REVIEW: Wendy’s Berry Burst Chicken Salad

Wendy s Berry Burst Chicken Salad

As a marketing writer for a semi-large organization, and as a perpetual bullshitter, I tend to appreciate the subtle ability of words to transform the same old thing into something completely different.

Let’s put our cards on the table: a straight description doesn’t work anymore. Nobody wants what is. Everyone wants what is ideal.

Case in point, what was the Wendy’s Berry Almond Chicken Salad seven years ago became the Summer Berry Chicken Salad two years ago and now has morphed into the Berry Burst Chicken Salad.

Granted, there are some slight variations, but who actually remembers a slight switcheroo in a cheese or a berry or a dressing?

For what it’s worth, what is basically the same salad from 2011 and 2016 is still delicious. Although, perhaps to stay consistent with the times, we should say it’s still delicious AF. Regardless, the salad has that rare ability to make you stop and say, “Wait, that came from Wendy’s?

Wendy s Berry Burst Chicken Salad 4

If you still haven’t had Wendy’s revamped grilled chicken, which debuted two years ago, get with the times, man. It’s juicy, succulent, and it has flavor like something grilled on one of those short-season Food Network summer grilling shows. I can’t believe I just said that about white meat. Anyways, the chicken is more than passable and a few notches above any pre-packed salad you’d find in the grocery store.

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I was really impressed with the berries, particularly the strawberries, which had a slightly macerated taste and texture that was sweet without being cloying or overripe. The blueberries were by and large plump and ripe, their modest sweetness pairing nicely against the salty feta cheese. Both the cheese and the smoky, crunchy almonds, give the salad a hearty feel — perhaps even a burst.

The biggest drawbacks are the dressing and the amount of lettuce. The sweetness of the dressing tends to be a little too much with the berries. It’s like putting ketchup on my ketchup flavored potato chips -— both delicious, less so together. As for the lettuce, I feel like Elaine Benes might be cool with it, but when I’m fairly full and there’s still a forest staring back at me, sans chicken and berries, the ratio is a little off.

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I told myself I wasn’t going to look at the past reviews of Wendy’s Chicken/Almond/Berry salad combos when scoring the Berry Burst Chicken Salad. Well, lo and behold I have no self-control and saw past scores of 8 and 9. Given that nothing much has changed, but more importantly, given that this is still a great salad, a 9 seems more than appropriate.

(Nutrition Facts – Full size – 460 calories, 17 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 105 milligrams of cholesterol, 1090 milligrams of sodium, 41 grams of carbohydrates, 29 grams of sugar, 7 grams of fiber, and 41 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $6.79
Size: Full size
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: “Lots of fresh strawberries and blueberries” — literally ripped this line from the 2011 review, which is still applicable. Grilled chicken is a step above 2011 version. Well composed salad with super fresh ingredients. Crunchy almonds and feta cheese create good contrasts in flavors and textures.
Cons: Raspberry vinaigrette is like putting ketchup on ketchup potato chips. A little too much greenery. Lingering debate over the connotation of “chicken salad” vs. “salad with chicken.”

QUICK REVIEW: Milka Double Chocolate Oreo Candy Bar

Milka Double Chocolate Oreo Chocolate Candy Bar

What is it?

The Milka Double Chocolate Oreo Candy Bar features bits of Oreo cookies in chocolate crème and covered in European Milka chocolate.

So, it’s chocolate inside of chocolate covered in even more chocolate. I’m guessing a person’s opinion on the bar will depend on two things: do they believe there is such a thing as “too chocolatey” and just how fancy in this European candy anyway?

How is it?

Milka Double Chocolate Oreo Chocolate Candy Bar 2

As expected, this bar is very chocolate-forward. There’s a surprisingly sharp dark chocolate bite, but as a fan of the stuff, it isn’t unwelcome. The crème adds to the choco-overload nature of the bar, with a pleasing smooth texture. At least, it would be smooth if not for the Oreo bits. They’re too small to add any real textural interest, instead contributing a gritty mouthfeel. If there’s anything special about the Milka chocolate, it’s lost in the other elements.

This bar is missing balance. The other Oreo candy bars, cookies & crème and mint, succeed because the flavored crème balance the chocolate. Oreo cookies work for the same reason (Keep your Double Stuf. I need the perfect cookie-to-crème ratio of the original). The crème here doesn’t offer any complimentary flavor, so I’m left thinking I’d be better off just eating a plain chocolate bar for my fix. Or an Oreo.

