![\"\"](\"\/images\/jambajuiceocc.jpg\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
I hate to admit this, but I have a terrible fear of Starbucks. <\/p>\n
I don’t know if it’s because of my fear of standing in long lines of grouchy people who could explode at any moment unless they get their caffeine fix or because of the urban legend that says, “For every thirteen Starbucks coffees sold, somewhere around the world a new Starbucks shop will unfold. Starbucks will continue to grow wherever there is a sign that says ‘For Lease.’ Starbucks will continue to grow until it can no longer increase.”<\/p>\n
So instead of Starbucks, I end up at Jamba Juice, with its brightly colored decor, which makes you feel like you’re either inside of a rainbow, in an Old Navy advertisement, or you’ve been staring at a tie-dye shirt for too long.<\/p>\n
I believe the unofficial slogan of Jamba Juice is, “All of the same prices and weird cup size names as Starbucks, but without the coffee-smelling farts.”<\/p>\n
During my most recent trip to Jamba Juice, I noticed that they were offering their holiday flavors, Orange Cherry Cheer and Mighty Cherry Charger.<\/p>\n
I picked up an Orange Cherry Cheer, with its cherries, freshly-squeezed orange juice, orange sherbet, soymilk and nonfat frozen yogurt. I decided to get it because I felt the brightly colored decor of the Jamba Juice didn’t make me cheery enough. <\/p>\n
Also, in order to get in touch with my feminine side, I added a Femme Boost to my smoothie, which according to the Jamba Juice website:<\/p>\n
\nJamba\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Femme Boost combines folic acid to support a healthy nervous system, calcium for strong bones, iron for healthy blood, magnesium to support a healthy heartbeat, and hormone-balancing herbs & extracts to keep you cheery all year long. As an added bonus, soy isoflavones are blended in to support reproductive health and comfort, especially during and after menopause. So power up with Jamba\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Femme Boost and let your girl power prevail!\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n
You go girl! I am woman, hear me roar! All the women who are independent, throw your hands up at me. All the honeys who makin’ money, throw your hands up at me. All the mommas who profit dollas, throw your hands up at me. All the ladies who truly feel me, throw your hands up at me.<\/p>\n
Girl power!<\/p>\n
The first thing I noticed about the Orange Cherry Cheer was the fact that it had more orange than cherry, but it had more cherry than cheer. Even with the hormone-balancing herbs & extracts in the Femme Boost, I still didn’t feel very cheery.<\/p>\n
Maybe I wasn’t so cheery because I was picking chunks of cherry seeds off of my tongue much like how I would probably have to pick off pubic hair after going down on a hairy Hungarian hooker. <\/p>\n
Despite the chunks of cherry seeds, I liked the taste of the Orange Cherry Cheer, it was kind of Orange Julius-ish. (I dare you to say Julius-ish five times in a row really fast.) Plus, no coffee-smelling farts.<\/p>\n
(Editor’s Note: Here are a couple of things you can do to have fun with Jamba Juice employees. (1) When ordering, talk REALLY fast and be very fidgety, then ask if you can add an Energy Boost to your purchase, and then say, “I’ve been feeling really sluggish today.” (2) When the cashier asks you for your name, use different names every time. Mix it up. Use names of the opposite sex. Use foreign names. Use names with more than five syllables. Use names without any vowels. Be creative.)<\/small><\/p>\n
\nItem:<\/b> Jamba Juice Orange Cherry Cheer
\nPurchase Price:<\/b> $4.55 (Original Size)
\nRating:<\/b> 3.5 out of 5
\nPros:<\/b> Tasty. Orangy. Telling the Jamba Juice employee that your name is Rico Suave. No coffee-smelling farts. Femme Boost helped me get in touch with my feminine side.
\nCons:<\/b> Not so cheery. Chunks of cherry seeds. Weird cup size names. Starbucks will soon swallow the Earth.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"I hate to admit this, but I have a terrible fear of Starbucks. I don’t know if it’s because of my fear of standing in long lines of grouchy people who could explode at any moment unless they get their caffeine fix or because of the urban legend that says, “For every thirteen Starbucks coffees […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1477,1773],"class_list":["post-300","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-fast-food","tag-jamba-juice"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":969,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2008\/09\/15\/mango-orange-peach-jamba-juicie\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":0},"title":"Mango Orange Peach Jamba Juicie","author":"Marvo","date":"September 15, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"The Mango Orange Peach Jamba Juicie seems like it is supposed to give buyers the opportunity to experience Jamba Juice whenever they want, but I feel that fruity experience goes beyond what's sucked through a straw. It's not Jamba Juice without having people judge you for the free boost you\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":10661,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2011\/11\/21\/review-jamba-juice-apple-cinnamon-cheer\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":1},"title":"REVIEW: Jamba Juice Apple Cinnamon Cheer","author":"Marvo","date":"November 21, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm a little skeptical the limited time only Jamba Juice Apple Cinnamon Cheer smoothie has the ability to cheer me up. After all, I have yet to bust a cold with Jamba's Coldbuster, achieve nirvana by drinking their Strawberry Nirvana, or get horny while sucking down a Caribbean Passion smoothie,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Jamba Juice Apple Cinnamon Cheer","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm7.staticflickr.com\/6096\/6375718969_46db7e70c8.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":16090,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2014\/01\/10\/quick-review-jamba-juice-kale-ribbean-breeze\/","url_meta":{"origin":300,"position":2},"title":"QUICK REVIEW: Jamba Juice Kale-ribbean Breeze","author":"Marvo","date":"January 10, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Purchased Price: $5.69 Size: Medium Purchased at: Jamba Juice Rating: 7 out of 10 Pros: Nice fruity flavor and tasty way to get some vegetables into your body. 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