![\"Little](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/Little-Debbie-S%E2%80%99mores-Cake-Rolls.jpg?resize=600%2C285\" "\\"Little")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Every summer, s\u2019mores fever grips the snack food aisle like a charred marshmallow to a hot skewer. But there\u2019s a good reason only an elite corps of s\u2019mores junk food, with S\u2019mores Pop-Tarts as their patron saint, stick around after the last autumn bonfire is snowed out\u2014and it has nothing to do with seasonality.<\/p>\n
See, while any M.B.A. can throw graham, chocolate, and marshmallow flavor into a snack, it takes a wise marketer to understand that smoky, oaky, and toasted marshmallowiness is the literal and flavorful glue that holds a great s\u2019more experience together.<\/p>\n
Those who haven\u2019t read Lao Tzu\u2019s The Art of S\u2019more<\/em> end up overwhelming their treat with bland sugary fluff, a gastronomical mistake comparable to invading Russia in the winter\u2014on two fronts. And Little Debbie\u2019s new S\u2019mores Cake Rolls prove this.<\/p>\n Each individually wrapped roll is fat. I\u2019d put their girth somewhere between \u201cFudgsicle\u201d and \u201ccartoon cigar.\u201d<\/p>\n But each individually wrapped is not<\/em> phat. Most of their bulk is cream filling weight, and this barely evolved Reddi-Wip is more like aerated custard than toasted marshmallow. Heavy on the fructose and vanilla, yet lightly eggy, this vapid stuff overwhelms the rest of the S\u2019mores Cake Roll like a kid trusted to put whipped cream on his own pie slice.<\/p>\n Which is a shame, because the sponge cake itself is pretty tasty. It\u2019s better than a pillowy Twinkie\u2019s, because a S\u2019mores Cake Roll\u2019s namesake cake roll is denser and butterier, like a buttermilk pancake or some New Age cracker. It has tragically little baked graham flavor, and practically no honey notes, though, further downgrading S\u2019mores Cake Rolls\u2019 authenticity from \u201cpoorly made s\u2019more\u201d to \u201cflea market bootleg s\u2019more.\u201d<\/p>\n Oh, and the chocolate? Like one of those abstract smudges on a fancy, well-plated dish, the latticed fudge on every roll is more decorative than flavorful. If you chew your roll with the vigor of a beaver who moonlights as an MLB pitcher, you can taste some generic milk chocolate notes in the aftertaste, but it\u2019s about as compelling as coagulated Hershey\u2019s syrup.<\/p>\n Which, considering how most people make their s\u2019mores, is actually a point in Diminutive Deborah\u2019s favor.<\/p>\n Taken as a whole roll, these things aren\u2019t bad. They\u2019re just misguided. With their interesting dough, pudding-esque filling, and light icing, they taste way more like \u00c9clair Cake Rolls than anything roasted over a fire, and I think Small Deb would\u2019ve been better off advertising them as such to transcend the marshmallow white noise of s\u2019mores product competition.<\/p>\n With their aggressively saccharine cream, smothered pancake swirls, and choco-phantoms, S\u2019mores Cake Rolls aren\u2019t for me. But if you\u2019re a whipped cream whiz, \u00e9clair enthusiast, or retired clown desperately jonesing for one last pie to the face, roll on over to the snack cake aisle and get your fix.<\/p>\n The rest of us can try skewering a S\u2019mores Cake Roll over the campfire to get our fix of toastiness. I apologize in advance to Smokey the Bear.<\/p>\n (Nutrition Facts – 1 roll \u2013 260 calories, 11 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 3 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 30 milligrams of potassium, 40 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 25 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.)<\/small><\/p>\n Purchased Price:<\/b> $2.00 Every summer, s\u2019mores fever grips the snack food aisle like a charred marshmallow to a hot skewer. But there\u2019s a good reason only an elite corps of s\u2019mores junk food, with S\u2019mores Pop-Tarts as their patron saint, stick around after the last autumn bonfire is snowed out\u2014and it has nothing to do with seasonality. See, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1489,1491],"class_list":["post-23568","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-little-debbie","tag-pastries"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":20220,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2016\/06\/23\/review-nabisco-smores-chips-ahoy-cookies\/","url_meta":{"origin":23568,"position":0},"title":"REVIEW: Nabisco S’mores Chips Ahoy Cookies","author":"Vin","date":"June 23, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Ahoy-hoy! It is believed s\u2019mores were invented in 1927. Chips Ahoy (!) first hit shelves in 1963. We had to wait 'til 2016 for the first collaboration. What took so long? Just in case you live under a rock that rests under a boulder and don\u2019t know what\u2019s in a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Nabisco S'mores Chips Ahoy Cookies","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm8.staticflickr.com\/7333\/27248772344_868a4547cc_z.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm8.staticflickr.com\/7333\/27248772344_868a4547cc_z.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm8.staticflickr.com\/7333\/27248772344_868a4547cc_z.