REVIEW: Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard

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Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Top

What is the Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard?

It’s Dairy Queen’s Blizzard of the Month for February, and it features red velvet cake pieces and cream cheese icing with, as always, vanilla soft serve. This is not technically new, as DQ has offered it in February a few times in the past. But it’s been five years since the last time it was available, according to our handy-dandy Blizzard of the Month List.

How is it?

Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Sign

We all know better than to expect fast food to actually look like it does in a commercial or promotional photo, but the difference here was pretty glaring. Based on the window sign at DQ (and the name of this Blizzard), I was expecting it to be, you know, red. What I got was basically white with small red freckles and a tinge of reddish-pink. I think it was partly a blending issue, as the population of cake pieces increased dramatically as I tunneled downward, but even then, the reddish color only increased modestly.

I’m also not sure enough of the cake pieces were pulverized in the blending process to spread their redness around. A better blending might have made it slightly closer to the color on the window sign but still far from the vibrant red-pink color shown on the DQ website.

Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Spoon

Of course, the more important issue is how it tastes, and the flavor of this one really makes up for the underwhelming appearance. For one thing, it’s different than most Blizzards, with no chocolate overload or extreme sweetness. The red velvet cake delivers a subtle chocolatey flavor that seems a bit more complex than just “regular chocolate,” and the cream cheese brings a sweet creaminess that pairs nicely. This won’t blow away your taste buds with a powerful burst of flavor, but it should make them happy.

Anything else you need to know?

I needed to know exactly what red velvet cake is because, to be honest, I was not exactly sure. I’ve had it many times, and I liked it, because, duh, it’s cake. But I’m not sure I could really describe what it tastes like. I’m still not really sure.

Some will claim that it’s just chocolate cake with red food coloring, but “real” red velvet cake generally includes cocoa, buttermilk, and vinegar, which together provide the reddish hue through a chemical reaction. Scanning the ingredients on the DQ website, it appears this red velvet cake is closer to a red-colored chocolate cake. It does contain cocoa, but there is no mention of buttermilk or vinegar.

Dairy Queen Red Velvet Cake Blizzard Cake Closeup

As you can see from a cross-section of a piece, it’s not exactly light and fluffy like you might imagine for cake; it’s really more the consistency of a red velvet brownie. So if you are a red velvet cake purist, this might not be for you.

Conclusion:

I’m always down for a Blizzard that is not some rehashed combination of chocolate, fudge, and Oreo, and this, well, it takes the cake for being different. It’s not the best Blizzard I’ve had, but it stands out as being unique for having two flavors not found in any other versions I can recall, and together they taste excellent. So this is a perfect treat to share with your significant (or even insignificant) other on Valentine’s Day or any time before it disappears for another five years.

Purchased Price: $4.79
Size: Medium
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Medium) 910 calories, 37 grams of fat, 19 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 75 milligrams of cholesterol, 500 milligrams of sodium, 128 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 90 grams of sugar, and 17 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Pizza Hut Detroit-Style Double Pepperoni Pizza

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Pizza Hut Detroit Style Double Pepperoni Pizza Whole

What is the Pizza Hut Detroit-Style Double Pepperoni Pizza?

It’s a Detroit-style deep-dish pizza topped with classic pepperoni, Pizza Hut’s new crispy cupped pepperoni, a layer of cheese that goes all the way to the edge of a crispy, caramelized crust, and two streaks of the chain’s new vine-ripened tomato sauce.

How is it?

Well, it tastes like a pepperoni pizza.

Although some of its flavors are slightly different than any of The Hut’s other pepperoni-topped offerings because of the smaller pepperoni and the sauce’s position.

Pizza Hut Detroit Style Double Pepperoni Pizza Two Pepperoni

The cup pepperoni slices are noticeably spicier than the standard flat pepperoni. Those that aren’t drenched with sauce also provide some crispiness. As for the new sauce, being on top of everything makes its flavors stand out. It’s sweet, but even more acidic. Its placement can be troublesome because there isn’t any sauce under the cheese, unlike most pizzas. So there’s a good chance you might take bites that are sauce-less, which taste okay but aren’t optimal.

Pizza Hut Detroit Style Double Pepperoni Pizza Slice Edges

Just like its box says, the edges are crispy and cheesy, and the inner crust is light and airy. But the crust, when tasted on its own, is bland. Thankfully the toppings layer extends to the edges, so there’s no honkin’ huge flavorless end crust to deal with.

Anything else you need to know?

I hate it when pizza forces me to do homework.

