Update: Click here to read our Rocky Road-ish review
With flavors like Karamel Sutra and Schweddy Balls, I thought Ben & Jerry’s new Limited Batch Rocky Road-ish honored pornstar Rocki Roads, but it does not. Not only does it not honor Ms. Roads, it also doesn’t have any chocolate ice cream, hence the name Rocky Road-ish.
Instead of chocolate ice cream, which is standard for the rocky road flavor, the limited edition ice cream is made up of toasted marshmallow ice cream with a toasted marshmallow swirl and fudge covered almonds. With that much marshmallow I’m surprised the creative folk at Ben & Jerry’s, who love pop culture references, didn’t call this ice cream Stay Nutt Marshmallow Man.
A 1/2 cup serving has 250 calories, 12 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 55 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 24 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.
Update: Click here to read our Limited Edition Doritos (Sour Cream and Onion & Salsa Rio) review
Do you remember the 1980s?
Don’t remember the 1980s because your parents hadn’t met until the 1990s? Well, back then we had Sour Cream and Onion Doritos and Salsa Rio Doritos. I didn’t get to try those flavors because my parents bought generic chips in black and white packages, which is also something you young whippersnappers don’t remember.
Oh, potato chips. I wish I could quit you, like I’ve stopped downloading freaky foreign internet porn and buying awful movies from the $5 DVD bin at Walmart with laughable titles like Mexican Werewolf In Texas and Hoochie Mama Drama. But you’re so difficult to shake, like a guy with vice grips for hands holding on to the roof of a speeding car while it goes around the NÃ¼rburgring in Germany.
I wish there was some kind of 12-step program to help me overcome my potato chip addiction because I have a weak soul that easily gives in to tater temptations. It’s so hard for my tongue to resist the equation: potato + hot oil = delicious. Once I pop, I can’t stop until half the bag is gone or until I get a sore stomach or until the bag is taken away from me using force.
It wouldn’t be so bad if potato chips had less fat. Although folks have tried to make low-fat potato chips using the synthetic oil, Olestra. However, for some reason people didn’t care for its possible anal leakage side effect.
A one ounce serving of Lays classic potato chips has 10 grams of fat, which is 16 percent of our daily value. So if I ate half a bag of Lays potato chips in one sitting, while watching a NCIS marathon on the USA Network, I would have consumed 60 grams of fat or 96 percent of my daily value. Oh, if only there was a way I could eat half a bag of potato chips without the guilt and the need to eat raw vegetables for the rest of the day to compensate for the potato chips.
Oh wait, it looks like Kettle Foods might have something with their Kettle Brand 40% Reduced Fat Sea Salt Potato Chips.
How did Kettle Brands make these chips have less fat? Don’t know and don’t care, unless it involves Olestra or a deal with the Devil. But it’s not the ingredients since it’s as simple of a list as their regular Sea Salt potato chips — potatoes, safflower and/or sunflower oil, and sea salt. It probably involves something that includes the word “proprietary” in its name.
As a fan of regular Kettle Brand Sea Salt potato chips, I’m quite familiar with its flavor. Heck, I’m such as fan that just thinking about them makes my mouth water and my hands shake. God, I need a potato chip fix right now. So does this reduced fat version taste just as good as the full fat version, which has 9 grams of fat per serving? Not quite. Does it taste good for a 40% reduced fat potato chip? Most definitely.
(Sidenote: The 40% is determined by comparing these chips with “regular potato chips” (i.e. Lays potato chips) and not their own regular sea salt potato chips.)
The chip’s potato flavor isn’t as robust as the regular version, but it does have the same delightful crunch. It seems Kettle Foods tries to make up for the slight loss of flavor due to the reduction in fat by including 45 milligrams more sodium per serving than the regular stuff, but I don’t think it’s saltier. However, the flavor difference is slight enough that I think if you emptied a bag into a bowl and left it out for your guests, no one would be any the wiser. After all, not everyone’s tongue and gut fat is as familiar with Kettle Brand Sea Salt potato chips as mine.
The Kettle Brand 40% Reduced Fat Sea Salt Potato Chips are pretty gosh darn good and I’ll probably end up replacing the regular stuff with it so that I can go on a potato chip bender with less guilt.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 ounce/about 13 chips – 130 calories, 50 calories from fat, 6 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 4.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 480 milligrams of potassium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 0 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)
Item: Kettle Brand 40% Reduced Fat Sea Salt Potato Chips Price: $4.00 (on sale) Size: 8 ounces Purchased at: Safeway Rating: 8 out of 10 Pros: Pretty damn good for 40% reduced fat potato chips. 40% less fat than “regular potato chips.” Less calories than Kettle Brand Sea Salt potato chips. Less guilty. No preservatives. Non-GMO ingredients. Gluten free. Potato + hot oil = delicious. Cons: Flavor isn’t as robust as the regular stuff, but most won’t notice. My potato chip addiction. More sodium than the regular stuff. More expensive than “regular potato chips.” Some of the movies found in the $5 DVD bin at Walmart.
