{"id":20005,"date":"2016-05-02T02:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-05-02T12:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/?p=20005"},"modified":"2021-01-05T21:14:31","modified_gmt":"2021-01-06T07:14:31","slug":"review-hostess-brownies-made-with-milk-chocolate-mms","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2016\/05\/02\/review-hostess-brownies-made-with-milk-chocolate-mms\/","title":{"rendered":"REVIEW: Hostess Brownies made with Milk Chocolate M&M’s"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Hostess<\/a><\/p>\n

Dear Hostess,<\/p>\n

Let me start by saying that I\u2019ve always been loyal. <\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been eating your cakes since I first misinterpreted the song\u2019s lyrics as \u201cTwinkie Twinkie Little Star.\u201d When a friend bet me $2 that I couldn\u2019t eat an entire Ho Ho in one bite, you better believe I sucked it down like a cr\u00e8me-stuffed Kobayashi. Your treats even helped me escape grade school shame, as I bragged to my friends how I had a girlfriend named Suzy Q.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou wouldn\u2019t know her. She goes to another school!\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

That\u2019s why I\u2019m sorry. I\u2019m sorry that even after I resisted the smutty Nutty Bars and curvaceous Swiss Rolls of Little Debbie, that foul temptress broke my willpower with her decadent Cosmic Brownies. <\/p>\n

I\u2019m a sucker for sticky, artificial brownies, and your discontinued Brownie Bites left a hole in my life that only Debbie\u2019s fudgy bricks could fill.<\/p>\n

But it\u2019s okay, because now you have these new brownies made with M&M\u2019s. I understand there\u2019s a new man in your life, but I\u2019m going to prove that I can treat you better than that wisecracking red M&M ever could. I\u2019m gonna eat this entire box of brownies, just like the good old days when we\u2019d munch through pouches of Mini Muffins without a care or \u201csuggested serving size\u201d in the world.<\/p>\n

\"Hostess<\/a><\/p>\n

Your candy-studded brownies are shorter, but girthier than the connected LEGO bricks of Cosmic Brownies. This is good: I like a minimalistic gal. And upon first bite, I immediately remembered why I love you, Hostess.<\/p>\n

All the grandmas of the world can heave a collective sigh of relief, because these are no replacement for homemade brownies\u2014there\u2019s no eggy denseness, dark cocoa complexity, or touch of vanilla. But what there is<\/i> is fudge, and lots of it: way more than in any Cosmic Brownie.<\/p>\n

Between the frosting and the hyper-crumbly base, your brownies have enough rich fudge flavor to make Fudgy the Whale fudge his pants. It\u2019s super sweet, but also pleasantly buttery. You always did know how to butter me up, Hostess.<\/p>\n

Your M&M\u2019s brownies beat Debbie\u2019s in texture, too. While hers may have a compelling chewiness, yours are more satisfyingly soft and spongy. Combined with the smooth frosting, the whole brownie feels and tastes like a cream-less Oreo Cakester with Hostess Cupcake icing.<\/p>\n

And since I\u2019d give up my right arm, my right to bear arms, and my beloved childhood Teddy Bear to bring Oreo Cakesters back from the snack graveyard, this comparison is a high compliment. <\/p>\n

\"Hostess<\/a><\/p>\n

Oh, and the M&M\u2019s? They\u2019re way better than any lame Cosmic Chips, because they\u2019re M&M\u2019s Minis. With a fun, crackling texture contrast and a superior shell-to-chocolate ratio that would make a normal M&M consider liposuction, the Minis provide bombshell bursts of milky sweetness in an otherwise fudge-dominated world. <\/p>\n

There aren\u2019t many M&M\u2019s on top, but there are more buried down in your brownies\u2019 deepest recesses. It\u2019s like the old phrase says: \u201cyou can\u2019t judge a book by its miniaturized milk chocolate morsel bedazzled cover.\u201d <\/p>\n

Sure, your brownies aren\u2019t perfect: they\u2019re too small for a satisfying snack, they make a hell of a crumb-spewing mess, and they have an uncomfortable oily aftertaste. But I\u2019m willing to look past that if you can forgive my infidelity. I promise, my sordid affair with Deborah is over, and you and I still have many happy fudgy days ahead. <\/p>\n

I don\u2019t need Cosmic Brownies to have out of this world taste, Hostess. Because when it comes to highly processed snack cakes, you are my universe.<\/p>\n

(Nutrition Facts – 1 brownie \u2013 170 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 80 milligrams of sodium, 64 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 19 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein..)<\/small><\/p>\n

Purchased Price:<\/b> $3.99
\nSize:<\/b> 9.1. oz box\/6 brownies
\nPurchased at:<\/b> Meijer
\nRating:<\/b> 9 out of 10
\nPros:<\/b> A fudgy m\u00e9nage \u00e0 trois<\/i> between candy, Cupcake, and Cakester. Deeply buried Mini M&M’s landmines. Squares so spongy that Nickelodeon might sue. Building my inevitable tomb out of fudgy bricks.
\nCons:<\/b> Kicking up brownie crumb dust clouds. Won\u2019t out-Grandma your Grandma. Snack cake infidelity. Crying over old Polaroids of Oreo Cakesters.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Hostess, Let me start by saying that I\u2019ve always been loyal. I\u2019ve been eating your cakes since I first misinterpreted the song\u2019s lyrics as \u201cTwinkie Twinkie Little Star.\u201d When a friend bet me $2 that I couldn\u2019t eat an entire Ho Ho in one bite, you better believe I sucked it down like a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1504],"class_list":["post-20005","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-hostess"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":21772,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2017\/04\/06\/review-hostess-chocodile-fudge-covered-twinkies-2017\/","url_meta":{"origin":20005,"position":0},"title":"REVIEW: Hostess Chocodile Fudge Covered Twinkies (2017)","author":"Adam","date":"April 6, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"The following conversations were taped on a recorded line, for quality assurance purposes. 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