{"id":5465,"date":"2009-12-22T00:00:23","date_gmt":"2009-12-22T10:00:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/?p=5465"},"modified":"2020-12-11T17:25:06","modified_gmt":"2020-12-12T03:25:06","slug":"review-ed-hardy-sangria","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2009\/12\/22\/review-ed-hardy-sangria\/","title":{"rendered":"REVIEW: Ed Hardy Sangria"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"\/<\/a><\/p>\n

Ed Hardy (by Christian Audigier), the leading purveyor of fine douche-wear such as faux-tattoo print T-shirts and trucker hats, have finally taken the next logical step and created their own “V.I.F. Drinks” (which I assume stands for Very Important Fuckface) beverage line. You know, like that old saying goes: If you can do one thing shoddily, why not do a lot of things shoddily. Or something like that.<\/p>\n

Sangria isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t what is traditionally known as a “manly” thing to drink \u00e2\u20ac\u201c what with the wine and the fruity bits and whatnot. And despite the skull wearing a cowboy hat with an arrow through it and a snake sitting on top of the hat and an eagle attacking the snake and some other snakes and fruit and stuff juxtaposed about the label, Ed Hardy Sangria still doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t strike me as a particularly manly thing to drink. Like for instance, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know if I could see Jon “Fat Asian Spencer Pratt” Gosselin actually drinking Ed Hardy Sangria, but I could definitely see it as something he would offer to one of the many low-class women he attempts to bed. For anyone unfamiliar with sangria in general, here is the testimonial that can be conveniently found right on the back of the Ed Hardy Sangria bottle:<\/p>\n

Produced in Spain and popularized throughout Europe for hundreds of years, Sangria is the perfect party drink. Mixed hundreds of different ways, or just poured over ice, fruity and delicious, Ed Hardy Sangria is everyone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s favorite, fashionable party guest.<\/i><\/p>\n

Although after sampling this product, I personally don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really see how Ed Hardy Sangria can be mixed “hundreds” of ways. In fact, I can really only think of “two” different ways it can be served: In a glass by itself or in a glass with a handful of roofies mixed in. Because while real sangria is mixed with ingredients like red wine, brandy and fruit liqueurs, and packs quite a punch; Ed Hardy Sangria contains a laughable 7 percent alcohol per volume and therefore would probably not get a young lady intoxicated enough to have sexual relations with Jon Gosselin on its own.<\/p>\n

\"\"\/<\/p>\n

Likewise, Ed Hardy Sangria doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t taste particularly “alcohol-ey” either. It mostly tastes like something I would have sipped out of a little box and straw when I was in elementary school. If I had to compare it, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d say the flavor most resembles Capri Sun\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Fruit Punch. On that note, while at face value I really wanted<\/i> to hate Ed Hardy Sangria, I couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even muster up the hatred for it that I usually reserve for things that come packaged in Ed Hardy, like 33-year-old men who hit on college girls. It was sweet, but not obnoxiously or cloyingly so, like eight letters handwritten in crayon pleading for daddy to come home for Christmas \u00e2\u20ac\u201c and overall fairly innocuous. There was just nothing notable about it whatsoever, positive or negative. As far as alcoholic beverages go, it was just pure, unadulterated mediocrity.<\/p>\n

To compare it to leading competing products, I would have to say it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s definitely more pleasant-tasting than your Boone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Hill or Arbor Mist. But overall, if you were in the market for a cheap wine(-ish) product that doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t really taste much like wine, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d go with something in the Franzia family. Because not only does Franzia give you a bigger bang for your buck, but you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re also not putting your money into encouraging what could eventually be Ed Hardy brand\u00c2\u00ae breakfast cereal and Ed Hardy brand\u00c2\u00ae toilet paper.<\/p>\n

Item:<\/b> Ed Hardy Sangria
\nPrice:<\/b> $6.99
\nSize:<\/b> 750 ml.
\nABV:<\/b> 7%
\nPurchased at:<\/b> Pennsylvania State Liquor Store, Philadelphia 40th & Market Location
\nRating:<\/b> 4 out of 10
\nPros:<\/b> Was surprisingly not gross. Convenient screw-top cap. Real homemade sangria.
\nCons:<\/b> Ed Hardy, obviously. Fat Asian Spencer Pratt. Won\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get you drunk. The fact that this product even exists.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ed Hardy (by Christian Audigier), the leading purveyor of fine douche-wear such as faux-tattoo print T-shirts and trucker hats, have finally taken the next logical step and created their own “V.I.F. Drinks” (which I assume stands for Very Important Fuckface) beverage line. You know, like that old saying goes: If you can do one thing […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1440],"tags":[1613],"class_list":["post-5465","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews","tag-alcohol"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":74069,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2025\/11\/24\/dunkin-berry-sangria-refresher-review\/","url_meta":{"origin":5465,"position":0},"title":"REVIEW: Dunkin’ Berry Sangria Refresher","author":"Amber","date":"November 24, 2025","format":false,"excerpt":"Snowflakes are in the air, turkeys are on sale at the grocery store, and festive decorations are starting to spring up all around my neighborhood. 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