{"id":280,"date":"2005-09-12T00:00:56","date_gmt":"2005-09-12T10:00:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/09\/12\/strawberry-milkshake-pop-tarts\/"},"modified":"2017-12-27T13:02:25","modified_gmt":"2017-12-27T23:02:25","slug":"strawberry-milkshake-pop-tarts","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/09\/12\/strawberry-milkshake-pop-tarts\/","title":{"rendered":"REVIEW: Strawberry Milkshake Pop-Tarts"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Strawberry<\/p>\n

Dear Strawberry Milkshake Pop-Tarts,<\/p>\n

Everyone goes through changes, and recently, I’ve gone through a change. During this change, I realized that you aren’t what I’m looking for. You’re not “the one.” <\/p>\n

You were delicious and you’ll always have a special place in my heart. I will always remember the great times we had. <\/p>\n

When you were hot and toasted, I liked spreading you open and licking your gooey strawberry milkshake-flavored center. When you were frozen, I enjoyed nibbling on your crust. Also, there was that time, in the heat of the moment, I tried to rip off your foil packaging to eat you, but it wouldn’t come off. We laughed as I used the scissors to get it off.<\/p>\n

You have to agree that those were some good times we had.<\/p>\n

I thought we had a lot in common, but it turned out that the only thing we had in common was both liking Green Day. Although, the only Green Day songs you knew were the ones on the American Idiot<\/i> album. I couldn’t believe you didn’t know any of the songs from Dookie<\/i>. <\/p>\n

Long View? Basket Case? When I Come Around? Welcome to Paradise?<\/p>\n

But I guess I should’ve expected that since you’re much younger than I am.<\/p>\n

Also, I didn’t realize the excessive amount of pink stuff you have. When I first met you, I thought you looked really hot in that pink outfit you wore, with pink glitter all over your body. Then the next time, you wore another pink outfit. Then another. Then another. <\/p>\n

However, I didn’t realize how much pink stuff you had until we went back to your place. It felt like I was Dumbo<\/a> seeing pink elephants<\/a> after drinking some spiked water.<\/p>\n

Oh wait. You’re too young to remember the Dumbo reference.<\/p>\n

Anyway, your place had so much pink that it made me feel like I was either in the Barbie Dream House, surrounded by cotton candy, or in Hello Kitty’s pants.<\/p>\n

Not even Pink<\/a> has as much pink stuff as you do.<\/p>\n

There’s also something else I have to admit that you might not like. I was sort of using you. <\/p>\n

You see, I really like Pop-Tarts with chocolate, but I wanted to try something different. I wanted to know if the grass was greener on the other side of the fence, but it wasn’t. I really do prefer Pop-Tarts with chocolate, especially Hot Fudge Sundae Pop-Tarts<\/a>, and I now know that, “Once you go choco-LATE, there’s no debate.”<\/p>\n

Look, these things may have bothered me, but that doesn’t mean you won’t ever find the right guy. There are many fish in the ocean and I’m sure there’s a guy out there who likes pink as much as you do and will treat you the way you deserve.<\/p>\n

Well I hope this letter hasn’t hurt you too much, but I felt that you needed to hear the truth. We may not be together, but I hope that we can continue to be friends.<\/p>\n

Love,<\/p>\n

Marvo<\/p>\n

(Editor’s Note: Thanks to Impulsive Buy readers, Zanjero, Joseph, and Lane for introducing me to Strawberry Milkshake Pop-Tarts.)<\/small><\/p>\n

Item:<\/b> Strawberry Milkshake Pop-Tarts
\nPurchase Price:<\/b> $1.69 (on sale)
\nRating:<\/b> 6 out of 10
\nPros:<\/b> Good and chewy when frozen. Good and gooey when toasted. A change from all the chocolate Pop-Tarts.
\nCons:<\/b> Way too much pink. Not better than chocolate Pop-Tarts. The grass wasn’t greener on the other side of the fence. A broken Pop-Tart heart.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Strawberry Milkshake Pop-Tarts, Everyone goes through changes, and recently, I’ve gone through a change. During this change, I realized that you aren’t what I’m looking for. You’re not “the one.” You were delicious and you’ll always have a special place in my heart. I will always remember the great times we had. When you […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-280","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":26343,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2017\/12\/29\/back-on-shelves-frosted-strawberry-milkshake-and-frosted-vanilla-milkshake-pop-tarts-2017\/","url_meta":{"origin":280,"position":0},"title":"BACK ON SHELVES: Frosted Strawberry Milkshake and Frosted Vanilla Milkshake Pop-Tarts (2017)","author":"Marvo","date":"December 29, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"Not sure if these are reformulated. But if not, here's our Strawberry Milkshake Pop-Tarts review from 2005 and Vanilla Milkshake Pop-Tarts review from 2008. (Spotted by Amanda Y at Walmart.) If you\u2019re out shopping and see an interesting new product on the shelf, snap a picture of it, and send\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Back on Shelves"","block_context":{"text":"Back on Shelves","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/back-on-shelves\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Frosted-Strawberry-Milkshake-and-Frosted-Vanilla-Milkshake-Pop-Tarts-2017.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Frosted-Strawberry-Milkshake-and-Frosted-Vanilla-Milkshake-Pop-Tarts-2017.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Frosted-Strawberry-Milkshake-and-Frosted-Vanilla-Milkshake-Pop-Tarts-2017.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":28793,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2018\/05\/18\/weekend-giveaway-plenty-of-pop-tarts-packs\/","url_meta":{"origin":280,"position":1},"title":"WEEKEND GIVEAWAY: Plenty of Pop-Tarts Packs","author":"Marvo","date":"May 18, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"I have plenty of Pop-Tarts. Perhaps, too many Pop-Tarts. So I'm going to push some of them onto a lucky TIB reader, along with a bunch of other products. So for this prize drawing, one lucky reader will receive: 2 Packs of Pop-Tarts Splitz Sugar Cookie and Brownie Batter 2\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Announcement"","block_context":{"text":"Announcement","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/general\/announcement\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/IMG_2504.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/IMG_2504.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/IMG_2504.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":823,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2008\/08\/21\/kelloggs-vanilla-milkshake-pop-tarts\/","url_meta":{"origin":280,"position":2},"title":"REVIEW: Kellogg’s Vanilla Milkshake Pop-Tarts","author":"Marvo","date":"August 21, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Vanilla is a synonym for boring and boring can best describe how I feel about the Kellogg's Vanilla Milkshake Pop-Tarts. I guess vanilla had to be the next natural progression for Pop-Tarts flavors since the Pop-Tartologists at Kellogg's have pretty much squeezed out every single chocolate flavor from the cow's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":9615,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2011\/07\/01\/review-limited-edition-frosted-cherry-turnover-pop-tarts\/","url_meta":{"origin":280,"position":3},"title":"REVIEW: Limited Edition Frosted Cherry Turnover Pop-Tarts","author":"Marvo","date":"July 1, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"When I die, I hope my tombstone doesn't say, \"Ate way too many Pop-Tarts,\" even though I have eaten way too many Pop-Tarts. 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