{"id":17029,"date":"2014-06-12T07:00:00","date_gmt":"2014-06-12T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/?p=17029"},"modified":"2023-08-30T15:34:27","modified_gmt":"2023-08-31T01:34:27","slug":"review-taco-bell-quesarito","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2014\/06\/12\/review-taco-bell-quesarito\/","title":{"rendered":"REVIEW: Taco Bell Quesarito"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Taco<\/a><\/p>\n

Taco Bell has a new item, and instead of rearranging the same ol\u2019 ingredients in a new format like they usually do, they\u2019ve taken to rearranging names of existing foods. The Quesarito is a portmanteau of \u201cquesadilla\u201d and \u201cburrito,\u201d and features meat, sauce and rice wrapped in a tortilla with a layer of cheese around the inner core. <\/p>\n

Hmmm, I guess they are just using the same ol\u2019 ingredients too. Like a boring mad scientist. Like if Dr. Moreau kept promising a herd of hybrid leopard-men but just kept putting the legs of rats on legless rat bodies. You know what, though? That\u2019s still pretty impressive. And you know what else? The Quesarito is also pretty impressive.<\/p>\n

Maybe the greatest thing about the Quesarito is that it doesn\u2019t really taste like it comes from Taco Bell. It has Taco Bell elements, sure: a disregard for fresh vegetables, a runny sauce that coats all the ingredients, it emanates nuclear fast food warmth. <\/p>\n

But the Quesarito has heft. It has substance. Other Taco Bell items often feel chintzy, like they are designed to run through our bodies as fast as possible. Tasty, edible garbage. The Quesarito feels like food. I feel comfortable even calling it a \u201cgut bomb.\u201d And from my experience, the Quesarito comes with a free sizeable nap. <\/p>\n

This is thanks to a couple things. It\u2019s a burrito wrapped in a quesadilla, so the tortilla is actually doubled up, which makes it chewier. The rice is also new. It\u2019s \u201cLatin rice,\u201d which I guess means it was a loser studying a dead language in high school. But you can pick out individual grains and it\u2019s cooked more al dente than the rice in other sister items. Biting into a Quesarito, you can sense full, sturdy ingredients. Seems like maybe they took a look at the modus operandi<\/i> of one Chipotle restaurant and decided to go sic semper tyrannis<\/i> on \u2018em. Side note: anyone have a time machine and know how to say \u201cPlease go to prom with me\u201d in Latin? Asking for an amicus<\/i>.<\/p>\n

\"Taco<\/a><\/p>\n

The decent base of tortilla and rice gives the cheese and protein a solid springboard to showcase their flavors, and for the most part, they do a good job. The cheese in the quesadilla forms a golden ring around the bisected burrito, and every bite is equally blessed by the melty smoothness. <\/p>\n

\"Taco<\/a><\/p>\n

Of the three meat options, the relatively muted shredded chicken fares the best, playing along with the rest of the Quesarito to let every ingredient shine in a concert of flavor and texture. The steak is fine too, but every bite was filled with sinew and makes the burrito feel stringy. The beef is the ground beef from all the other Taco Bell stuff, and as such it lacks subtlety. It\u2019s salty like a salt lick, to the point where it almost burns, and definitely overpowers the quieter elements in the Quesarito. <\/p>\n

It\u2019s also ground to the point of almost being a meat puree, and seems out of place in this new, gentler Taco Bell item. It\u2019s time to leave your hometown, Ground Beef. See the world, get some new perspective. Yeah, Ground Beef, we\u2019ll leave tomorrow. Let\u2019s go out back for now, look at the rabbits. That\u2019s it, pet the rabbits. Oops, I shot Ground Beef in the back of the head. I\u2019m sorry, Ground Beef. You\u2019ll never over-salt anyone\u2019s tongue again, Ground Beef. You are reunited in heaven with the Blackjack Taco and the Volcano Menu.<\/p>\n

Now the bad. It\u2019s pretty much just the sour cream. Maybe it actually goes well with the Quesarito, but it\u2019s a problem of construction, not taste. The way the sour cream is dispensed on the tortilla, it\u2019s packed all into one end, like if the Quesarito was an airplane, the sour cream takes up first class. And that\u2019s confusing, because first class is a good thing, but there isn\u2019t anything called \u201clast class.\u201d <\/p>\n

Okay. If the Quesarito was an airplane, the sour cream takes up all of last class. And I\u2019m Godzilla or Optimus Prime or whatever, and I want to eat the plane, and I bite in and I get a giant mouthful of tangy sour cream. That\u2019s insane. Because who put all this sour cream in an airplane? <\/p>\n

But as a human, if I wanted a mouthful of sour cream I\u2019d go to the sour cream store and grab a spoon. Oh wait, that doesn\u2019t exist, because we are civilized people and not creeps and nobody wants mouthfuls of sour cream. And the sour cream pocket is on either end of the Quesarito so it\u2019s like playing Russian roulette with every beginning bite. Mexican-Russian roulette. Sorry. Mexican-Russian-American roulette. We\u2019re a melting pot, folks.<\/p>\n

