Kimberly-Clark introduced this week Scott Naturals Tube-Free, a toilet paper roll without the inner cardboard roll.
While it’s great for the environment, if the TP technology is successful and other companies follow suit, it could equate to a drop in the number of times parents have to put on a fake smile and pretend to be proud of their child when they bring home a crappy craft project they made in school using toilet paper rolls, construction paper and glue.
The tubeless rolls are made using a “special winding process.” While the roll’s hole won’t be perfectly round, it will fit on any toilet paper spindle. But that’s just a small price to pay so that you’ll have fewer toilet paper animals, toilet paper flowers and toilet paper rockets to throw away when you have to make room for your child’s elbow macaroni art.
The Scott Naturals Tube-Free toilet paper is currently available at Walmart and Sam’s Club stores throughout the northeastern U.S.
For years, I thought Corn Flakes were made from rejected Frosted Flakes that weren’t sweet enough. I later found out that was not the case since Corn Flakes predates Frosted Flakes by about 50 years. But when I learned that, it made me wonder if Frosted Flakes were just rejected Corn Flakes that were too awesome.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, because Corn Flakes are almost flavorless, they’re the breakfast cereal equivalent of water. The cereal has been around for over 100 years, but to be honest, I’m not sure anyone has been eating them for the past 25 years. I certainly haven’t.
Whenever I go through the cereal aisle, I swear the Corn Flakes boxes are the only ones that seem as if they haven’t been touched. It looks like a Jenga puzzle that no one wants to face for fear of knocking all the other boxes down.
Ever since I became a big boy and began shopping on my own, I’ve never seen anyone purchase a box of Corn Flakes. I wouldn’t be surprised if all the boxes currently on shelves expired sometime in the late 1990s. I would find out, but that would involve me pulling a box from the shelf, which could cause all the other boxes to fall and make everyone in the aisle yell “Jenga” at me.
But someone must be purchasing boxes of Corn Flakes, either for feeding birds or so that they’ll have something cheap to donate that will allow them to say they participated in their company’s food drive.
Maybe I’ll eat some Corn Flakes for nostalgia’s sake, or maybe I’ll just eat Simply Cinnamon Corn Flakes and say close enough. Because I can eat through a box of Simply Cinnamon Corn Flakes, but I can’t do the same with regular Corn Flakes. It would be wasting Corn Flakes, since I haven’t successfully donated an opened box of cereal to a food drive.
I do think Simply Cinnamon Corn Flakes is a tasty step up from regular Corn Flakes. However, it’s best eaten dry instead of with milk. Just like milk has the ability to tone down the effects of spicy food, it also can subdue the cereal’s cinnamon flavor.
Simply Cinnamon Corn Flakes has a modest name. It really should be christened Thank Goodness Cinnamon Makes Corn Flakes Tolerable Corn Flakes. Not all the flakes are sprinkled with cinnamon, but there’s enough to make Corn Flakes taste less like an Amazon.com shipping box.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 cup/1.1 ounces – 120 calories, 0 calories from fat, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 45 milligrams of potassium, 27 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 6 grams of sugar, 20 grams of other carbohydrates, 2 grams of protein and a variety of vitamins and minerals.)
Item: Kellogg’s Simply Cinnamon Corn Flakes Price: $4.99 Size: 12 ounces Purchased at: Foodland Rating: 6 out of 10 Pros: A tasty step up from regular Corn Flakes. Fat free. Contains vitamins and minerals. Corn Flakes are great for donating to food drives. Great when eaten dry. Doesn’t taste like an Amazon.com shipping box. Frosted Flakes. Buying stuff from Amazon.com. Cons: Regular Corn Flakes. Cinnamon flavor is subdued in milk. Not all the flakes are sprinkled with cinnamon. Does get soggy quickly. Causing a mess at the grocery store and then having “Jenga” yelled at you. Food banks not accepting opened boxes.
Popeye’s has a sandwich called the Po’ Boy (poor boy) and it costs four dollars. If a poor boy is buying a four dollar sandwich, I know why he’s poor. He hasn’t heard of the McDonald’s Dollar Menu. (via An Immovable Feast)
I believe I have some pretty good smoothie-making skills.
Give me a blender, some fruit, a cup of soy milk, a spoonful of yogurt, a few ice cubes and a dancehall reggae beat, and I’ll create a refreshing smoothie that will make lady bits tingle. Although, I like using strawberries in my smoothies, so the tingling could also be the result of an allergic reaction.
