![\"\"](\"\/images\/dragonfiregum.jpg\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
I don’t know about you, but when I was growing up I didn’t want to have Superman’s superhuman strength, Flash’s lightning quick speed, or Wonder Woman’s stupid lasso that made people tell the truth. I wanted the special ability of shooting fire out of my mouth.<\/p>\n
Perhaps this desire was influenced by the many Godzilla movies I watched. Or maybe I wanted to be able to roast marshmallows whenever or wherever I wished. Or maybe I wanted to be the reason why people yelled, “The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire! We don’t need no water let the motherfucker burn!”<\/p>\n
I also came up with a cool name if I ever had the ability to shoot fire out of my mouth. I would’ve called myself, “Hellmouth.”<\/p>\n
Although now that I’m older and wiser, I realize that this name would either put fear into the hearts of criminals or make everyone think I had bad breath.<\/p>\n
When I received a can of Dragon Fire Gum from Impulsive Buy reader Akiko, who picked it up during her journey to the exotic land called Los Angeles, I thought it would allow me to have the fire-shooting breath to destroy a miniature version of Tokyo that I would’ve built using Legos and Jenga pieces. Instead it allowed me to have cinnamon smelling breath.<\/p>\n
Inside the can of Dragon Fire Gum was a slip of paper with the words:<\/p>\n
\nAccording to ancient oriental beliefs, dragons breathed fire to protect treasures from evil spirits. Dragon Fire’s intense hot cinnamon taste will protect you from evil breath spirits. Each piece of gum is loaded with hot imperial cinnamon and then singed to seal in the hot cinnamon flavor.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
Yeah, right. And Calgon laundry detergent is an ancient Chinese secret. <\/p>\n
So bad breath is caused by evil spirits and not by garlic, onions, smoking, having food debris trapped in your mouth, or kissing a hooker with missing teeth?<\/p>\n
If that’s the case, I don’t need gum or toothbrushes, I need either Holy Water or the Ghostbusters.<\/p>\n
The dragon design on the outside of the can was cool. However, the gum on the inside, not so much.<\/p>\n
Each Dragon Fire gum looked like a red peanut M&M with wrinkles. It also looked like it had a hard shell, but it didn’t have one. <\/p>\n
Remember the “intense hot cinnamon taste” printed on the slip of paper in the Dragon Fire Gum can? Well it was there…sometimes. Some pieces made my mouth feel like there was a party going in it, with fireworks and strippers. However, other pieces also made my mouth feel like there was a party going on in it, except with tea, crumpets, and fully-clothed nuns.<\/p>\n
\nItem:<\/b> Dragon Fire Gum
\nPurchase Price:<\/b> FREE (Received from Impulsive Buy reader Akiko)
\nRating:<\/b> 2 out of 5
\nPros:<\/b> Sugarfree. Cool looking can. Dragon would make a cool tattoo. Parties with fireworks and strippers.
\nCons:<\/b> Inconsistent cinnamon bite. Looks like it has a hard shell, but doesn’t have one. Parties with fully-clothed nuns. My inability to shoot fire from my mouth.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"I don’t know about you, but when I was growing up I didn’t want to have Superman’s superhuman strength, Flash’s lightning quick speed, or Wonder Woman’s stupid lasso that made people tell the truth. I wanted the special ability of shooting fire out of my mouth. Perhaps this desire was influenced by the many Godzilla […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[24],"class_list":["post-296","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-gum"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":144,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/02\/15\/dentyne-fire\/","url_meta":{"origin":296,"position":0},"title":"REVIEW: Dentyne Fire","author":"Marvo","date":"February 15, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m an awesome kisser. After years of practicing with my pillow, hand, and 8x10 photos of Angelina Jolie, I have taught myself to apply the perfect amounts of pressure, sucking, and tongue playing, when making out with a woman. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve done exercises that make my lips softer, help me efficiently\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":891,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2008\/09\/05\/trident-xtra-care\/","url_meta":{"origin":296,"position":1},"title":"REVIEW: Trident Xtra Care","author":"Marvo","date":"September 5, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"The new Trident Xtra Care gum is like Viagra for teeth because it makes them hard and able to handle daily pounding if taken at least three hours in advance. I've been chewing it for the past few weeks, so I think my teeth are nice and hard. Whatever comes\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":36289,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2019\/04\/30\/spotted-great-value-2019-ice-cream-flavors\/","url_meta":{"origin":296,"position":2},"title":"SPOTTED: Great Value 2019 Ice Cream Flavors","author":"Marvo","date":"April 30, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"(Spotted by Rachel C at Walmart.) (Spotted by Carla at Walmart.) Great Value has had a bubble gum flavored ice cream before. But I threw in this photo because I can't say no to the eyes of whatever that thing is on the package. An octopus with three legs? A\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Spotted on Shelves"","block_context":{"text":"Spotted on Shelves","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/spotted-on-shelves\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Great-Value-Blueberry-Cheesecake-Ice-Cream.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Great-Value-Blueberry-Cheesecake-Ice-Cream.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Great-Value-Blueberry-Cheesecake-Ice-Cream.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Great-Value-Blueberry-Cheesecake-Ice-Cream.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Great-Value-Blueberry-Cheesecake-Ice-Cream.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":52391,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2022\/08\/11\/cinnafuego-toast-crunch-review\/","url_meta":{"origin":296,"position":3},"title":"REVIEW: CinnaFuego Toast Crunch","author":"Marvo","date":"August 11, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"This CinnaFuego Toast Crunch pouch of fiery cereal that can only be purchased online at Walmart.com starting on August 12, 2022 (while supplies last) makes me scratch my head. (UPDATE: The announced date is August 12, but as I type this, it's already available for purchase on the Walmart website.)\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/08\/cftccereal3.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/08\/cftccereal3.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/08\/cftccereal3.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/08\/cftccereal3.jpeg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":426,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2006\/12\/14\/eclipse-spearmint-gum-bigepak\/","url_meta":{"origin":296,"position":4},"title":"REVIEW: Eclipse Spearmint Gum BigEPak","author":"Marvo","date":"December 14, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"(Editor's Note: Please do not attempt this at home. 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