REVIEW: Limited Edition Mystery Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Mystery Oreo Cookies

There are many mysteries that surround the Limited Edition Mystery Oreo Cookies that go beyond the unknown flavor of its creme.

For example, why does it come in a 15.25-ounce package instead of the 12.7 ounce one we now always see with limited edition varieties?

Also, why can Oreo offer $50,000 to one randomly selected grand prize winner and $10,000 to five first-place winners who guess the flavor, but have no money to give out to those of us who were freaked out about Peeps Oreo turning our poop a weird color?

The limited edition snack has chocolate wafers and a food dye-less creme, but the smell that comes out of the packaging is colorful, bright, and familiar. It smells like Fruity Pebbles, which is weird because why would Oreo again offer a fruity cereal flavor a year after Fruity Crisp Oreo. It’s not much of a mystery if it’s easy to guess for eaters.

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With the first several cookies, I only ate the creme and left behind a wake of discarded chocolate wafers. The mystery creme also tastes like Fruity Pebbles, and at times like Froot Loops. But as I licked, ate, and rubbed it over my tongue, an orange and milk flavor stood out. So it got me wondering whether it could be Orange Creamsicle-flavored, which would also be a little odd because there was a Creamsicle Oreo back in 2011. Either way, the mystery creme tastes like it’s been done before.

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While it saddens me that this Mystery Oreo could be a recycled flavor, I do enjoy the creme. But it’s hyper sweet and potent, so much so that it negates the chocolate wafer’s flavor whenever I eat a cookie whole. That’s surprising since a regular complaint I’ve had with several Oreo varieties is how the wafer dampens the creme’s flavor. For some, I imagine the creme will be way too sweet.

I loved Fruity Crisp Oreo, so it’s not surprising that I like these. I also love the idea of having a Mystery Oreo, so I hope there’s a new one every year. But, next year, please don’t have a mystery flavor that tastes like a previous Oreo, those lazy bastards.

Oh, one last mystery about these cookies.

Why is Limited Edition Mystery Oreo wearing white after Labor Day?

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.98
Size: 15.25 oz. package
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Tastes and smells like Fruity Pebbles. Mystery flavors. Available in a size larger than other limited edition flavors.
Cons: Tastes and smells like Fruity Crisp Oreo. Creme might be too sweet for some. Mystery flavor spoilers when you visit your favorite junk food sites. Wearing white after Labor Day.

REVIEW: Oreo Hot Cocoa Mix

Oreo Hot Cocoa Mix

Oreo has become a D-list celebrity that gets paid for club appearances.

Want the iconic cookie to show up in your milkshake, on your doughnut, or attached to your nuts? That can happen for the right price. Yes, Oreo is the Scott Disick or Lil’ Jon of the snack world. YEAH!!!

The latest company to pay the cookie an appearance fee is Kerry, who has Oreo in its hot cocoa mix. No, not you, Kerry, who’s reading this review right now. Kerry, a food company headquartered in Ireland.

The Oreo Hot Cocoa Mix box says it contains “Oreo Cookie Crumbs,” and a quick look at its ingredients list and what’s on an Oreo package shows that’s the case. While both have the same ingredients, the hot cocoa mix doesn’t appear to be a collection of dark cookie crumbs. Instead, it looks like something from Swiss Miss, Nestle, or a quarry.

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I made a cup with water, and, because of my Swiss Miss experiences, I expected it to be, well, um, watery. But that was not the case with the Oreo Hot Cocoa Mix. Swirling it around in the mug like I was aerating wine shows it has a viscosity that makes it difficult to tell water was used. I don’t know if that means thickening agents or I need to wash my dishes better.

But its consistency might also be the result of the amount of powder in each envelope that goes into the six ounces of liquid the instructions say to use. Each one has about 70 percent more than what’s in a Swiss Miss packet. While that creates a thicker beverage, the amount also makes it difficult to dissolve all the contents in hot liquid. Despite my vigorous stirring, many small powder clumps remained.

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The hot cocoa mix smells like the wafer from the popular cookie, but, in beverage form, it doesn’t make me think I’m drinking molten Oreo. But there’s a bit of the cookie’s dark cocoa flavor in the aftertaste. While it doesn’t fully taste like a chocolate Oreo wafer, it’s a darker, more decadent hot chocolate than I’m used to. It’s quite good.

I also made a cup with vanilla soy milk, but, despite it being creamier than the one made with water, it’s less pleasing because the non-dairy milk hides whatever Oreo flavor there is.

Like Scott Disick’s club appearances, I thought Oreo Hot Cocoa Mix was a desperate money grab. But while Mr. Disick has nothing to offer society, the Oreo Hot Cocoa Mix offers a warm, sweet beverage that’ll hit the spot when the temperatures start dropping.