My smoothies are so delicioso that people who taste them don’t call it a smoothie, they call it a smmm…mmm…ooooh…ooooh….th…whee. Although, again, because I use strawberries often in my smoothie recipes, some people might be saying it that way because their tongues are swollen.
It’s taken me months to develop my kick ass smoothie-making skills, so I find it upsetting that the Jamba All Natural Smoothie Kits attempt to turn any Joe Schmoe into a smoothie maestro. While they are easy to make, can the flavor of these smoothie kits make my lady bits tingle?
The Jamba All Natural Smoothie Kits come in three varieties based on classic Jamba Juice flavors:
Strawberries Wild – Strawberry and Banana with Non-Fat Yogurt Razzmatazz – Strawberry, Raspberry and Blueberry with Non-Fat Yogurt Mango-a-go-go – Mango and Pineapple with Non-Fat Yogurt.
Unfortunately, the kits don’t come with all the ingredients found in the versions that are blended at Jamba Juice locations. For example, the Razzmatazz pouch doesn’t contain the orange sherbet that the store-blended version has and the Mango-a-go-go doesn’t come with the opportunity for me to use my porn name, Steele Rockrod, when the cashier asks for a name to go with the order.
To make a smoothie from this kit, I just blended the contents of the pouch with eight ounces of apple juice. When everything was blended, I ended up with a 16-ounce serving that provided two servings of fruit.
All three varieties had consistencies similar to real Jamba Juice smoothies, but none of them made my lady bits tingle. Strawberries Wild and Razzmatazz were decent, but with both varieties the apple juice was the dominate flavor, and having to pick out seeds between my teeth was a problem. However, neither was an issue with the Mango-a-go-go and its combination of mango and pineapple was delicioso, but, again, it too didn’t make my lady bits tingle like my own smoothies do.
If on sale, a Jamba All Natural Smoothie Kit is cheaper than a Jamba Juice smoothie made in one of their brightly colored shops. It’s also better for you because it has less sugar. However, you can probably make a cheaper, healthier and better tasting smoothie, if you have excellent smoothie making skills, like mine.
(Nutrition Facts – 1/2 pouch/8 ounces prepared – Strawberries Wild – 110 calories, 05 calories from fat, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 20 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein, 100% vitamin C and 4% calcium. Razzmatazz – 110 calories, 0 calories from fat, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 15 milligrams of sodium, 14 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein, 100% vitamin C, 4% calcium and 2% iron. Mango-a-go-go – 120 calories, 0 calories from fat, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 15 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 15 grams of sugar, 1 gram of protein, 8% vitamin A, 100% vitamin C and 4% calcium.)
Item: Jamba All Natural Smoothies (Strawberries Wild, Razzmatazz & Mango-a-go-go) Price: $3.00 (on sale) Size: 8 ounces Purchased at: Safeway Rating: 6 out of 10 (Strawberries Wild) Rating: 6 out of 10 (Razzmatazz) Rating: 7 out of 10 (Mango-a-go-go) Pros: Easy to make. Mango-a-go-go was delicioso. Strawberries Wild and Razzmatazz were decent. Provides 100% vitamin C per serving. Provides a serving a fruit per eight ounces. Less sugar than Jamba Juice shop smoothies. My smoothie making skills. Cons: Didn’t make my lady bits tingle. Strawberry allergies. Apple juice overpowering other flavors. Getting seeds stuck between my teeth. Not having excellent smoothie making skills.
Silk, maker of soy products that are dairy-free, lactose-free, cholesterol-free and silk-free, is releasing a new holiday soy milk flavor this season alongside their current holiday flavors: Pumpkin Spice and Nog. The new Silk Mint Chocolate has the potential to be the best of three since I believe Silk knows how to make a mean chocolate soy milk.
While it sounds good, I’m not sure what holiday Silk Chocolate Mint represents. It’s easy to determine which holidays Silk’s two other flavors are for. Pumpkin Spice is for Halloween/Thanksgiving and Nog is for Christmas. Mint Chocolate could be a Christmas flavor, or it could honor National Chocolate Mint Day on February 19th.
A one cup serving contains 90 calories, 15 calories from fat, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 80 milligrams of sodium, 300 milligrams of potassium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, 3 grams of protein, and a bunch of vitamins and minerals.
Silk Mint Chocolate will be available for a limited time, hopefully until February 19th, and come in quart and half gallon sizes.