Is there anything else I need to know?

Milka Double Chocolate Oreo Chocolate Candy Bar 4

How do you like to eat your chocolate? Do you chomp down on it with wild abandon, munching it in an attempt to shove as much of it in your face in as short a time as possible? Or do you like to let it slowly melt in your mouth, luxuriating in the silken texture as your body heat slowly releases the subtle flavors and aromas of your single source free trade organic bar?

I tried both ways, and this is a bar made for munching. The problem is that single note chocolate flavor doesn’t offer enough excitement as compared to other candy bars.

Conclusion:

The Milka Double Chocolate Oreo Candy Bar is missing the balance of the other Oreo candy bars, and of the Oreo cookie itself. It’s a decent product that won’t totally satisfy anyone.

Purchased Price: $1.50
Size: 3.52 oz. bar
Purchased at:
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (5 pieces) 190 calories, 12 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 mg milligrams of cholesterol, 65 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 1 grams of fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Sonic Pickle Juice Snow Cone Slush

Sonic Pickle Juice Snow Cone Slush

Pickles.

They’re just one of those things that are inherently funny. They don’t even have to do anything; just the fact that they exist is amusing. (Kind of like cats, noses, and octopuses.)

One thing (out of many) that makes them funny is their polarizing qualities. Pickle is one of the food fads du jour, but plenty of people can’t stand them.

I like pickles, but I’m no fanatic (I like to get pickle products mostly to gross out my pickle-hating friends). I think the cukes’ silliness is the main reason they’re having their heyday. Because of this, I think Sonic’s new Pickle Juice Snow Cone Slush is primarily a marketing gimmick to make people laugh.

I don’t eat in my car, so I went to a Sonic with a dining area. When I walked in, I said to the cashier, “Can I get a…” and she finished my sentence: “Pickle slush?” She thought I chose small because I wasn’t a risk taker, but the fact is that I just can’t eat that much slushiness.

I told her I was trying it for this review, and she asked if I was going to put in a pickle spear, instead of a decorative umbrella. I was disappointed when she said they didn’t actually offer pickle spears with the drink. What a missed opportunity, Sonic!

Sonic Pickle Juice Snow Cone Slush 2

When I took my first sip, I thought, “Yep. That’s totally pickle juice.” It’s exactly what you would expect to find in a jar of dill pickles—a tart, acidic flavor.

But by my second sip, I thought, “Yep. That’s totally a Sonic slush.” See, even though dill pickles are a savory food, this is still a sugary slush. I have had shaved ice that had pickle juice flavoring, and it was just like pure pickle juice, not sweet at all. But Sonic’s version is just as sweet (or almost as sweet) as their other flavors. I’ve heard of serious athletes using pickle juice as a recovery drink, but this slush is no health food.

Personally, I enjoyed it, and I liked it more than I probably would have if it weren’t sweet. The dill and the sweetness didn’t clash as much as you might expect. It was refreshing.

Sonic Pickle Juice Snow Cone Slush 3

I got a cheeseburger with my slush, and since there were no actual pickles in the slush, I transferred a couple of pickle slices to the drink. But I don’t recommend it; the sweetness didn’t match the real pickles, and I don’t like chewing cold things.

I can’t help wondering who this is for. If you don’t like pickles or pickle juice, then you won’t like it. And if you love pickle juice, you will be disappointed that it’s so sugary. I guess it’s for people who are somewhat apathetic about pickles, who like sweet slushes, and who enjoy trying weird foods.

I might get it again, but only because of its utter weirdness. It’s not any better than the other Sonic flavors.

(Nutrition Facts – Not listed on Sonic’s website, but a small Slush without any flavoring contains: 180 calories, 0 calories from fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 grams of cholesterol, 30 grams of sodium, 48 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 48 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $1.49
Size: Small
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Sweet and refreshing. Dill flavor doesn’t clash with the slush as much as you might expect. Pickles are hilarious.
Cons: Not a health food. Doesn’t come with pickles. Who is it for, exactly?

QUICK REVIEW: Quaker Life Strawberry Cereal

Quaker Life Strawberry Cereal

What is it?

Quaker has added a new member of the Life family, joining Original, Cinnamon, Vanilla, Pumpkin Spice, Gingerbread, and (discontinued?) Maple and Brown Sugar. Strawberry Life is the only fruit-flavored version out there currently. Cinnamon Life is my all-time favorite cereal, so I was interested to see how this variation would stack up.

How is it?