YEAH!!!

Thanks to reader Robbie for sending me a box!

(Nutrition Facts – 1 packet – 150 calories, 30 calories from fat, 3.5 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 23 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.98
Size: 8-pack
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Smells like chocolate Oreo wafers. A step above Swiss Miss and Nestle hot cocoa mixes. Tastes really good when made with water.
Cons: Is Oreo Yoo-hoo next? Oreo is like a D-list celebrity that gets paid of club appearances. Oreo flavor disappears when made with vanilla soy milk.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Cookie Butter Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Cookie Butter Oreo Cookies

I begin this review with an urgent request.

Run, don’t walk, to your nearest grocery store/megamart/convenience store/bodega/Nabisco factory to get your hands on a pack of Cookie Butter Oreo Cookies.

And I’m not joking. After personally eating the first package I bought (and upon realizing that I probably needed at least one cookie to take a picture of for this review), I went to Target the very next day to procure another bag. Upon arriving, I found the Oreo shelf decimated, but managed to grab the last package on the shelf. Apologies in advance to anyone who shops at my local Target.

Nabisco’s newest limited edition Oreo flavor features two graham flavored cookies with cookie butter crème sandwiched between them. I’m going to assume that most TIB readers are well versed in the flavor of cookie butter, but here’s a crash course for those who haven’t: cookie butter is a spreadable concoction popularized by Trader Joe’s featuring the flavor of speculoos, a spiced shortcrust biscuit popular in Belgium, Germany, and the Netherlands. It’s good on waffles, toast, pretzels, and (obviously) cookies.

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When I opened my package, I was immediately overwhelmed by beige. While the packaging suggests that the cookies should have some definition against the darker brown cookie butter filling, they instead all blend together into an amorphous tan extravaganza. To be fair, the appearance doesn’t affect the taste, but it wouldn’t have hurt if the cookies got a little bit more time in the tanning bed before packaging.

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Similar to the cookie butter’s indiscernibility visually, the graham scent of the cookie masks most of the spicy cookie butter smell. The taste, however, is a different story. Per usual, the filling is the star of the show, with a strong gingerbread and molasses flavor evident throughout the cookie sandwich. The texture of the cookie butter is on-point as well, and when eaten independent of the cookie base you can really feel the familiar grit of the crushed speculoos biscuits mixed within the crème.

If there’s any area these Oreo cookies fall short in, it’s in the durability of the cookies themselves. With one bite, the cookies shatter quite noticeably and coat your cookie-eating-surface with a shower of graham sand. I’d imagine that the non-traditional graham cookie base has something to do with this, and it makes me wonder how these would have tasted with Oreo’s original chocolate cookie (*makes note for next visit to the Target cookie war zone*).

All in all, these cookies are excellent. While some previous limited edition Oreo flavors have fallen flat, these sandwiches reign supreme over the cookie kingdom. They’re speculoos-tacular!

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 10 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.).)

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 10.7 oz.
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: Burning off the Oreo cookies by running to the store. Amazing flavor. Visions of Franken-Oreo creations.
Cons: Needs a few more minutes out in the sun. That’s the way the cookie crumbles.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Apple Pie Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Apple Pie Oreo Cookies

I’ve run into the same problem almost every time I’ve had a particular discussion – what is the quintessential American food? Due to the melting pot nature of our country, everything seems to be imported, or even worse, STOLEN, from somewhere else.

The first food that comes to mind is the iconic burger, but nope, that one goes to Otto Kuase, in Hamburg, Germany. There’s New York’s pizza, taken from Italy, San Francisco’s burritos, adapted from Mexico, Los Angeles’ sushi, taken from Japan. You get the picture. All of our staples are a result of our acceptance, inclusion, (and colonization – yikes) of all types of cultures.

But apple pie, nothing is more American than apple pie, right? Wrong! Even apple pie, which is considered so American it was used as motivational propaganda for BOTH World Wars was brought over by the Dutch and Swedes during the 18th century. Can we do anything for ourselves?

Yes, yes we can. American’s can claim the Oreo, the shining sandwich star that has been the top dog of all factory cookies since 1912, as truly American. Since a burger Oreo would be pretty gross, next in line for a purely patriotic collab is apple pie, and that’s exactly what we got – apple pie creme in graham wafer cookies.

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The smell-o-vision on these Oreo is fantastic – immediately and unmistakably apple pie with sharp fruity apple and spicy sweet cinnamon jumping out of the package. Sometimes the golden wafers can overpower my initial sniff and taste impression of a new Oreo and I’m glad they went with graham here as I’m not getting any unnecessary vanilla sweetness, just pure apple power.