It’s not the “you won’t get any pizza until you finish your homework” forcing. With this Detroit-style Double Pepperoni Pizza, it’s the “I have to fact check whether the pizza is supposed to look that way” forcing. Because I’ve never seen a pizza with two thick tomato sauce streaks painted on it.

After seeing that, I was off to Google to find out if Detroit-style deep-dish pizzas are really like that and because I’m using Google, to ensure I will see pizza-related advertisements on every website I visit for the next few weeks.

Well, it turns out my pizza geography knowledge is lacking.

Pizza Hut Detroit Style Double Pepperoni Pizza Box

But why is the sauce only on top? According to the box, it’s there to keep the crust light and airy. But I find that answer to be a bit strange because Pizza Hut’s Pan Pizza doesn’t need the sauce to be on top of everything to maintain its soft and fluffy crust, but I digress.

Conclusion:

This Detroit-Style Double Pepperoni Pizza is a slightly different tasting pepperoni pizza from Pizza Hut. It’s not better than the standard Pizza Hut pizza. It’s also not worse. But it does look like what would happen if we told an extraterrestrial being visiting the Earth for the first time the components of a pizza and have it make one, but not tell it the order they usually go on top of each other.

Purchased Price: $13.99*
Size: N/A
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 slice) 330 calories, 17 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 40 milligrams of cholesterol, 720 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 2 grams of sugar, and 14 grams of protein.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.

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REVIEW: KFC Chicken Sandwich (2021)

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KFC Chicken Sandwich 2021 Wrapper

Here in Kansas City, we don’t get many cool new things.

We got a great—like-once-in-a-lifetime-level-great—quarterback a few years ago, but that was after decades of mistakes, cast-offs, and retreads. We have a few of those places where people throw axes, all paint the same picture, or play golf in a giant net, but we only got them after they’d been elsewhere for years.

So imagine my joy when I learned Kansas City was one of the select cities receiving a sneak-peek of KFC’s new chicken sandwich. We are in, after all, the Golden Age of Chicken Sandwiches, and what better place to unveil a new version of a breaded bird on a bun than the grandfather of fast food fried chicken, KFC.

Then imagine my disappointment when I got my sandwich.

KFC Chicken Sandwich 2021 Whole

KFC describes it as “… (a) quarter-pound, all-white meat, double-breaded, Extra Crispy chicken breast filet… freshly-toasted buttery brioche bun, crispier, thicker pickles, and the perfect amount of the Colonel’s real mayo or spicy sauce.”

KFC Chicken Sandwich 2021 Top

KFC Chicken Sandwich 2021 Split

What I got was a piece of chicken only a smidge bigger than a deck of playing cards. Further disappointingly, it even seemed absent the Colonel’s traditional 11 herbs and spices. I tasted salt and dry, chewy chicken breast. The “double-breading” made no impact whatsoever, though there was plenty of it (sans chicken, mind you). Nor did the pickles, which were limp and thin, much closer to McDonald’s pickles than anything I was expecting.

The brioche bun seemed like it had the potential to be the best part of the sandwich — which, let’s just let that sink in for a moment — but half of the bottom half was stale. How do you get half of a half of a stale bun, you ask? So do I. Let me know if you have an answer. The mayo was tangy and good — quintessentially KFC mayo — but the best mayo in the world couldn’t save this wreck of a sandwich.

Look, I like KFC. I like its original chicken and the Extra Crispy variety. I love its Nashville Hot Chicken tenders. If I could only choose Popeyes or KFC for the rest of my life, I’d have a hard time deciding; it’d be a tossup, honestly. But not when it comes to their signature sandwiches, oh no.

If Popeyes’ sandwich is a Picasso, KFC’s offering is a 3rd grader writing a swear word in the dirt on the back window of his mom’s minivan. This chicken sandwich isn’t even in the same league as Church’s, frankly. It’s seriously weird that KFC is proud of this.

In 2018, KFC unveiled a new chicken sandwich called “The Crispy Colonel.” For the life of me, I cannot figure out how this sandwich differs. In fact, the couple of Crispy Colonel’s I’ve had have been considerably better than whatever this abomination was. Back to the test kitchen, KFC.

KFC Chicken Sandwich 2021 Take 2 Split

Due to the sandwich’s abysmal initial showing, my esteemed editor kindly asked that I try another, you know, to assure that the first one wasn’t an aberration. And the verdict? It wasn’t. While the chicken breast on this one was meatier than the first, it was no juicer or more flavorful. (In fact, the extra size maybe gave it more of a chance to be drier while also amplifying how bland it is.)

