In my parents’ attempts to slim me down so that they wouldn’t need to order husky children’s clothing from the Sears & Roebuck catalog, they fed me Raisin Bran. While other kids my age were chomping down on sugary cereals with names they would use in the future to order drugs, like Trix and Lucky Charms, I was consuming bran flakes that got soggy as soon as it was exposed to moisture with raisin that had a weird white coating.
My parents were never able to order regular sized clothing for me, thanks to the sodas and Otter Pops I consumed at my friend’s house down the street, but if the new Kellogg’s Raisin Bran Extra was introduced back then, I might’ve not been on the borderline of child obesity. This new cereal not only contains the obligatory crunchy bran flakes and plump raisins, it’s also made up of yogurt clusters, sweet cranberries, and almond slices. It’s like a hippie natural foods store in a box. A cup of it has 190 calories, 3 grams of fat, 140 milligrams of potassium, 7 grams of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 5 grams of protein.