{"id":230,"date":"2005-06-15T00:00:23","date_gmt":"2005-06-15T10:00:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/?p=230"},"modified":"2023-08-14T17:11:54","modified_gmt":"2023-08-15T03:11:54","slug":"rip-it-energy-fuel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/06\/15\/rip-it-energy-fuel\/","title":{"rendered":"Rip It Energy Fuel"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Rip<\/p>\n

I think I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not properly using the Rip It Energy Fuel, because I just drank a big 16-ounce can of it and I have no urge to rip anything, not even the jurors in the Michael Jackson case or Paris Hilton.<\/p>\n

Maybe it takes a while for the effects to kick in. Maybe I have to drink another can. Maybe I have to inject it into my ass meat, like Jose Canseco did with steroids.<\/p>\n

Anyway, on the outside, the Rip It Energy Fuel looks like any old energy drink with an aggro name, aggro designed can, and its typical aggro green energy drink color. However, after I drank it, I realized that it wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t a typical energy drink. <\/p>\n

The first thing I noticed about it was its lack of bite that most energy drinks have, which was probably due to the lack of carbonation in the Rip It Energy Fuel. <\/p>\n

This was disappointing because that bite is one of the things that wakes me up when I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m trying to finish a review or if I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m trying to stay up late to watch Ronco<\/a> infomercials or the softcore porn on HBO.<\/p>\n

Another thing I noticed about the Rip It Energy Fuel was that there was almost no aftertaste. This surprised me because just like almost all Ben Affleck movies, most energy drinks with aggro names leave me with a weird aftertaste.<\/p>\n

However, the lack of bite and aftertaste made it easier to tank the big 16-ounce can of the berry and citrus flavored Rip It Energy Fuel, which tasted pretty good. Although, it doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t taste as good as The Impulsive Buy favorite, Monster Energy Drink.<\/p>\n

Anyway, so far, through this entire review I have had a blank sheet of paper in front of me and I honestly have had no urge to rip it, despite just drinking a can of Rip It Energy Fuel. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m pretty sure the caffeine, taurine, inositol, and guarana must have kicked in by now, but I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m just not feeling it.<\/p>\n

\"Rip<\/a><\/p>\n

Wait. Now that I think about it, maybe I have to try something different.<\/p>\n

Now in front of me is a picture of American Idol judge, Simon Cowell. <\/p>\n

Nope, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t feel anything…<\/p>\n

Oh, wait a minute, I feel something.<\/p>\n

RIP IT!!! <\/p>\n

DAMN FRICKIN\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 ARROGANT PRICK!!! YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU SUCK, ASSWIPE!!! HOW ABOUT I TEAR THAT SMUG LOOK OFF OF YOUR FACE!!!<\/p>\n

RIP IT!!!<\/p>\n

Oh, wow! I guess Rip It Energy Fuel does work.<\/p>\n

(Editor\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Note: The Impulsive Buy would like to thank CT from the Population Statistic<\/a> for creating The Impulsive Buy favicon, which can be found in the address bar of your browser…Hopefully.)<\/small><\/p>\n

\n

Item:<\/b> Rip It Energy Fuel
\nPurchase Price:<\/b> $1.49 (16-ounce)
\nRating:<\/b> 3.5 out of 5
\nPros:<\/b> Nice berry and citrus flavor. Cheap. Big can. Almost no aftertaste.
\nCons:<\/b> Typical green energy drink color. Lack of bite. Rip It Energy Fuel may or may not work, depending on what is being ripped. Simon Cowell.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I think I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not properly using the Rip It Energy Fuel, because I just drank a big 16-ounce can of it and I have no urge to rip anything, not even the jurors in the Michael Jackson case or Paris Hilton. Maybe it takes a while for the effects to kick in. Maybe I have […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1530],"class_list":["post-230","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-energy-drink"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":511,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2007\/08\/01\/news-you-can-now-suck-on-mothers-cansas-an-adult\/","url_meta":{"origin":230,"position":0},"title":"NEWS: You Can Now Suck On Mother’s Cans…As An Adult","author":"Marvo","date":"August 1, 2007","format":false,"excerpt":"When I think of Mother Nature, I imagine a little old lady walking on a grassy plain with cheerful birds, bunnies, and butterflies circling around her on a bright sunny day and with a few white lazy clouds here and there. The setting would be much like the default wallpaper\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Spotted on Shelves"","block_context":{"text":"Spotted on Shelves","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/spotted-on-shelves\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":333,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2006\/02\/27\/mad-croc-energy-gum\/","url_meta":{"origin":230,"position":1},"title":"REVIEW: Mad-Croc Power Peppermint Energy Gum","author":"Marvo","date":"February 27, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"The last time I checked, caffeine doesn't make anyone mad. In large doses, it may make hands tremble uncontrollably or make Robin Williams so hyperactive that you wish you had a tranquilizer gun. So why must today's review subject be called Mad-Croc Power Peppermint Energy Gum? Also, the same can\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":153,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/02\/24\/full-throttle\/","url_meta":{"origin":230,"position":2},"title":"REVIEW: Full Throttle","author":"Marvo","date":"February 24, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"(Editor's Note: It's Day Four of Reader Request Week here at the Impulsive Buy and today's review request come from Impulsive Buy stalker, akiko. She called me to find out if the Impulsive Buy could review the new Full Throttle energy drink. I said sure. 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However, after drinking a Pimp Juice and letting the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":52719,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2022\/09\/01\/ryse-kool-aid-energy-drink-review\/","url_meta":{"origin":230,"position":4},"title":"REVIEW: RYSE Fuel Kool-Aid Tropical Punch Energy Drink","author":"Sean","date":"September 1, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"What is it? RYSE Fuel is on the rise in the crowded and growing sugar-free energy drink market. 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