The ONLY things I like to put on top of my popcorn are salt and artery-clogging buttah. Call me a purist. Call me vanilla. Call me Plain Jane. Call me your daddy. I just like my popcorn that way.
Recently, while checking out chips in the snack aisle, my peripheral vision noticed the new Orville Redenbacherâ€™s Cinnabon Popcorn.
â€œOh, dude, that sounds gross,â€ I thought to myself.
Then I thought, â€œGross enough to be the PERFECT item to review.â€
The popcorn is flavored with a cinnamon buttah and comes with a pouch of Cinnabon frosting, which you pour on top of the popcorn. Sounds good, doesnâ€™t it? Of course, I could think of another use for that Cinnabon frosting, but I donâ€™t have a lady-friend at the moment.
The first thing I noticed after opening the box was the fact that there were only TWO bags in the box. This surprised me because I couldâ€™ve sworn most boxes of microwave popcorn have four bags.
Anyway, after sticking a bag in the microwave and not burning it, I have to say that this is the first product EVER that originally made me nauseous, but I learned to love. Um, sort of like, Celine Dion.
Oh, wait. Itâ€™s the other way around. I loved Celine Dion, but I eventually became nauseous of her.
No, no, no, thatâ€™s not right. Um, Celine Dion has always made me nauseous?
Oh yeah, thatâ€™s right, she has.
Anyway, while the popcorn was popping, the cinnamon aroma of it filled the room and made me a little nauseous. However, after I added the Cinnabon frosting and began chowing it down, I felt a lot better. I guess this was due to the fact that the popcorn was actually pretty good and I couldnâ€™t stop eating it.
Thank goodness for the show Strange Love on VH1. Seeing Brigitte Neilsen and Flavor Flavâ€™s naked bodies instantly made me nauseous again and stop eating.
Because it was a Cinnabon-related product, I was hoping for a gooey mess, but all I got were Cinnabon-smelling fingers, which turned out to be frustrating.
Hours after eating the Cinnabon Popcorn, despite washing my hands several times, my fingers still smelled like Cinnabons. Although, during those several times, I did use the cheap stuff (i.e. generic Wally World hand soap).
However, when I used the good stuff (i.e. Method Green Tea + Aloe Hand Wash), which I only use for special occasions, the smell was replaced with the aroma of Method Green Tea + Aloe Hand Wash.
I wonder how many times I would have to type Method Green Tea + Aloe Hand Wash to get free stuff from Method?
Item: Orville Redenbacherâ€™s Cinnabon Popcorn
Purchase Price: $3.39
Rating: 4 out of 5
Pros: ONLY TWO BAGS IN A BOX. Not as sticky or messy as actual Cinnabons. Originally made me nauseous, but they are damn good.
Cons: Smell lingers on your fingers, unless you use Method Green Tea + Aloe Hand Wash (Come on! Send some free stuff, baby!). Celine Dion and Strange Love (shutter).