it was killed with kryptonite. (via Would I Buy It Again)

Image via flickr user quinn.anya / CC BY SA 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 9/3/2011

Marvo — Sat, 03 Sep 2011 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

A churros cereal? I hope the next state fair food that gets turned into a breakfast cereal ends up being deep fried Twinkies. (via Rodzilla Reviews)

There’s steak-flavored potato chips. There’s baked potato-flavored potato chips. Now all I need are asparagus-flavored potato chips and I can have a complete steak meal in potato chip form. (via Dave’s Cupboard)

I might be because I just watched Moulin Rouge for the 50th time, but I think sweet southern heat would make a pretty good cabaret show name. (via Hot Chicks Eatin’ Spicy Chips)

This brings back a lot of memories from my childhood. Memories of me pretending to stick chewing tobacco under my lip, hitting the game winning home run in the bottom of the ninth inning with two outs, and yelling, “Who’s the greatest now, Rickey Henderson?” (via TV & Gum Are Awesome)

Remember Cocaine Energy Drink? Well, there’s now an energy shot version. I wonder if they’re working on an energy enema that comes wrapped in a condom with the end tied. (via ED Junkie)

Image via flickr user Claudia_midori / CC BY 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 7/23/2011

Marvo — Sat, 23 Jul 2011 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

Last week, it was fast food condiments. This week, Justin over at An Immovable Feast reviewed hot sauces. Next week, I hope he reviews ketchup packets. (via An Immovable Feast)

I’ve stepped and slipped on poo and each time I’ve never gotten any joy from it. So I’m not sure I’d get joy from a beverage called Kickapoo. However, I have found joy with cow chip throwing. (via The Soda Jerks)

You know what sounds worse than eating a military MRE (Meal Ready to Eat)? Eating a military MRE cold. (via Clearance Cuisine)

Hey, man. There’s a hemp energy drink called Chillo. Dude, an energy drink with the word chill in its name? That totally blows my mind. (via Possessed by Caffeine)

Are you sad the Harry Potter series is over? Temporarily wash away your sadness with Harry Potter’s Butterbeer or intensify your pain with vomit, sausage, dirt, and worm Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans. (via Snack Love and Candy Gurus)

Image via flickr user moonrat42 / CC BY SA 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 7/2/2011

Marvo — Sat, 02 Jul 2011 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

This is perfect for my future fiancée. When I slip it on her finger, I’ll make her feel like the unluckiest woman in the world. (via Candyblog)

Blame it on the caffeine. Got you feeling mean. Blame it on sugar. Got you in the mood for murder. Blame in on the J-J-J-J-Jerk Energy Soda. Blame it on the J-J-J-J-J-Jerk Energy Soda. (via Clearance Cuisine)

You know what would be funny? Trying to drink Novocaine Anti-Energy Drink after your mouth has been injected with novocaine. You know what wouldn’t be funny? Trying to drink Novocaine Anti-Energy Drink after your mouth has been injected with novocaine, uploading a video of it on YouTube, and then watching the negative comments, like “LAME” and “Your a fuckin dumb ass,” get posted after. (via Possessed by Caffeine)

I don’t know if chocolate therapy will work on me. I prefer 40 milligrams of fluoxetine therapy. Or 75 volts of electroconvulsive therapy. (via On Second Scoop)

Aunt Jemima knows pancakes, but she sure doesn’t know frozen microwaveable meals. (via Freezer Aisle Files)

Image via flickr user Alyssa L. Miller / CC BY 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 6/18/2011

Marvo — Sat, 18 Jun 2011 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

Looks like someone might get sued. I have no problem with it, unless drinking it increases Facebook friend requests from those people who were dicks or never talked to me in high school. (via ED Junkie)

Caffeinated ice cream? This is where caffeinated product technology has taken us? Boring. How about caffeinated laundry detergent so I can get a boost of energy every time I wear one of my thongs. (via Caffeine-A-Holic)

I think I’ve watched too many X-Files episodes to drink something called blk. water. (via Thirsty Dudes)