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":17130,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2014\/06\/27\/review-keebler-original-smores-sandwich-cookies\/","url_meta":{"origin":23568,"position":1},"title":"REVIEW: Keebler Original S’mores Sandwich Cookies","author":"Jack","date":"June 27, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"I have no idea how anyone ever came up with the idea for s\u2019mores. What exactly were graham crackers even good for before they were used as bread in a toasted marshmallow and melted chocolate sandwich? From its name to its ingredients, s\u2019mores remain a unique, simple campfire combination that\u2019s\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Keebler S'mores Original Sandwich Cookies","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm6.staticflickr.com\/5480\/14252852750_24d68df550.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":21393,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2017\/03\/17\/review-girl-scout-smores-sandwich-cookies\/","url_meta":{"origin":23568,"position":2},"title":"REVIEW: Girl Scout S’mores Sandwich Cookies","author":"Vin","date":"March 17, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Call me the s\u2019more connoisseur. I\u2019ve bought s\u2019mores in stores from shore to shore. Famous to obscure, I\u2019ve explored the s\u2019more tour. More or less, I\u2019ve put s\u2019mores to the test, and yes, my rhymes ARE poor and in jest. This I confess as you snore unimpressed, I\u2019ll shut up\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Girl Scout S'mores Sandwich Cookies","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/Girl-Scout-Smores-Sandwich-Cookies-1024x1024.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/Girl-Scout-Smores-Sandwich-Cookies-1024x1024.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/Girl-Scout-Smores-Sandwich-Cookies-1024x1024.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":28042,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2018\/04\/04\/review-ben-jerrys-limited-batch-gimme-smore-ice-cream\/","url_meta":{"origin":23568,"position":3},"title":"REVIEW: Ben & Jerry\u2019s Limited Batch Gimme S\u2019more Ice Cream","author":"Marvo","date":"April 4, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Yes, Ben & Jerry\u2019s already has a s\u2019mores flavor, but not why s\u2019more? 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For example, it\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/Ben-Jerrys-Limited-Batch-Gimme-Smore-Ice-Cream-2.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/Ben-Jerrys-Limited-Batch-Gimme-Smore-Ice-Cream-2.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/04\/Ben-Jerrys-Limited-Batch-Gimme-Smore-Ice-Cream-2.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":22713,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2017\/05\/29\/review-thomas-limited-edition-smores-english-muffins\/","url_meta":{"origin":23568,"position":4},"title":"REVIEW: Thomas\u2019 Limited Edition S\u2019mores English Muffins","author":"Adam","date":"May 29, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"As someone who works in the marketing department of an organization that has only discovered social media within the last year, I tend to feel an affinity with Thomas\u2019 English muffins. For years, these guys had one shtick: nooks and crannies. If sharing the same marketing platform as a dilapidated\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Thomas Limited Edition S mores English Muffins","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Thomas%E2%80%99-Limited-Edition-S%E2%80%99mores-English-Muffins.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Thomas%E2%80%99-Limited-Edition-S%E2%80%99mores-English-Muffins.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/Thomas%E2%80%99-Limited-Edition-S%E2%80%99mores-English-Muffins.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":15947,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2013\/12\/17\/review-kelloggs-smores-krave-cereal\/","url_meta":{"origin":23568,"position":5},"title":"REVIEW: Kellogg’s S’mores Krave Cereal","author":"Adam","date":"December 17, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"This time of the year, as the thermometer plummets and stuffing your hands in your crotch becomes an essential component of keeping warm, it\u2019s customary to crave traditional warm foods like chili, roasted root vegetables, and a whole host of things capable of giving your tongue a third-degree burn. Also\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Kellogg's S'mores Krave Cereal","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm4.staticflickr.com\/3767\/11408720506_4f1065cffe.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23568","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/33"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23568"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23568\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23568"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23568"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23568"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}![\"Little](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/Little-Debbie-S%E2%80%99mores-Cake-Rolls-2.jpg?resize=599%2C414\" "\\"Little")
<\/p>\n![\"Little](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/Little-Debbie-S%E2%80%99mores-Cake-Rolls-3.jpg?resize=599%2C400\" "\\"Little")
<\/p>\n
\nSize:<\/b> 6 cake rolls (13.13 oz box)
\nPurchased at:<\/b> Dollar General
\nRating:<\/b> 4 out of 10
\nPros:<\/b> Hypnotic pancake cylinders. Benevolent custard spirits. Snack cake calories not counting if you\u2019re camping. Learning that eclaire [sic] is French for \u201cenlightened.\u201d
\nCons:<\/b> Fire hoses of cloying cream. Ornamental chocolate ghosts. Geneva Convention-breaking s\u2019more crimes. Clown junkies.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"