{"id":203,"date":"2005-05-03T00:00:04","date_gmt":"2005-05-03T10:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/?p=203"},"modified":"2023-08-12T20:39:08","modified_gmt":"2023-08-13T06:39:08","slug":"clorox-toilet-wand","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/05\/03\/clorox-toilet-wand\/","title":{"rendered":"Clorox Toilet Wand"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Clorox<\/p>\n

If there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s one thing that makes me attractive to the ladies, it would be the fact that I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m domesticated. I do every chore around the house, like wash dishes, vacuum, take out the trash, mop floors, recycle plastics and glass, wash clothes, iron clothes, dust, clean bathrooms, and polish the stripper pole.<\/p>\n

Sexy, right ladies? Sure I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have looks, but I know you like the way my dishpan hands feel. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have emotions, but my Pine-Sol and Pledge scent makes me irresistible. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have class, but I know you like how gentle I am hand-washing delicate clothing.<\/p>\n

Trying to be sexy by doing chores is hard work and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m all for ways to make it easier, so a few weeks ago I picked up a Clorox Toilet Wand. I also decided to pick it up because I REALLY needed to replace my five-year old toilet brush.<\/p>\n

I could show you what my old toilet brush looked like, but much like people who have had too many botox injections, a picture of it would make you sick. Let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just say that the brush was originally the color blue and now it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s bluish-gray with black spots.<\/p>\n

What attracted me to the Clorox Toilet Wand was the detachable disposable Clorox-soaked brush heads, which allowed me to clean the toilet and then throw away the brush head, before it turned gray or any other color.<\/p>\n

To test the Clorox Toilet Wand, I needed to get my toilet dirty. Fortunately, that only takes about three weeks. As you can see on the left side on the picture below, it gets pretty disgusting. (Click pic to get a larger image.) Also, if you look real closely, I think you can see an image of the Virgin Mary.<\/p>\n

Because each brush head is soaked in Clorox, no other cleaning products are needed. However, I found that each brush head has enough Clorox for only one cleaning.<\/p>\n

As you can see on the right side of the picture below, the Clorox Toilet Wand did a pretty good job of making my toilet clean enough for dogs to drink out of, even under the rim. It didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get rid of the hard stains, but a little work with a scouring stick and my not-so-muscular arms will get those out.<\/p>\n

\"Clorox<\/a><\/p>\n

After I was done cleaning, I just squeezed the water out of the brush head on the side of the bowl, held the Toilet Wand over the trash can, and slid the blue button to release the brush head into the trash.<\/p>\n

This process sort of reminded me of my days in middle school bathrooms with a couple of bullies…BUT I DON\u00e2\u20ac\u2122T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT! I GOT MY REVENGE!<\/p>\n

I was impressed with the Clorox Toilet Wand, it magically cleaned my toilet. <\/p>\n

While looking at my reflection in the toilet\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s water and saying my new daily affirmation, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I am a man, not a boy,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I began wondering what else the Clorox Toilet Wand could magically do.<\/p>\n

Being the poor bastard that I am, I decided to see if I could have money magically appear. However, at first I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know how to go about doing this. Should I use the Harry Potter technique or the Mickey Mouse Fantasia technique? I eventually decided that I would use Harry Potter technique and began thinking of spells.<\/p>\n

I thought about it for a bit, then waved the Clorox Toilet Wand in the air, and recited a spell to have money magically appear, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oprahus Bankaccountus!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

Nothing happened.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hiltona Inheritanso!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

Crap, nothing.<\/p>\n

Then I thought about trying a different spell and decided to see if the Clorox Toilet Wand could get a not-so-attractive, slightly overweight guy really beautiful women.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Keithas Richardis!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

Nada.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Ronus Jeremiaus!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

No dice.<\/p>\n

Damn.<\/p>\n

Well I guess I should be happy that cleaning my toilet is now easier and less gross with the Clorox Toilet Wand. Too bad it can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t make polishing the stripper pole any easier, because that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s one daunting task.<\/p>\n

\n

Item:<\/b> Clorox Toilet Wand
\nPurchase Price:<\/b> $9.99 (on sale)(Toilet Wand + 6 brush heads)
\nRating:<\/b> 4 out of 5
\nPros:<\/b> Detachable disposable Clorox-soaked brush head. Easier to clean under the rim. I am a sexy cleaning machine.
\nCons:<\/b> Brush heads have enough Clorox for only one use. Replacement brush heads are pricey. Doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get rid of hard stains. No magical powers.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s one thing that makes me attractive to the ladies, it would be the fact that I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m domesticated. I do every chore around the house, like wash dishes, vacuum, take out the trash, mop floors, recycle plastics and glass, wash clothes, iron clothes, dust, clean bathrooms, and polish the stripper pole. Sexy, right ladies? […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1753],"class_list":["post-203","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-misc"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":141,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/02\/09\/itunes-gift-card\/","url_meta":{"origin":203,"position":0},"title":"iTunes Gift Card","author":"Marvo","date":"February 9, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Damn you, VH1\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s I Love the 80s and I Love the 90s for sticking in my head those songs that I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d like to forget. 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