I just skimmed the Wikipedia entry about hemp and now I feel bad about eating these Food Should Taste Good Hemp Tortilla Chips.
The hemp seeds used to make these chips could’ve been used to grow more hemp plants, which in turn could’ve been used to make hemp clothing someone could’ve worn, hempcrete to build someone’s home, or hemp plastic to be used in a car.
Those hemp seeds I ate could’ve been turned into something significant and long lasting. Instead, their short, meaningless existence consisted of me eating them and then pooping them out.
From now on, I’m gonna stick to eating potato chips because what other uses for potatoes has society come up with? Powering some kid’s lame science fair project? Ammunition for a spud gun? Yeah, I don’t feel so bad about eating potato chips.
The Food Should Taste Good Hemp Tortilla Chips are made using only five ingredients: organic blue corn, high oleic sunflower and/or safflower oil, hemp seeds, corn bran, and sea salt. If you examine the chips, you can see the hemp seeds in them. The chips are a color that I like to call plastic army men green (although at some angles they looks brown) and they’re also a list of things that make it sound like the Holy Grail for Whole Foods shoppers. They’re certified vegan, certified gluten free, MSG free, not made from genetically modified ingredients, all natural, and they don’t contain artificial colors, flavors or preservatives.
I should note that I’ve never tasted hemp seeds before. Sure, I’ve been the driver of a car whose other passenger were puff-puff-passing their way through some weak ass weed, but I don’t know if second-hand weed smoke could be considered consumption of a cannabis plant. But, thankfully, the Google algorithm helped me learn hemp seeds have a nutty flavor.
The Food Should Taste Good Hemp Tortilla Chips are the size of Doritos and are a little thicker than Tostitos. At first, the hemp tortilla chips taste like normal tortilla chips, although a little bit better than Tostitos, but the hemp seed’s nuttiness eventually shows itself, although the level of nuttiness is more along the lines of a nip slip than full-frontal nudity. So if you gave these to an unsuspecting person they will probably think these are just some weird colored, but regular tasting tortilla chips.
While skimming through the Wikipedia entry about hemp, I also learned it’s a good source of omega-3 fatty acids and protein. The Food Should Taste Good Hemp Tortilla Chip’s nutrition facts say a serving of these chips provide 3 grams of protein, but the amount of omega-3 fatty acids isn’t listed anywhere. There isn’t even a ribbon or banner on the front of the packaging that says it’s a good or excellent source of omega-3 like there are on packages of salmon and some granola bars.
Room on the front of the package isn’t a problem. Look at all that white space.
I hope I’m getting some omega-3s from these Food Should Taste Good Hemp Tortilla Chips, because if I’m not getting any, I’m going to feel worse about eating them, even though they are some tasty chips. I already feel like I wasted the hemp seeds that went through my digestive system. They could’ve been used to create a hemp biofuel to fuel a hemp plastic car being driven by a person wearing hemp clothing to his or her house made from hempcrete.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 ounce/about 12 chips – 140 calories, 70 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 80 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 0 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.)
Item: Food Should Taste Good Hemp Tortilla Chips
Size: 5.5 ounces
Purchased at: Whole Foods
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Tasty. Certified vegan, certified gluten free, no MSG, not made from genetically modified ingredients, all natural, and they don’t contain artificial colors, flavors or preservatives. It’s frickin’ made with hemp. All the uses for hemp. Low sodium.
Cons: Needs to come in a bigger bag. Hemp flavor could’ve been stronger. Not sure if it provides omega-3. The hemp seeds I ate could’ve been used for better purposes.