REVIEW: Post Hostess Donettes Cereal

Post Hostess Donettes Cereal

Hitting shelves just in time to take advantage of America’s nationwide diet-fatigue following a month of calorie counting and gym-going, Hostess has recently collaborated with Post to release a dynamic duo of breakfast cereals drawing inspiration from two of their most iconic treats!

Advertising miniature donut-shaped pieces coated in a dusting of superfine powdered sugar, it’s easy to see why Hostess’s Donettes cereal would lure weary resolutioners away from Post’s more “healthful” (i.e. boring) offerings. After all, why settle for Shredded Wheat when you can chow down on a bowl of Donettes for breakfast?

Tempting premise aside, my less than awesome experience with Kellogg’s recent Pop-Tarts cereals caused me to be a just a bit skeptical towards how accurately Post would be able to portray the nostalgic fried delights in spoonable form.

Post Hostess Donettes Cereal w Cheerios

My trepidation turned out to be unjustified, though, because Post actually did a really good job with these. Each piece truly resembled the famous mass-produced dough rings, and dwarfed Cheerios by size alone. The sugary outer dust of each miniature donut directed the cereal’s flavor profile, much like with actual Donettes. I think the ultrafine sugar arguably worked even better in this instance, since it wasn’t thick enough to require you to have a glass of water on hand to help you get them down.

Post Hostess Donettes Cereal Bowl

It holds up surprisingly well in milk, too, especially since it’s just shy of 50% sugar by weight. This isn’t Captain Crunch or anything, but I was able to finish my bowl before it got soggy. Better yet, the sweet dust surrounding each morsel was similarly robust, and I was able to detect its presence even on my final few bites.

Post Hostess Donettes Cereal Closeup

At the end of the day, is this the most unique breakfast item out there? Probably not. That dubious honor undoubtadly belongs to Jimmy Dean’s Blueberry Pancakes & Sausage On-A-Stick. Even so, Donettes Cereal is still tasty in its own right, and it’s the marketing that really allows eating this to be an experience of its own. If nothing else, I would tell people to give this a shot just so they could experience the simple joy of shoving donuts into their mouth by the spoonful.

Now, please excuse me while I pour myself another bowl of Donettes.

Purchased Price: $3.98
Size: 18 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 150 calories, 50 calories from fat, 6 grams of total fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 25 milligrams of potassium, 24 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 13 grams of total sugars, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Post Hostess Honey Bun Cereal

Post Hostess Honey Bun Cereal

We seem to be in the midst of a cerealssance.

Not only are the permanent fixtures beefing up their flavor varieties, but brands not usually known for cereal keep sneaking their way into the aisle. Hell, at this rate of expansion, they may LITERALLY beef up the aisle with a McDonald’s hamburger flavored cereal soon.

You cringe, but you’d probably be morbidly curious enough to try a box. Don’t lie.

Anyway, the point is, new cereals be droppin’.

After its recent venture into the frozen section, Hostess has partnered with Post to transform two of its most iconic snack cakes into a different form of breakfast treat – Powdered Donettes and Honey Bun Cereal.

In an effort to stick to my “chill on the sweets” New Year’s resolution, I decided only to buy the flavor I’d prefer in snack cake form – Honey Bun.

Right from the jump, a pleasant and familiar scent hit me that I didn’t necessarily associate with Honey Buns, despite really trying. I did however immediately think of ripping the seal off a carton of fresh vanilla icing, so I wasn’t too disappointed.

Post Hostess Honey Bun Cereal Holes

The cereal pieces have an interesting shape completely authentic to the look of Honey Buns, except they’re holier. I’m not just referring to the holes, I also mean “holier” in the religious sense, because HOLY CRAP, this cereal is good!

I imagine some people might say it tastes a bit like sugar cookies, but I’m gonna throw a flavor combination at you because it’s all I could think about while eating these – General Mills Oh’s meets Waffle Crisp. (French Toast Crunch also works.)

Post Hostess Honey Bun Cereal in a Bowl

Oh’s are one of my favorite cereals of all time, but I always kinda hated the rough texture. Waffle Crisp was a cereal that laid dormant in my memory until now, because a nostalgia flavor wave, or “flave™” if you will, hit me as soon as I ate a spoonful of Honey Bun cereal. While there isn’t maple, something about the level of sweetness and the texture instantly brought Waffle Crisp right back into my brain.

Post Hostess Honey Bun Cereal Close Up in Milk

The odd shape of this cereal lends itself to an excellent textural experience. They aren’t teeth-shatteringly crispy while dry, but also don’t sog into mush as they settle in the milk.