KFC Chicken Sandwich 2021 Take 2 PIckles

The pickles still weren’t crispy, and the bun on this one — while fresher — certainly wasn’t “buttery” as the copy proclaims. This sandwich is still a huge disappointment, and you’d do better to stick with Popeyes. Or Chick-fil-A. Or Wendy’s. Or Church’s. Or Sonic. (Hey, I think McDonald’s has a new chicken sandwich coming out soon, too!)

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: N/A
Rating: 3 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 650 calories, 35 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 90 milligrams of cholesterol, 1260 milligrams of sodium, 49 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 6 grams of total sugars, and 34 grams of protein.

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REVIEW: Dunkin’ Midnight Coffee

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Dunkin Midnight Coffee Cup

What is Dunkin’ Midnight Coffee?

In accordance with the present times, Dunkin’ has decided to get a little dark – darker than it’s ever gone before, in fact, with the release of the new Midnight Coffee.

How is it?

I almost always opt for the dark roast when I order my cold brews on the app, but that option seemed to disappear in the past month or so. Thankfully Dunkin’ has decided to go even darker with its new Midnight blend.

I’m just gonna say it – Dunkin’s regular base coffee stinks.

But it is a gateway to a better beverage. If you love it, more power to ya, but I can’t fathom drinking it black. It’s just not that good. 4 out of 10.

Dunkin Midnight Coffee Comparison

To reinforce my opinion, I tried a hot Midnight coffee against Dunkin’s regular roast, and it was (mid)night and day. Of all the crazy sugar bombs Dunkin’ drops monthly, this might be the most important menu addition in years.

Ok, I’m being dramatic. But for a dark roast fan like myself, this is big.

Dunkin Midnight Coffee Mug

Midnight is a rich, darker blend that leans more towards espresso with big notes of bitter dark chocolate.

I found the taste to be softer and dryer than the standard, with a much more pleasant aftertaste. It made the regular coffee sour in comparison.

Anything else you need to know?

After taking a few sips of the straight black coffees, I added oat milk, which is the G.O.A.T. milk, not be confused with goat milk, which is a goat’s milk.

Again, Midnight was considerably better. The oat milk’s creaminess enhanced the dark chocolate notes slightly and left a chocolate-covered espresso bean flavor in its wake.

Conclusion:

Dunkin Midnight Coffee Mug

Look, I’ll probably never order a hot black Midnight coffee again if I’m honest, but that doesn’t change the fact that Dunkin’ finally has a coffee I would drink black. It’s not hard to mask the flavor of Dunkin’s base roast, but I’m still thrilled it’s added a new starting point to my coffee order.

Dunkin’ better expand Midnight into the iced side of the menu because I see no reason to ever go back. If you’re a dark roast coffee drinker, this is definitely for you.

Purchased Price: $1.87
Size: Small
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Not available on website.

REVIEW: Starbucks Pistachio Latte

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Starbucks Pistachio Latte Cup

What is the Starbucks Pistachio Latte?

The new Starbucks Pistachio Latte has a typical latte base – steamed milk and espresso – with pistachio sauce and a salted brown butter topping.

How is it?

2021, you are off to an amazing start on the coffee front. I don’t think I could love the Pistachio Latte any more!

At first sip, there was a mellow, not overly sweet nuttiness, thanks to the pistachio sauce, which I’m looking forward to trying in some of my other favorite beverages. (Hint, Starbucks: Please keep this sauce forever!) While in reality I was about to go to work, I would have preferred to drink it during a cozy afternoon reading by the fire.

Starbucks Pistachio Latte Top

I’m really impressed with the pistachio sauce – I think Starbucks hit the nail on the head with a flavor that pairs nicely with the milk in the latte. It’s warm, filling, and has just the right amount of flavor. It reminded me slightly of a flat white. Even though traditional flat whites don’t have a sauce or syrup, the Pistachio Latte was reminiscent of the warm, just a tiny bit creaminess of a flat white.

Lastly, I found the flavor to be apparent down to the last drop.

Anything else you need to know?

The *only* thing that fell a bit flat for me and why I gave the rating I did was the salted brown butter topping. I typically find that these toppings sink right into the hot drinks and you can’t really taste it. This was the case with the Pistachio Latte.

Conclusion:

Go. Try. This. Latte. I can’t wait to get it again! Here’s to hoping it sticks around beyond winter.

Purchased Price: $4.65
Size: Grande
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 230 calories, 6 grams of total fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 230 milligrams of sodium, 35 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 33 grams of total sugars, 9 grams of protein, and 75 milligrams of caffeine.

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