A Lay’s potato chip from Poland that tastes like chicken and spices excites me. I wonder if a Lay’s potato chip from the United States that tastes like barbeque sauce would excite snackers in Poland. (via Food Junk)

If I want to feel pleasure and pain from chocolate, I prefer having hot melted chocolate poured slowly on my chest and not chocolate made with the world’s hottest pepper melting on my tongue. (via Chocolate Reviews)

Image via flickr user Jakob Steinschaden / CC BY ND 2.0

NEWS: V8 Makes The Energy Drink Bandwagon A Little Heavier

Marvo — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 21:47:00 +0000

To say the energy drink market is crowded would be an understatement. So many companies have jumped on the energy drink bandwagon that I don’t think the bandwagon moves anymore because its wheels have been crushed by the weight of all those companies who want a piece of the multibillion dollar energy drink market. Or the bandwagon might not be moving because Steven Seagal’s energy drinks are as heavy as he is now.

One of the latest companies to jump on the bandwagon is V8.

V8 V-Fusion + Energy drinks are made by combining a blend of vegetable and fruit juices with green tea. The green tea provides 80 milligrams of caffeine, which is the same amount in a skinny can of Red Bull. Each energy drink has 50 calories and don’t contain added sugar. The 2.5-ounce V8 Energy Shots contain a blend of nine vegetable and fruit juices, plus green tea. Each energy shot also provide vitamins A, C, E, and a number of B vitamins.

The V8 V-Fusion + Energy Drinks are available at 2,400 Walmart locations and retail for $3.98 for a six-pack of 8-ounce cans. The beverages come in two flavors — Pomegranate/Blueberry and Peach/Mango. ED Junkie posted a review of the V8 V-Fusion + Energy drinks. The V8 Energy Shots retail for $2.99 and are available at participating locations in Colorado, Florida, and Minnesota.

Image via flickr user Tambako the Jaguar / CC BY ND 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 6/11/2011

Marvo — Sat, 11 Jun 2011 11:51:56 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

Jack in the Box is now offering a Three Taco Combo. I can’t wait for the Six Sourdough Jack Pack. (via Review Spew)

Grub Grade reviewed a bunch of natural peanut butters. It would be fitting if you looked over it while eating peanut butter. Or even better, read the review aloud with half a jar of peanut butter in your mouth. (via Grub Grade)

And I’ll see your true colors shining through. I see your true colors and that’s why I love you. So don’t be afraid to let them show your true colors. True colors are beautiful like a rainbow. (via Screaming Energy)

If I bought Mentos’ UP2U gum that has two flavors to choose from in each pack, I wouldn’t know which flavor to chew first. To help, I wish each pack contained a coin I could flip or the cell number for my overbearing ex-girlfriend who would tell me what to chew. (via Gum Alert)

They say, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” But it appears beauty can come to anyone who be holdin’ this beauty elixir in a can. (via Thirsty Dudes)

Image via flickr user Matt McGee / CC BY ND 2.0

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 5/14/2011

Marvo — Sat, 14 May 2011 10:00:00 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

I started up a frozen food review blog called Freezer Aisle Files. It’s been up for a few weeks and so far I’ve discovered it would take a lifetime to review every single Lean Cuisine meal and I learned what suiza is. (via Freezer Aisle Files)

If the drink of choice at the 19th hole of a golf course is beer, then I guess this energy shot for golfers could be the drink of choice at hole number zero. (via Possessed by Caffeine)

What would I do for a new Rocky Road Klondike Bar? Well, I’d see if my local grocer carries it, and if they do, I’d look to see if it’s on sale. If it’s not, I’ll wait until it does or I’ll search the coupon websites I’ve bookmarked and see if there’s a coupon I can print. If it’s on sale, I’ll first see if Ben & Jerry’s or Haagen Dazs has a new flavor and I’ll pick up that instead. But if not, I’ll probably get the Rocky Road Klondike Bar. (via On Second Scoop)

Trader Joe’s has a Japanese rice and vegetable bento box. Sounds like Trader Joe’s loves Asian boxes as much as I do. (via Freezer Burns)