Now with all this said, I do still think the flavor is true to the iced goodness of Honey Bun snack cakes, which just makes it all the better.

In case you are wondering, the cereal leaves behind a “Honey Nut Cheerio-esque” milk, which is a perfect capper to the experience.

In the end, Honey Bun cereal might be a little too sweet, but that’s me nitpicking and trying to find a negative.

I wasn’t excited about the prospect of a powdered donut cereal, but you better believe I’ll be snatching Donettes up soon. I cannot wait until every last Hostess snack cake becomes a cereal. At this point, that seems inevitable. Don’t miss out on these.

Purchased Price: $3.69
Size: 11.5 oz. box
Purchased at: ShopRite
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3/4 cup) 110 calories, 2 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 24 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Sour Patch Kids Cereal

Sour Patch Kids Cereal

I’m calling it now.

2019 is The Year of the Cereal!

But not just any cereal, the crazy mashup or off the wall flavors that will hopefully debut to push aside the bajillionth Oreo flavor. We are off to a good start with one of the wackiest debuts in a while. Who knew the candy you sometimes get at the movie theater and when you do you end up eating very slowly so as not to get a mouth ulcer (true story!) would be the way to start your day off right?

As I break open the bag of Sour Patch Kids Cereal, I get a whiff of fruitiness very similar to the other many fruity breakfast cereals – Fruity Pebbles, Trix, Froot Loops, etc. However, there is that tinge of sour that’s always present in sour candy. They do smell like Sour Patch Kids. I can feel my lips puckering already!

Sour Patch Kids Cereal 2

There are five colors (blue, green, orange, yellow, and red) that appear subdued a bit as the pieces all have a whitish powdery coating. The shape is close enough to the candy that it works although they are smaller and skinnier and the tops of their heads sometimes skew more towards pointy than rounded. Here’s what they look like in a friendlier breakfast type of way – the kids of Count Chocula while they are still sleeping.

Sour Patch Kids Cereal 3

I take a heaping handful and chomp down on the colorful corpses. The sour comes in strong right out of the gate but fades quickly as it seems to be powder based and certainly not as strong as the large granules on the real thing. Post nailed the intensity as it is just right. Any more would have been pretty off-putting, and any less would have made the whole concept pointless.

However, after it wears off, these devolve to (Insert here any generic fruity cereal). In a gummy shell, these taste like slightly sour fruit loops. As with Froot Loops, the colors all taste the same as each one is a fruity mix of flavors.

Sour Patch Kids Cereal 4

I inhaled a good number of handfuls of these before having the kids take a trip to the milky swimming pool. I wasn’t really shocked to find out that the milk washes away nearly all of the sour powder. With the coating gone, the sweetness of the pieces gets heightened. What did shock me was that the dairy at the end had no sourness whatsoever. It was like a magic trick. Sourness? Poof! Gone with a spoonful of milk. They did stay crunchy, though.

Sour Patch Kids slogan is “Sour. Sweet. Gone.” For this cereal, it should be “Slightly sour. A little too sweet. Kinda feel nauseous now.” This isn’t going to become a staple in your pantry anytime soon, but it sure is a fun novelty that I hope opens the door to more.

Long live The Year of the Cereal!

Purchased Price: $3.89
Size: 10 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 140 calories, 3 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Post Peanut Butter & Cocoa Pebbles Cereal

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal

Conclusion: Post’s Peanut Butter & Cocoa Pebbles could be your new favorite cereal. In law school, I was taught a way of legal writing that begins with the conclusion, follows with supporting evidence, and then restates the conclusion.

There’s my conclusion. Now, here’s my supporting evidence…

Over the past few months, I transitioned to a vegan diet for various reasons. Many assume that a vegan diet is a “healthy” one, but those of us who enjoy junk food know there’s a lot of food that people think is “healthy,” but isn’t.

Potato chips, hard candy, popsicles, soda, beer…often, these are vegan. One of my thrills of eating junk food, however, is finding that stereotypical “junk food” that is closer to “healthy” than many of its so-called “healthy” competitors. Turns out Post’s Peanut Butter & Cocoa Pebbles is a boxful of vegan joy and it’s actually not too bad for you either. Vegans don’t have to be stuck with granola unless they want to be.