So Taco Bell smushed two words together and they scored a home-down\/touch-run with the Quesarito. They made the Brangelina of fast food. Oh! Are any of those kids in that family Mexican-Russian? <\/p>\n

The Quesarito is a success, and soon we might be calling Merriam-Webster to add a new word, like all those popular portmanteaus of the past such as bromance, Californication and Fleshlight. Welp, just made myself barf with that string of words. That\u2019s okay, more room for Quesarito.<\/p>\n

(Nutrition Facts – 1 ground beef Quesarito* – 650 calories, 300 calories from fat, 34 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of trans fat, 60 grams of cholesterol, 1450 milligrams of sodium, 65 grams of carbohydrates, 6 grams of fiber, 5 grams of sugar, 22 grams of protein.)<\/small><\/p>\n

*Nutrition facts for chicken and steak versions not available on Taco Bell website.<\/small><\/p>\n

Item:<\/b> Taco Bell Quesarito
\nPurchased Price:<\/b> $1.99 (Ground Beef), $2.79 (Chicken) and $2.99 (Steak)
\nSize:<\/b> N\/A
\nPurchased at:<\/b> Taco Bell
\nRating:<\/b> 6 out of 10 (Ground Beef)
\nRating:<\/b> 9 out of 10 (Chicken)
\nRating:<\/b> 7 out of 10 (Steak)
\nPros:<\/b> Substantial, filling. Tastes like actual food. Cheese in every bite. The rice is great.
\nCons:<\/b> Very salty, particularly the beef. Steak is sinewy. Can be runny. Sour cream is always stuck in one bite.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Taco Bell has a new item, and instead of rearranging the same ol\u2019 ingredients in a new format like they usually do, they\u2019ve taken to rearranging names of existing foods. The Quesarito is a portmanteau of \u201cquesadilla\u201d and \u201cburrito,\u201d and features meat, sauce and rice wrapped in a tortilla with a layer of cheese around […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":27,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1477,1519],"class_list":["post-17029","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-fast-food","tag-taco-bell"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":18144,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2015\/03\/03\/review-taco-bell-sriracha-quesarito\/","url_meta":{"origin":17029,"position":0},"title":"REVIEW: Taco Bell Sriracha Quesarito","author":"Marvo","date":"March 3, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"It's hard to believe Taco Bell decided to get out of their Tex-Mex comfort zone with their new Sriracha Quesarito. But then again, I guess it was inevitable since sriracha continues to be a popular ingredient. It's gotten so trendy that if you went to a grocery store and threw\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Taco Bell Sriracha Quesarito","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm9.staticflickr.com\/8631\/16513414040_389060c512_z.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm9.staticflickr.com\/8631\/16513414040_389060c512_z.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm9.staticflickr.com\/8631\/16513414040_389060c512_z.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":17000,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2014\/06\/09\/fast-food-news-taco-bell-quesarito\/","url_meta":{"origin":17029,"position":1},"title":"FAST FOOD NEWS – Taco Bell Quesarito","author":"Marvo","date":"June 9, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"The Taco Bell Quesarito is a burrito wrapped in a quesadilla, and I really hope Taco Bell's new quesadilla-burrito hybrid is the beginning of many more hybrid products with names that your smartphone wants so badly to autocorrect. According to the L.A. Times, the burrito is available with seasoned beef\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Fast Food News"","block_context":{"text":"Fast Food News","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/fast-food-news\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Taco Bell Quesarito jpg","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/06\/Taco-Bell-Quesarito.jpg-.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":19109,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2015\/09\/24\/fast-food-news-taco-bell-volcano-quesarito-and-starburst-cherry-freeze\/","url_meta":{"origin":17029,"position":2},"title":"FAST FOOD NEWS: Taco Bell Volcano Quesarito and Starburst Cherry Freeze","author":"Marvo","date":"September 24, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Taco Bell's Lava Sauce is back! And it's available with their new Volcano Quesarito. Although, now that it's back, you can probably get it on almost anything your heart desires on Taco Bell's menu. Thanks, customization! If you're not familiar with the Quesarito, it brings together the best of a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Fast Food News"","block_context":{"text":"Fast Food News","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/fast-food-news\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Taco Bell Volcano Quesarito","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/Taco-Bell-Volcano-Quesarito.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/Taco-Bell-Volcano-Quesarito.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/09\/Taco-Bell-Volcano-Quesarito.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":18124,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2015\/02\/26\/fast-food-news-taco-bell-sriracha-quesarito-and-snapple-lemonade-freeze\/","url_meta":{"origin":17029,"position":3},"title":"FAST FOOD NEWS: Taco Bell Sriracha Quesarito and Snapple Lemonade Freeze","author":"Marvo","date":"February 26, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Update: We reviewed it! 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