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Crunching into these circular slices of American hope and dreams is nothing short of a relaxing countryside morning full of perfection. The flavor starts with fresh, tart, juicy apple and quickly turns to cinnamon before finishing with smooth, golden, and slightly earthy graham notes. There are hints of caramel and a wonderful balance of sweetness that’s kept in check by the bursts of acidity brought by the apple. The overall profile is very true to the sweet-yet-tart nature of apples and is deliciously convincing as a cookie.

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The creme on this pie-eo is also softer and creamier than a lot of other varieties. It’s more like what I expect from a Trader Joe’s Joe-Joe. There’s a certain unctuous-ness that’s pleasant and draws immediate comparisons to gooey fresh apple pie filling. This Oreo isn’t tame, and it might not be for everyone, but I love it and think they nailed the execution.

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While last year’s Blueberry Pie was one of my favorites flavor-wise, it’s pretty hard to capture true blueberry flavor in a factory setting. These Apple Pie guys not only deliver a great sweet snack, but seamless flavor emulation to boot.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 70 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $3.29
Size: 10.7 oz.
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 10 out of 10
Pros: Big, authentic tart apple flavor. Slight cinnamon spiciness. Perfectly balanced sweetness. Mellow earthy graham finish. Soft fresh creme.
Cons: They don’t come a la mode.

REVIEW: Nestle Toll House Cookie of the Year Chocolate Fudge Pretzel Cookies

Nestle Toll House Cookie of the Year Chocolate Fudge Pretzel

Hey there, everyone.

For the second year in a row, I’m here to accept the Nestle Toll House Cookie of the Year Award. I’m not sure why the award committee keeps inviting me back to make these speeches on behalf of a cookie. I guess they must believe in the old adage, “you are what you eat.”

*crickets*

Yeesh. Tough crowd.

Let me be clear, folks. This isn’t an envelope mix-up, like that “La La Land” and “Moonlight” fiasco. Believe it or not, Nestle Toll House’s Chocolate Fudge Pretzel cookie dough really did beat out other contenders like PB&J Oreo for the Cookie of the Year award. Sorry, PB&J Oreo. Between you and me, I have a feeling that Nestle Toll House might have rigged this thing.

Nestle Toll House Cookie of the Year Chocolate Fudge Pretzel 2

I’ve got to give a quick shout-out to the crew on this production, also known as my oven and baking sheet. The 11-12 minutes it took to fully bake this project took longer than those “straight-to-plate” cookies, but these guys were nothing but professional.

Nestle Toll House Cookie of the Year Chocolate Fudge Pretzel 3

For all of you drama fans out there, Nestle Toll House Chocolate Fudge Pretzel cookies are set against a dark backdrop…of chocolate, that is. The chocolate cookie dough steals the show with a perfectly rich cocoa flavor. Like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, it’s the kind of role player that you can build a franchise around.

I was pleasantly surprised by the performance of the milk chocolate morsels. They add a sweeter, creamier element throughout. It can be hard to stand out when one of your co-stars is so dominant, but the milk chocolate morsels play off of the chocolate cookie dough really well.

Nestle Toll House Cookie of the Year Chocolate Fudge Pretzel 4

The pretzel pieces are a welcome addition to the cast, too. They’re salty, floury, and retain a good crunch. But if I’m being honest, they can be pretty erratic. Some cookies have a lot of them, and others hardly have any. It would be nice to see some consistency from those pretzel prima donnas.

Some of you in the audience might look at these Chocolate Fudge Pretzel cookies and think, “they could use something more, like caramel.” But I’ve got to disagree with you. Adding another ingredient here would be like Michael Bay’s use of explosions -— excessive.

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Once again, the Nestle Toll House Cookie of the Year is a real winner. The chocolate cookie dough, milk chocolate morsels, and pretzel pieces combine to make a formidable cast that puts on a great performance. Congratulations to the 2017 Cookie of the Year: Nestle Toll House Chocolate Fudge Pretzel Cookies.

I don’t know what the 2018 Cookie of the Year will be, but I do know this: it’ll be made by Nestle Toll House…

…and I’ll have to give yet another acceptance speech for a fake cookie award.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 cookie – 80 calories, 40 calories from fat, 4 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 1.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 65 milligrams of sodium, 11 grams of carbohydrates, 8 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 16 oz. (makes 24 cookies)
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Rich, fudgy cookie dough. Sweet milk chocolate morsels add nice variety. Crunchy pretzel pieces. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.
Cons: Still a totally made-up award, possibly rigged. Uneven distribution of pretzel pieces. Michael Bay.