{"id":18715,"date":"2015-06-30T06:00:00","date_gmt":"2015-06-30T16:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/?p=18715"},"modified":"2023-08-30T15:16:12","modified_gmt":"2023-08-31T01:16:12","slug":"review-nabisco-limited-edition-brownie-chewy-chips-ahoy-cookies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2015\/06\/30\/review-nabisco-limited-edition-brownie-chewy-chips-ahoy-cookies\/","title":{"rendered":"REVIEW: Nabisco Limited Edition Brownie Chewy Chips Ahoy Cookies"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Nabisco<\/a><\/p>\n

Day 1:<\/i> Test Subject CH-19 has reported for experimentation. CH-19 is an ordinary, unassuming Chewy Chips Ahoy! cookie. While being paid for its compliance, our scientists injected CH-19 with the brownie genome. Is this ethical? Perhaps not, but those nefarious Girl Scouts have little girls running around calling themselves \u201cBrownies,\u201d so our study will continue, too.<\/p>\n

Day 20:<\/i> It\u2019s working. CH-19 reported digestive bloating, and our x-rays revealed that a brownie is indeed growing inside of it. Satisfied, our scientists will sell some of the other subjects in this condition and call them <\/a>Brownie Filled Chewy Chips Ahoy! cookies.<\/p>\n

\"Nabisco<\/a><\/p>\n

Day 32:<\/i> We had no idea that the brownie filled cookies were only Phase 2 of a grander biological process. The metamorphosis into full-blown Brownie Chewy Chips Ahoy! cookie is complete. After an incident not unlike a cocoa-covered version of that scene from Aliens<\/i>, the brownie chestburster has entirely taken over CH-19 (Sigourney Weaver wouldn\u2019t answer our phone calls). Its blondie exterior is now the earthy color of fresh soil, and he is emitting a scent similar to your grandma\u2019s kitchen during the county fair bake sale.<\/p>\n

Day 42:<\/i> Dissecting CH-19 for taste testing, the soft, chip-stuffed exterior of the roughly Pog-sized (only real \u201890s cookies remember!<\/i>) treat crumbled easily, revealing its dense, crumb-spewing innards. <\/p>\n

\"Nabisco<\/a><\/p>\n

Its base flavor is remarkably similar to regular Chewy Chips Ahoy! cookies: buttery, moist, and straddling the border of cloyingly sweet with its noticeable brown sugar undertones and added sugariness from the exploding chocolate chip morsels. At first, a blind taste tester might not even be able to discern post-transformation CH-19 from his original state.<\/p>\n

However, further analysis reveals CH-19\u2019s new superpower: the power of the chew<\/i>. By chewing, chewing, and continuing to chew until your jawbones experience karoshi<\/i> (word of the day, kids!), new depths of flavor are unearthed. First comes a dull cocoa, which quickly becomes a doughy richness that has some genuine fudge notes. This comparatively subdued cocoa taste pairs well with the chocolate chips\u2019 blasts of straight sugar.<\/p>\n

But despite the complexities lurking deep within CH-19\u2019s soul, the jaw exhaustion (ex-jaw-stion?) necessary to bring them out isn\u2019t worth the end result. Without the vanilla undertones or oily base (their uncomfortable sticky gloss doesn\u2019t count) of a genuine brownie, these cookies can\u2019t be considered a reasonable replacement for the actual thing. CH-19 and his fellow subjects fall more into the category of \u201cobviously artificial cookies that taste just real enough for Mom to pass them off as homemade so she can have a gosh darn night to herself for once.\u201d<\/p>\n

All in all, the cookies are like when the director rereleases your favorite movie with 7 seconds of deleted footage: the added cocoa-brownie taste is, well, tasty, but it’s so barely noticeable that only the delicate palates of seasoned Ahoy!coholics will be driven to hunt these down.<\/p>\n

\"Nabisco<\/a><\/p>\n

Day 44:<\/i> Uh oh. CH-19 is not happy. It has transcended its brownie form and evolved into a higher being. CH-19 has entered Phase 4. The self-titled and grammatically questionable \u201cAhoy!wich\u201d makes for a delightfully potent and extra chocolaty version of a Chipwich\u2014albeit a disappointingly bite-sized one. The flavor of CH-19\u2019s new vanilla ice cream abdomen ups his \u201cbrownie credibility\u201d another notch. He\u2019s too powerful now.<\/p>\n

The Ahoy!calypse is upon us.<\/p>\n

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies \u2013 140 calories, 50 calories from fat, 6 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 95 milligrams of sodium, 60 milligrams of potassium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.)<\/small><\/p>\n

Item:<\/b> Nabisco Limited Edition Brownie Chewy Chips Ahoy Cookies
\nPurchased Price:<\/b> $2.50
\nSize:<\/b> 9.5 oz.
\nPurchased at:<\/b> Spartan Store
\nRating:<\/b> 7 out of 10
\nPros:<\/b> Chewy goodness. The ol\u2019 one-two cocoa-chocolate punch. Learning new words. Hey look, Mom made cookies!
\nCons:<\/b> Not brownie-y enough. Not much difference from \u201cblondie\u201d chewy Chips Ahoy! Ex-jaw-stion. Randomly placed exclamation! points. Our new Ahoy!wich overlords.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Day 1: Test Subject CH-19 has reported for experimentation. CH-19 is an ordinary, unassuming Chewy Chips Ahoy! cookie. While being paid for its compliance, our scientists injected CH-19 with the brownie genome. Is this ethical? Perhaps not, but those nefarious Girl Scouts have little girls running around calling themselves \u201cBrownies,\u201d so our study will continue, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1654,1501,1796],"class_list":["post-18715","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-chips-ahoy","tag-cookies","tag-nabisco"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":18681,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2015\/06\/22\/spotted-on-shelves-nabisco-limited-edition-brownie-chewy-chips-ahoy-cookies\/","url_meta":{"origin":18715,"position":0},"title":"SPOTTED ON SHELVES: Nabisco Limited Edition Brownie Chewy Chips Ahoy Cookies","author":"Marvo","date":"June 22, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"You might be wondering, \"Hey! Didn't Chips Ahoy do this already?\" Your junk food mind palace is probably thinking of this. (Spotted by Robbie at Walmart.) 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