I don’t eat breakfast on-the-go very often, usually opting for a simple bowl of cereal and some OJ at the kitchen table with my kids. Very Norman Rockwell. But on rare occasions — like if between the baby and me it’s been a 3-diaper-change morning, or one where I have to shave, put the garbage out, AND explain why you can wear the sparkle shoes or the pink shoes but not the pink sparkle shoes — well, I might have to skip the suburban flakes and grab something on the way. When that happens, it’s always Dunkin’ Donuts and I invariably get the same thing: a bismark, and a chocolate glazed (January-August) or pumpkin donut (September-December). This does not change, because while there are other donuts I like, those are the best. Feel free to disagree (everyone should take up a lost cause once in their life), but it should help you understand why I recently confused myself by walking into DD and not only not getting my usual order, but not getting a breakfast food whatsoever.
That is, of course, due to DD’s latest offering, the Texas Toast Grilled Cheese. Sort of a lunchtime offshoot of the recent Big N’ Toasty Breakfast Sandwich, your first thought on seeing one might be that it looks like they took the BN’T and stripped out the bacon and eggs. And… there would be a lot of truth to that, as it does play sort of the basic model compared to the fully loaded BN’T. To be specific, the new sandwich is two thick pieces of Texas toast with two slices of American cheese and one slice of cheddar in between. The whole thing is ironically oven toasted rather than grilled, served hot (or in my case, kinda warm).
Any good grilled cheese sandwich obviously lives or dies by the cheese. If you were hoping the Double D was going to get esoteric with their diary selection, guess again — American and cheddar are about the most predictable options they could’ve gone with. The other side of that coin is that those are the most popular cheeses because they’re both really good. However, I still think DD might’ve increased this sandwich’s mass appeal by giving us a few options to choose from, like Monterey Jack or Swiss. But they didn’t, so you’ll get American and cheddar and like it. And I did, mostly. The cheddar had just a bit of kick to it, slightly sharp, which I like in a cheddar. But it was mostly overwhelmed by the decent but standard American cheese, no doubt due to the 2:1 ratio. Both kinds were melted well, another key component of any successful grilled cheese. Overall, my impression of the cheeses was that they’re pretty good, but not exactly lighting the world on fire.
Ironically, my favorite part might’ve been what’s traditionally the most boring aspect of a sandwich, namely the bread. Texas toast is one of those foods that’s fantastic when done well but really disappointing if it’s either under-toasted or burned. Fortunately mine was just the right texture, toasted perfectly so that it was soft enough to easily dig into, but with enough crunch to feel satisfying. It also tasted buttery, another must-have.
But that’s really it, because the cheese and the bread are the only two components of the sandwich. Apparently it can be customized with bacon or ham, but DD might be shooting themselves in the foot by not better advertising that — I didn’t see any such option listed on the menu and my server didn’t offer it. Which is a shame — I would’ve been willing to throw in a few more cents or a saucy wink in exchange for meat, because that’s the kind of carniv-whore I am. Other than the missing pork, I didn’t mind too much because I’m a sandwich minimalist, but those who like to indulge in things like “pickles” and “condiments” and “fixins” will no doubt be left wanting worse than my high school girlfriend. You know, when she didn’t get into the college she wanted. Obviously.
Finally, not for nothing, but the fat and sodium content are more worrisome than my longstanding crush on Erin Esurance. (Whatever, I’m not the only one. The internet told me so!) The sandwich is pretty filling, but unless it’s the only thing you’re eating for lunch, it could easily have you packing on the ell-bees. I know, unlike the rest of Dunkin’ Donuts’ fare, but still. Moderation is advised.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 sandwich – 510 calories, 270 calories from fat, 30 grams of fat, 13 grams of saturated fat, 940 milligrams of sodium, 41 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of sugar, and 18 grams of protein)
Item: Dunkin’ Donuts Texas Toast Grilled Cheese Sandwich Price: $2.99 Size: 1 sandwich Purchased at: Dunkin’ Donuts Rating: 6 out of 10 Pros: Breaking out of your routine. A little bite to the cheddar. Melty, melty, melty. Crunchy Texas toast. Buttery flavor. Fairly filling. Ability to add meat. Cons: Not publicizing the ability to add meat. High fat and sodium content. Lacking in the ingredients department. No additional cheese selections. I can make this exact sandwich in my kitchen in 5 minutes.