Quaker Life Strawberry Cereal 2

When I tried a piece dry, it reminded me of Berry Berry Kix, a cereal I haven’t had in decades. But who eats Life dry?

As I ate the cereal doused in milk, I got the true experience, but it’s not much of an experience. For some of the bites, I could hardly taste the strawberry. It was just like Original Life. On other bites, I could taste the berry, but it had an artificial, almost chemical flavor, which is odd since it only uses natural flavors.

Quaker Life Strawberry Cereal 3

I was happy to finish my bowl(s) of this cereal, but only because of the standard flavor and texture of Life. The strawberry doesn’t do anything for me.

Quaker Life Strawberry Cereal 4

I did try real strawberries in the cereal, but personally I didn’t care for the combination.

Is there anything else I need to know?

I have a few lingering questions. Why do they use yellow food coloring for a strawberry-inspired cereal that is drab anyway? Like, what’s the point? And why is this new product being marketed with a minor character from a threequel that I predict will be forgettable?

Conclusion:

I doubt I will ever buy this cereal again —- not because it’s terrible, but just because it doesn’t match its predecessors. When I go to the cereal aisle and see my beloved Cinnamon Life smiling at me, I have no need for Strawberry. Even Original is better than this version.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 18 oz. box
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 3/4 cup (32 grams) – 120 calories, 15 calories from fat, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 85 milligrams of potassium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of dietary fiber, 6 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Post Peanut Butter & Cocoa Pebbles Cereal

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal

Conclusion: Post’s Peanut Butter & Cocoa Pebbles could be your new favorite cereal. In law school, I was taught a way of legal writing that begins with the conclusion, follows with supporting evidence, and then restates the conclusion.

There’s my conclusion. Now, here’s my supporting evidence…

Over the past few months, I transitioned to a vegan diet for various reasons. Many assume that a vegan diet is a “healthy” one, but those of us who enjoy junk food know there’s a lot of food that people think is “healthy,” but isn’t.

Potato chips, hard candy, popsicles, soda, beer…often, these are vegan. One of my thrills of eating junk food, however, is finding that stereotypical “junk food” that is closer to “healthy” than many of its so-called “healthy” competitors. Turns out Post’s Peanut Butter & Cocoa Pebbles is a boxful of vegan joy and it’s actually not too bad for you either. Vegans don’t have to be stuck with granola unless they want to be.

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal 2

Right out of the box, the Pebbles smelled like cocoa butter with a hint of nuts, not clearly peanuts, but nutty. I snacked on a handful while I waited for my unsweetened almond milk to soak into the pebbles. In their dry state, they are crispy and taste like what I imagine a freeze-dried Reese’s Cup Rice Krispie treat would taste like. After waiting about 30 seconds, I dug in.

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal 3

Each spoonful was a delight. The peanut butter and cocoa flavors were balanced, but notable, in each bite. The peanut butter flavor was authentic, not artificial tasting. The cocoa flavor was light and reminiscent of chocolate milk. I poured myself another bowl. Bowl 2 was equally as satisfying as Bowl 1. Rinse and repeat.

The next morning, I tried the cereal with unsweetened oat milk to test whether the nuttiness of the almond milk made a difference in the overall flavor. There was little difference between the cereal with the almond milk and the cereal with the oat milk. The cereal held up well in both and I suspect it would do equally well in any milk. It also held up well after three minutes of unintentional soak time, only slightly less crispy, but definitely not soggy.

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal 4

I’m not a fan of drinking milk, so I rarely drink the leftover milk from cereal. With this cereal, I just kept adding more cereal to my milk until there was no more milk left. However, the last sip of milk remaining was slurp-worthy, not too sweet, nor with too much disintegrated cereal debris.

Conclusion: Go ahead, eat five bowlsful while watching cartoons on Netflix (Inspector Gadget, anyone?) Or, try topping your (vegan) yogurt or ice cream with the leftover cereal that always manages to end up at the bottom of the box. Any way you eat this, I’m sure you will enjoy it.

(Editor’s Note: A Post Cereals representative tells me that this currently is not gluten-free.)

(Nutrition Facts – 3/4 cup serving – 120 calories, 2.5 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 24 grams of carbohydrates, 9 grams of sugars, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $3.48
Size: 20 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 10 out of 10
Pros: Vegan. Low sugar for a “sugary” cereal. Versatile snack. Real peanut butter and cocoa ingredients.
Cons: Cartoons aren’t the same as they used to be.