{"id":20540,"date":"2016-09-01T02:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-09-01T12:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/?p=20540"},"modified":"2023-08-30T15:12:17","modified_gmt":"2023-08-31T01:12:17","slug":"review-limited-edition-cinnamon-donut-chewy-chips-ahoy-cookies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2016\/09\/01\/review-limited-edition-cinnamon-donut-chewy-chips-ahoy-cookies\/","title":{"rendered":"REVIEW: Limited Edition Cinnamon Donut Chewy Chips Ahoy Cookies"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Limited<\/a><\/p>\n

The judge pounds his gavel: \u201cI hereby call this court to order. Today we\u2019ll handle the case of Dan vs. Nabisco<\/i>. The prosecutor may present his case.\u201d<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve decided to represent myself. No lawyer would understand: \u201cYour honor, I\u2019m suing Nabisco\u2019s new Chewy Cinnamon Donut Chips Ahoy! cookies for their misleading packaging design.\u201d<\/p>\n

The judge looks at me, as I rustle through my bag and spew crumbs onto the courtroom floor: \u201cIf you\u2019re suing them, why are you still eating the accused cookies?\u201d<\/p>\n

I roar to life, passionately spraying another projectile sandstorm of sugary cinnamon crumbs across the room: \u201cBecause I expected so much more!<\/p>\n

\u201cLadies, gentlemen, and anthropomorphized snack food mascots of the court, I love these Cinnamon Donut Chips Ahoy! cookies. In fact, I love them so much that they\u2019re probably the best limited edition cookies I\u2019ve tasted in years. But it\u2019s the ones we love the most that end up hurting us.<\/p>\n

\u201cI present Exhibit A: a package of these backstabbing cookies. Aside from the massive cinnamon donut on the front — which doesn\u2019t actually appear inside — the primary offenders here are the \u2018Limited Edition\u2019 leaves. You see, my mind has been conditioned by Mrs. Buttersworth to equate orange and yellow leaves with maple syrup flavoring.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo imagine my shock and disgust when these Cinnamon Donut cookies contained no maple flavoring whatsoever. All they had was a whole lot of deliciously doughy, buttery, and bakery-fresh donut flavor!<\/p>\n

\"Limited<\/a><\/p>\n

\u201cBut the lies don\u2019t stop there. These disks roped me in with an authentically decadent cider mill aroma, but they don\u2019t even look like real cider donuts! Where are the buxom, golden fried curves? Where\u2019s the coyly puckered hole in the middle?<\/p>\n

\u201cThey\u2019re both gone and replaced by a granular, hyper-chewy texture that melts in my mouth like half-baked pastry dough. And don\u2019t get me wrong, your honor, these cookies taste like cider donut dough, too. The buttered and browned base is both sugary and eggy, with sweet bursts of cake flour.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut the apple and cinnamon donut-flavored chips suckered me in for the long con, trying to distract me from Nabisco\u2019s shamelessly maple-free fraud. See, these creamy chips are like coagulated cones of cream cheese glaze. They explode with flavor like a Cinnabon center stuffed with applesauce!<\/p>\n

\u201cTheir inconsistency betrays them, though. These cookie con men will sometimes lose their subtle apple taste, and sometimes they\u2019ll taste like waxy, floral ‘Fall Harvest’ scented candles from Bath & Body Works. Heck, a couple times I even swore they tasted like pumpkin cheesecake.<\/p>\n

\"Limited<\/a><\/p>\n

\u201cSo yes, your honor, Cinnamon Donut Chips Ahoy! are great limited edition snack cookies. They have all the goodness of raw sugar cookie dough without the salmonella, and all the goodness of a cider mill without the handsy haunted house workers. <\/p>\n

\u201cHowever, it\u2019s tough to justify buying them over real apple cider donuts, unless you\u2019re a maple-loving masochist or the type of person who can\u2019t finish a dozen donuts without them going stale. Because at the end of the day, these Cinnamon Donut Chips Ahoy! aren\u2019t donuts. They\u2019re merely cookies wearing donut Halloween costumes.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd that, your honor, is both their gift and their true crime.\u201d<\/p>\n

The judge, clearly affected by my plight, wipes away a single tear: \u201cI declare Cinnamon Donut Chips Ahoy! cookies guilty, for covering up their felony of syrup deception behind a thick alibi of deliciousness. How would the defendant like to see them executed?\u201d<\/p>\n

I pull out my thermos and pour a hot cup of coffee. I\u2019ve already known the answer to that question for days.<\/p>\n

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies \u2013 130 calories, 50 calories from fat, 5 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 15 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein..)<\/small><\/p>\n

Purchased Price:<\/b> $2.49
\nSize:<\/b> 9.5 oz package
\nPurchased at:<\/b> Meijer
\nRating:<\/b> 8 out of 10
\nPros:<\/b> Authentic cinnamon donut pantomime. An edible trip to the cider mill in late summer. The first ever complimentary use of the word \u201ccoagulated.\u201d Coming soon from The Impulsive Buy: 12 Angry Kool-Aid Men!<\/i>
\nCons:<\/b> Not maple-flavored. Playing for second place against real donuts.. Unexpected Yankee Candle flavor outbursts. Sobbing and bobbing for more apple flavor. A criminal lack of corrugated, scrunched-up donut holes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The judge pounds his gavel: \u201cI hereby call this court to order. Today we\u2019ll handle the case of Dan vs. Nabisco. The prosecutor may present his case.\u201d I\u2019ve decided to represent myself. No lawyer would understand: \u201cYour honor, I\u2019m suing Nabisco\u2019s new Chewy Cinnamon Donut Chips Ahoy! cookies for their misleading packaging design.\u201d The judge […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1654,1501,1796],"class_list":["post-20540","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-chips-ahoy","tag-cookies","tag-nabisco"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":20520,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2016\/08\/26\/spotted-on-shelves-limited-edition-cinnamon-donut-chewy-chips-ahoy-cookies\/","url_meta":{"origin":20540,"position":0},"title":"SPOTTED ON SHELVES: Limited Edition Cinnamon Donut Chewy Chips Ahoy Cookies","author":"Marvo","date":"August 26, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"This has me craving a glazed donut Chips Ahoy cookie or a glazed donut Oreo cookie. Making it happen, Nabisco! (Spotted by Brent E at Giant Eagle Market District.) 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Chewy Gooey Cookies (Chocofudge and Megafudge)","author":"Marvo","date":"May 23, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Chips Ahoy cookies are like the human drug testing subjects of the cookie world because Nabisco will stick anything into them to see if it works. Reese's Peanut Butter Cups...yup. Heath Candy Bar pieces...yup. Candy coated chocolate pieces...yup. Oatmeal...yup. Patriotism...yup. This time around they're putting fudge into the center of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Chocofudge","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm4.static.flickr.com\/3504\/5738148689_5f984db3da.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":54163,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2022\/12\/12\/coming-soon-chips-ahoy-chewy-confetti-cake-flavored-cookies\/","url_meta":{"origin":20540,"position":5},"title":"COMING SOON: Chips Ahoy! Chewy Confetti Cake Flavored Cookies","author":"Marvo","date":"December 12, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Happy 60th Birthday, Chips Ahoy!! Well, actually its birthday is in 2023, so my birthday wishes are a little early since we're still in 2022 as I type this. To celebrate Chips Ahoy's 60 years, Nabisco will be rolling out Chewy Chips Ahoy! 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