Adam at Grub Grade reviewed the new McDonald’s McCafe Chocolate Banana Shake…which he purchased at eight in the morning. Well, it looks like I’ll be ordering a milkshake with my next Sausage McMuffin. (via Grub Grade)

Image via flickr user Corey Ann / CC BY ND 2.0

REVIEW: Nestlé Jamba All Natural Energy Drink (Blueberry Pomegranate, Crisp Apple & Strawberry Banana)

Marvo — Tue, 10 May 2011 10:42:29 +0000

Let me show you the ingredients list for the new Strawberry Banana Nestlé Jamba All-Natural Energy Drink:

Apple juice and lemon juice (water, juice concentrates), water, apple puree, strawberry puree, banana puree, natural flavor, caffeine, extract of stevia, carbonation added.

Now let me show you the ingredients list for the Orange Rockstar Recovery Energy Drink:

Purified water, orange juice concentrate, taurine, citric acid, natural flavors, sodium citrate, sucrose, caffeine, benzoic acid, sorbic acid, gum arabic, acesulfame potassium, sucralose, calcium pantothemate, niacinamide, panax ginseng root extract, milk thistle extract, magnesium lactate, ester gum, calcium lactate, prickly pear extract, pyridoxine hydrochloride, monopotassium phosphate, apocarotenal, and cyanocobalamin.

As you can see, there are major differences between the two lists. One is a short list of ingredients I’ve heard of and can pronounce, while the other list is a bit longer because it’s made up of a few ingredients I have to learn about through Wikipedia or by seducing a college chemistry lab teaching assistant during her office hours, using lines like, “How about we do some chemical compounding here on your desk?”

But do these differences prove what Jamba has printed on their All-Natural Energy Drink cans, “For us, it is simple — real food & beverages taste better. That makes people happy & they come back for more.”

With their smoothies, it’s very true, because it’s extremely rare for me to have a month without a Jamba Juice smoothie-induced brain freeze. But with their line of All-Natural Energy Drinks, I don’t see myself coming back for more, unless I REALLY feel the need for a Jamba smoothie chaser.

The Nestlé Jamba All-Natural Energy Drinks are available in three fruity flavors: Blueberry Pomegranate, Crisp Apple, and Strawberry Banana. They contain no artificial preservatives, flavors, or colors, and no high fructose corn syrup. And, they contain 70 percent real fruit juice and each can has 90 calories.

Now, all that sounds nice, but when you’re talking about an energy drink, energy junkies care about one thing — caffeine. And I’m happy to say each 8.4-ounce can of Jamba All-Natural Energy Drink contains 80 milligrams of the good stuff, which is the same amount found in a can of Red Bull, or an eight-ounce serving of the Orange Rockstar Recovery Energy Drink I referred to at the beginning of this review.

Although a can of the Jamba All-Natural Energy Drink has 80 milligrams of caffeine, I didn’t feel very caffeinated after drinking one and didn’t seem to get the same energy boost I would from drinking an eight-ounce serving of my energy drinks of choice — any variety of Monster or Rockstar. I believe the reason for this is because of those few ingredients I mentioned earlier that I have to learn about through Wikipedia or by seducing a college chemistry lab teaching assistant during her office hours, using lines like, “How about we swap oxygen and carbon dioxide…with our mouths?”

However, if you’re not a caffeine junkie, I’m sure these will do fine if you’re looking for an all-natural way to get an energy boost.

Besides not giving me a boost like other energy drinks; these Jamba Energy Drinks also don’t taste like other energy drinks, which tend to be a combination of sweet compensating for the bitter. They taste like what one would expect an energy drink with the Jamba Juice logo on it would taste like.

Basically, they’re lightly carbonated, caffeinated juices. The Crisp Apple flavor, which was my favorite of the three, tastes like lightly carbonated, caffeinated apple juice. The Blueberry Pomegranate flavor tastes like lightly carbonated, caffeinated, and slightly tart pomegranate juice with a blueberry finish and a hint of apple. And, the Strawberry Banana flavor tastes like lightly carbonated, caffeinated strawberry juice with a bit of banana and a bit of apple.

Yup, just like at many malls across America, apple is found in all three Jamba Energy Drink flavors.