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal 2

Right out of the box, the Pebbles smelled like cocoa butter with a hint of nuts, not clearly peanuts, but nutty. I snacked on a handful while I waited for my unsweetened almond milk to soak into the pebbles. In their dry state, they are crispy and taste like what I imagine a freeze-dried Reese’s Cup Rice Krispie treat would taste like. After waiting about 30 seconds, I dug in.

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal 3

Each spoonful was a delight. The peanut butter and cocoa flavors were balanced, but notable, in each bite. The peanut butter flavor was authentic, not artificial tasting. The cocoa flavor was light and reminiscent of chocolate milk. I poured myself another bowl. Bowl 2 was equally as satisfying as Bowl 1. Rinse and repeat.

The next morning, I tried the cereal with unsweetened oat milk to test whether the nuttiness of the almond milk made a difference in the overall flavor. There was little difference between the cereal with the almond milk and the cereal with the oat milk. The cereal held up well in both and I suspect it would do equally well in any milk. It also held up well after three minutes of unintentional soak time, only slightly less crispy, but definitely not soggy.

Post Peanut Butter  Cocoa Pebbles Cereal 4

I’m not a fan of drinking milk, so I rarely drink the leftover milk from cereal. With this cereal, I just kept adding more cereal to my milk until there was no more milk left. However, the last sip of milk remaining was slurp-worthy, not too sweet, nor with too much disintegrated cereal debris.

Conclusion: Go ahead, eat five bowlsful while watching cartoons on Netflix (Inspector Gadget, anyone?) Or, try topping your (vegan) yogurt or ice cream with the leftover cereal that always manages to end up at the bottom of the box. Any way you eat this, I’m sure you will enjoy it.

(Editor’s Note: A Post Cereals representative tells me that this currently is not gluten-free.)

(Nutrition Facts – 3/4 cup serving – 120 calories, 2.5 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 24 grams of carbohydrates, 9 grams of sugars, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $3.48
Size: 20 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 10 out of 10
Pros: Vegan. Low sugar for a “sugary” cereal. Versatile snack. Real peanut butter and cocoa ingredients.
Cons: Cartoons aren’t the same as they used to be.

REVIEW: Post Golden Oreo O’s Cereal

Post Golden Oreo O s Cereal

I’ve got to be honest, if/when Post’s Golden Oreo O’s Cereal gets discontinued, I don’t think there will the same upswell of support to bring it back like there was with the original Oreo O’s Cereal after it disappeared from shelves.

Because Oreo > Golden Oreo.

So no Bring Back Golden Oreo O’s Cereal Facebook pages to like that’ll cause your Facebook timeline to suddenly have more junk food and weight loss ads. And there won’t be folks who will buy boxes on eBay from sellers in South Korea.

But, even though I feel that way, it’s a decent breakfast cereal.

Post Golden Oreo O s Cereal 2

The round corn pieces with white sprinkles look like the bleached version of Oreo O’s Cereal. Taking a whiff of the cereal in the bag, it does remind me of the cookies, but its flavor makes me think of another cereal. I can’t put my tongue on what it is, but there’s a part of me that wants to believe it’s C-3PO’s Cereal. That’s probably not the case, and I’m sorry to anyone whose hopes I got up with the previous sentence.

Although I can’t figure out which cereal it’s similar to, its flavor is what I imagine the textbook taste definition of sweet corn-based breakfast cereal would be. It’s a combination of artificial vanilla, sugar, and the sweetness of corn.

Post’s Golden Oreo O’s tastes as much like Nabisco’s Golden Oreo as Post’s Oreo O’s tastes like Nabisco’s Oreo, which means not a whole lot. But I’m fine with that because I’ve been happily filling my bowl with it over the past few days, mindlessly munching on it as I try to figure out what frickin’ cereal it’s like. Some of the sweetness does wash off into the milk, so expect a treat when you slurp it up.

To be honest, much like my position with the cookies, Oreo O’s Cereal > Golden Oreo O’s Cereal. I’m not saying this belongs on a lower tier by any means, but I prefer the chocolate version. It comes in a family-sized box from Walmart, so if you hate it, although I imagine you won’t, it’ll last you for a while.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free sample of the product. Doing so did not influence my review in any way.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 cup – 120 calories, 15 calories from fat, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 25 milligrams of potassium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 19 oz. box
Purchased at: Received from PR people
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: The textbook taste definition of sweet corn-based breakfast cereal. Smells like Golden Oreo Cookies in the bag. Sweetness washes off into milk.
Cons: Doesn’t taste Golden Oreo Cookies. Kind of generic cereal flavor. Probably not C-3P0’s Cereal. Can’t figure out what cereal it tastes like.