{"id":357,"date":"2006-05-03T16:05:40","date_gmt":"2006-05-04T02:05:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2006\/05\/03\/vanilla-mint-listerine\/"},"modified":"2023-08-14T16:29:22","modified_gmt":"2023-08-15T02:29:22","slug":"vanilla-mint-listerine","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2006\/05\/03\/vanilla-mint-listerine\/","title":{"rendered":"Vanilla Mint Listerine"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/p>\n

I can hear the cries from non-Listerine users who are afraid to use it.<\/p>\n

“Wah! Wah! I can’t handle Listerine because it burns! I’m a little wuss, that can’t handle anything and I need my mommy to hold my hand, or else I’m going to cry like a little baby.”<\/p>\n

“Oh, woe is me, I can handle the burn of vodka down my throat, the wailing of Michael Bolton in my ears, but I can’t handle Listerine in my mouth.”<\/p>\n

When I was growing up, the kids on the playground had names for weaklings who couldn’t handle things like the burning sensation of Listerine. Those names included, “scaredy cat,” “the first one out in dodgeball,” “pussy,” and “Marvo.”<\/p>\n

Sure, I didn’t like the burn of Listerine, but I sucked it up, grew some balls, and got used to it. That’s how it is with Listerine, people eventually get used to the pain. Although I will admit that this technique doesn’t work with everything, like watching Jay Leno.<\/p>\n

Now thanks to the less intense Vanilla Mint Listerine, weaklings can use this Listerine to kill germs that cause bad breath, plaque, and the gum disease Gingivitis, without it feeling like they’ve just made out with Courtney Love’s cigarette or Courtney Love herself.<\/p>\n

It maybe about 30% to 50% less intense than normal Listerine, but according to the bottle, it’s equally effective. However, it maybe equally effective factually<\/b>, but personally, it doesn’t feel<\/b> like it’s equally effective. <\/p>\n

One of the great things about the original Listerine – and its various minty forms – was that intense burning sensation, which felt like it not only killed the germs that caused bad breath, but also a few tastebuds and saliva glands.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

The burn is the indicator that lets you know it’s working. The more it burns, I feel the harder it’s working. Honestly, if you found yourself one morning next to a strobelight honey<\/a> or a beer goggle prince, wouldn’t you want something that has the power to disinfect regret and get rid of the taste of whatever you put your mouth on and around. <\/p>\n

I think only the full-burning sensation of Listerine, and its equally intense minty counterparts, could provide that type of cleansing. Oh, alcohol would work as well, but the danger of alcohol would be drinking too much of it, ending up in bed the next morning with another strobelight honey or beer goggle prince, and repeating the Circle of Shame.<\/p>\n

The less intense Vanilla Mint Listerine was mintalicious, but not very vanillalicious. Its very light vanilla flavor made me wonder why Listerine bothered to put it there in the first place. The Crest Whitening Expressions Refreshing Vanilla Mint I reviewed<\/a> was much more vanilly.<\/p>\n

Anyway, the bottom line is that if you’re a wuss, then the Vanilla Mint Listerine is better for your weak ass mouth. <\/p>\n

\n

Item:<\/b> Vanilla Mint Listerine
\nPurchased Price:<\/b> $3.54 (8.5-ounces)
\nPurchased At:<\/b> The-Superstore-Behemoth-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named
\nRating:<\/b> 3 out of 5
\nPros:<\/b> Mintalicious. Less intense for wusses. Kills germs that cause bad breath, plaque, and the gum disease Gingivitis.
\nCons:<\/b> Not vanillalicious. Not intense enough for extreme people. Making up adjectives. Always being the first one out in dodgeball. Strobelight honeys. Beer goggle princes. Circle of Shame. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I can hear the cries from non-Listerine users who are afraid to use it. “Wah! Wah! I can’t handle Listerine because it burns! I’m a little wuss, that can’t handle anything and I need my mommy to hold my hand, or else I’m going to cry like a little baby.” “Oh, woe is me, I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":8,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1753],"class_list":["post-357","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-misc"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":584,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2008\/03\/13\/listerine-mint-shield-smart-rinse\/","url_meta":{"origin":357,"position":0},"title":"Listerine Mint Shield Smart Rinse","author":"Marvo","date":"March 13, 2008","format":false,"excerpt":"The lack of a burning sensation in my mouth and an absence of alcohol in the ingredients list means that the Listerine Mint Shield Smart Rinse is either made for children or cry baby pussies. Back in my little man days, I only had the original formula Listerine and when\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":7431,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2010\/10\/04\/review-listerine-zero\/","url_meta":{"origin":357,"position":1},"title":"REVIEW: Listerine Zero","author":"Marvo","date":"October 4, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"The new Listerine Zero has no alcohol in it, which means it doesn't have the usual Listerine burn that causes some to curse oral hygiene. However, I enjoy the burning sensation because if I'm suffering while swishing Listerine for 60 seconds, I can imagine how much pain those millions of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Listerine Zero","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/c1.staticflickr.com\/5\/4128\/5049727056_14173efc72_z.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":4,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2004\/08\/09\/personal-natural-citrus-listerine-mouthwash\/","url_meta":{"origin":357,"position":2},"title":"REVIEW: Natural Citrus Listerine Mouthwash","author":"Marvo","date":"August 9, 2004","format":false,"excerpt":"My first and only experience with the original Listerine came in the 1980s. The only thing I remember from that traumatic experience was the horrible burning sensation. It felt like all of my taste buds had melted away. They didn't, but since then I swear things haven't tasted right. Eventually\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Reviews"","block_context":{"text":"Reviews","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/reviews\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2004\/08\/natcitruslisterrinemouthwash-600x600.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2004\/08\/natcitruslisterrinemouthwash-600x600.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2004\/08\/natcitruslisterrinemouthwash-600x600.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":7326,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2010\/09\/20\/news-listerine-introduces-a-mouthwash-for-wusses\/","url_meta":{"origin":357,"position":3},"title":"NEWS: Listerine Introduces A Mouthwash for Wusses","author":"Marvo","date":"September 20, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Are you one of those weaklings who can't stand the burning sensation of Listerine? Before, you had two options: grow a pair or not use the mouthwash that kills germs and bacteria in your mouth that cause bad breath. But now, probably thanks to your crying and whining, you have\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Spotted on Shelves"","block_context":{"text":"Spotted on Shelves","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/spotted-on-shelves\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":263,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2005\/08\/01\/listerine-whitening\/","url_meta":{"origin":357,"position":4},"title":"Listerine Whitening","author":"Marvo","date":"August 1, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"(Editor's Note: Today's product was requested by Impulsive Buy reader Seth, who twice had the urge to buy today's product, but felt it would be better (and cheaper for him) if the Impulsive Buy tested it first. Enjoy.) 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