Overall, the Nestlé Jamba All-Natural Energy Drinks are good and made with ingredients I can pronounce, but a can of it doesn’t satisfy my energy needs, so I don’t see myself purchasing any more. Also, because the Jamba Energy Drinks are lightly carbonated and made with fruit juices and purees, they’re extremely easy to drink, which can cause a can of it to be consumed quicker than expected.

They’re so smooth that I don’t think they’d make good energy drink training bras if you’re looking to get into stronger energy drinks, like Red Bull, Monster, and Rockstar.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 can – Pomegranate Blueberry – 90 calories, 0 grams of fat, 15 milligrams of sodium, 140 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 20 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein. Crisp Apple – 90 calories, 0 grams of fat, 15 milligrams of sodium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, 20 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein. Strawberry Banana – 90 calories, 0 grams of fat, 15 milligrams of sodium, 190 milligrams of potassium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, 20 grams of sugar, 0 grams of protein.)

Item: Nestlé Jamba All Natural Energy Drink (Blueberry Pomegranate, Crisp Apple & Strawberry Banana)
Price: $2.95 each
Size: 8.4 ounces
Purchased at: Jamba Juice
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Blueberry Pomegranate)
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Crisp Apple)
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Strawberry Banana)
Pros: Easy to drink. Taste like fruit juices. Made using ingredients I can pronounce. 90 calories per can. 80 milligrams of sweet, sweet caffeine. No high fructose corn syrup. My ability to seduce college chemistry lab teaching assistants.
Cons: Too easy to drink. Energy boost might not be noticable for caffeineheads. Small cans. Can’s design looks like it’s meant for kids. Doesn’t make a good energy drink training bra. Brain freezes.

WEEK IN REVIEWS – 4/30/2011

Marvo — Sat, 30 Apr 2011 11:21:16 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

If only I had a Dunkin’ Donuts nearby, then I could Do the Dew by dunking a Dunkin’ Donuts donut into the Dunkin’ Donuts Mountain Dew Coolatta. (via On Second Scoop)

I still have the mind of a child. How do I know? Because reading the words Juicy Squirts still make me giggle. (via ZOMG Candy)

I’ve never had a Russian cream soda before, but I imagine (insert Russian reversal joke here). (via Weird Soda Review)

Hey! I just realized caffeinated soap is a great way to get caffeine…through the penis. (via Caffeine-A-Holic)

Sierra Mist is all-natural. Does this mean it has unshaven armpits, wrinkles, and small breasts? (via Eat! Drink! Snack!)

There’s an energy drink for hunters and fishermen. How about an energy drink for the hunted? Their lives are on the line, I think they need it more. (via Caffeine King)

Image via flickr user shawnzrossi / CC BY 2.0

THE WEEK IN REVIEWS – 3/26/2011

Marvo — Sat, 26 Mar 2011 11:30:30 +0000

Here are a few product reviews posted this week from other blogs we follow.

I wonder if Bobby McFerrin knows that Be Happy now comes in a liquid form. If not, someone should tell him because I’m sure he’ll be happy to hear he doesn’t have to sing that song anymore to make people be happy. (via Addicted 2 Energy)

The turkey patty in the Carl’s Jr. Turkey Burger has “zero flavor” and “wasn’t oozing juices, but did retain moisture.” Sounds like someone’s been using my technique for cooking turkey. (via An Immovable Feast and Grub Grade)

Is it just me or does chocolate dipped Peeps look like Peeps sitting in a nest made from poop. Ugh…Must cut back on the skat videos. (via Candyblog)

I still think Mountain Dew Supernova should’ve won the first Dewmocracy, and I’ll burp fight anyone who thinks otherwise. Oh, you don’t know burp fighting. It’s when two people bring their mouths close enough to each other like they’re going to French kiss, but instead of touching each other, they burp into each other mouths until one person can’t take it anymore. It’s fun for the whole carbonated family. (via BevReview)

Take your pick of products from companies that sound like they were named by people talking to babies — Booja Booja or Moo Moo. (via Jim’s Chocolate Mission and Freezer Burns)

Image via flickr user exquisitur / CC BY 2.0