Hello…there I said it. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t like saying hello.<\/p>\n
I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m Jeff and what I do like is food found in gas stations, imbibing copious amounts of whiskey, and wearing blazers. I also like The Impulsive Buy. I came across this site when I was trying to track down Creamiscle Oreos and discovered their review. Ever since then, I make it a daily habit of mine to check the site and brush my teeth. I am also the newest member of The Impulsive Buy\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s ensemble of reviewers.<\/p>\n
I am one of sixteen people living in Central Florida who do not work for Disney or Universal. <\/p>\n
I work in the legal realm so you can trust me because I wear a suit, a tie, and listen to smooth jazz. My writing career consists of angry drunk texting, random scrawling on bathroom stalls, and the occasional legal memorandum. I also sweat more than the average person because of my penchant for said blazers. As a child, I grew up in my family\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s restaurant business so food has always been a passion of mine. I try everything at least once, except for brown rice sushi (if you eat that stuff, you are a jerk). <\/p>\n
While other “foodies” are foraging for mushrooms or herbs in those creepy forests, I can be found at the neighborhood 7-Eleven scavenging the aisles for that elusive limited edition release. The wafts coming from a seldom cleaned bathroom at these places never discourage me. Speaking of toilets, you can be assured of one thing: I will risk a potentially horrible bowel movement just to get a review to you dear TIB Reader. Bad poops are a small price and besides I brush my teeth.<\/p>\n
Donning shorts, a navy sports coat, and speeding at a dangerous 26 mph on my midnight blue Vespa, I am out looking for products awaiting judgment. I will be straightforward with you in my recommendations. They may not be elegant, but my reviews for TIB are going to be direct and to the point. I hope to maintain the high bar that you have all come to know from TIB. Expect me to inform you, help you, and, of course, brush my teeth. Just don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t expect me to say hello.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Hello…there I said it. I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t like saying hello. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m Jeff and what I do like is food found in gas stations, imbibing copious amounts of whiskey, and wearing blazers. I also like The Impulsive Buy. I came across this site when I was trying to track down Creamiscle Oreos and discovered their review. Ever […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":15,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[276],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9929","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-announcement"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4267,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2009\/07\/12\/announcement-want-to-write-for-the-impulsive-buy\/","url_meta":{"origin":9929,"position":0},"title":"ANNOUNCEMENT: Want To Write For The Impulsive Buy?","author":"Marvo","date":"July 12, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Do you like trying new products? Do you voice your opinion about those products to yourself in the mirror or to family members and pets who don't care what you think? How would you like an audience that cares? If so, you should apply to be a writer for The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Announcement"","block_context":{"text":"Announcement","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/general\/announcement\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":40784,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2019\/11\/12\/announcement-new-impulsive-buy-reviewer-ann\/","url_meta":{"origin":9929,"position":1},"title":"ANNOUNCEMENT: New Impulsive Buy Reviewer Ann","author":"Ann","date":"November 12, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Hello, you, scrolling through The Impulsive Buy at your desk. Good Morning! No, I\u2019m not creepily watching you through your webcam, we just have the same beloved morning routine! My name is Ann, and I\u2019m a new contributor here at The Impulsive Buy. I\u2019ve been reading TIB for years, typically\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Announcement"","block_context":{"text":"Announcement","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/general\/announcement\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":10772,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2011\/12\/06\/announcement-support-the-impulsive-buy-this-gift-giving-season\/","url_meta":{"origin":9929,"position":2},"title":"ANNOUNCEMENT: Support The Impulsive Buy This Gift Giving Season","author":"Marvo","date":"December 6, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"This holiday season, if you're planning to purchase something from Amazon for your family, friends, co-workers, or lover(s), might I suggest when you do so, you use The Impulsive Buy's Amazon link below or in the right sidebar. The Impulsive Buy's Amazon link By using The Impulsive Buy's Amazon link,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Announcement"","block_context":{"text":"Announcement","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/general\/announcement\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":18388,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2015\/04\/24\/announcement-new-impulsive-buy-reviewer-anthony\/","url_meta":{"origin":9929,"position":3},"title":"ANNOUNCEMENT: New Impulsive Buy Reviewer Anthony","author":"Anthony","date":"April 24, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Hello, Foods and Foodettes! My name is Anthony and I am proud to announce my impending reign of terror against the world of The Impulsive Buy! I've never been good at this whole \"quick autobiography\" thing, but Marvo gets what Marvo wants, so here goes nothing. I was born in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Announcement"","block_context":{"text":"Announcement","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/general\/announcement\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":7555,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2010\/10\/21\/announcement-want-to-write-for-the-impulsive-buy-2\/","url_meta":{"origin":9929,"position":4},"title":"ANNOUNCEMENT: Want To Write For The Impulsive Buy?","author":"Marvo","date":"October 21, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"For over six years, The Impulsive Buy has been the blog that thousands of procrastinating college students and bored office workers go to when they've caught up with all the panty flashes and nipple slips on The Superficial. The Impulsive Buy is the number one blog on the internet that\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Announcement"","block_context":{"text":"Announcement","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/general\/announcement\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4844,"url":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/2009\/09\/27\/announcement-new-impulsive-buy-writer-stacey\/","url_meta":{"origin":9929,"position":5},"title":"ANNOUNCEMENT: New Impulsive Buy Writer Stacey","author":"Stacey","date":"September 27, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Hello The Impulsive Buy readers! You've probably figured out by now that I'm the new writer around here, but since we didn't get to properly meet, please allow me to properly introduce myself. Hi! I'm Stacey. You may remember me from such websites as Pajiba and Webster's is My Bitch.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Announcement"","block_context":{"text":"Announcement","link":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/category\/general\/announcement\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9929","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/15"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9929"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9929\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9929"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9929"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.theimpulsivebuy.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9929"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}