Pick Your Poison!!! Beverage Product Election!!!

It’s been awhile since I had a product election here at The Impulsive Buy, which allows you, the readers, to decide what product The Impulsive Buy reviews next. The product election also allows me to clean up my apartment which currently has empty bottles of products strewn all over the place.

Fortunately, they are mostly empty bottles of soda and water. However, if they were all empty bottles of beer, I could sing the “99 Bottles of Beer On The Wall” song or Fox could shoot an episode of Cops in my apartment.

Anyway, over the past few months I’ve tried various beverages. A few of them are sweet, one is pure, one is healthy, and one gets me so wasted that it will make me think the TV show Joey is actually funny.

In this product election, you will be able to choose from six “poisons”:

1. Oxygen Water

2. Island Fruit 7Up Plus

3. Mountain Dew MDX

4. XS Clearly Fruit Punch Sports Drink

5. Odwalla Superfood

6. Grey Goose La Vanille Vodka

The candidate with the most votes will be declared the winner. The winner will be reviewed and the other candidates will either be recycled or turned into spittoons.

To vote, just leave a comment for this post with your choice. Only one choice and vote per person.

I’ll be accepting votes until Sunday, December 25th. Shortly after the 25th, I’ll post the review of the winning product.

Now go vote like it’s the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards.

109 thoughts to “Pick Your Poison!!! Beverage Product Election!!!”

  1. Hmm…must I really pick one? I want to know how the MDX is, but a drunken review would mix things up nicely. Im’a go with the Grey Goose.

  2. i’m with dave – where’s the artfulness in a bottle of booze? but the superfood ain’t new. that shit’s been around forever

    the OXYGEN WATER is the perfect candidate becuz it’s 1. new and 2. ripe w/ potential for a philosophical rant on nothingness

  3. Odwalla Superfood, as it look and sounds like one of those things that “tastes great!” brings on “new energy and vitality!” and cleanses your system by causing you to “sh*t ungodly things that have been accumulating and impacting in your colon over the years.”

  4. I highly suggest reviewing all of the beverages by incorporating them as mixers with the vodka. This way we can all find out not only how good they are on the way down, but also how good they are on the way back up, presumably.

  5. as if my vote even matters at this point, definately i vote for the vodka, or as they spell it here, wodka. not only do i think it would be a much more entertaining review, it is the only product listed that is available to me. how exciting for me to read a review of a product i could actually go and buy!!!

  6. Grey Goose my friend…not only because I want to read a drunken interview, but because I want to see if it really makes you think that Joey is funny.

  7. Marvo, this is like one of those lineups at a police station where they ask the victims to pick out the person they think committed the crime, and they have 5 normal looking guys but one guy wearing a ski mask, loaded bazooka, nunchucks around his neck, and knives in his steel toed boots…

    Oh, by the way I vote for the vodka.

  8. My opinion(s) du jour, Marvo (and a healthy 2006 to you after a happy Christmas from probably the only Hanukkah-celebrating visitor here):

    Odwalla Superfood is really awful. Review it if you are so inclined, but be prepared!! I’ve had it on two separate occasions (being open-minded as I am) … and neither time was it at all palatable. And lest you forget, I’m an almost-vegan with a voracious appetite (for GOOD veg food and beverages). YuckEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE on that one…

    All the 7Up Plusses (Pluses?) are banal. Soporific, if you will.

    I vote for the Oxygen water!

    MERRY CHRISTMAS MARVO… and to all The Impulsive Buy readers/commenters!


  9. If I remember high school chemistry correctly, H20 (water) + O (oxygen) = H2O2 (hydrogen peroxide), which states explicitly on the bottle, “avoid swallowing.”

    I vote for the “Oxygen Water” because I am curious how they keep it from turning into peroxide. Maybe it will bleach your roots from the inside out.

  10. gotta go with the oxygen water since it’s the most pointless.

    GREY GOOSE? how could one waste that on a review? insanity.

  11. Tally as of now:
    O2- 11
    7up- 1 (XD, no wonder they are losing market share)
    MDX- 12 (my pick)
    Spt. dnk.- 0
    Odwalla- 19
    Vodka- 40

    Halfway through, I wondered what the point was. It is obvious that vodka won.

    MERRY CHRISTMAS, MARVO! (keep the “Christ” in “Christmas”)

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