The Impulsive Buy

REVIEW LIGHTNING ROUND (ENERGY DRINK EDITION) – 1/24/2013

Here are some quick reviews of new-ish energy drinks we’re too lazy to write full reviews for:

Item: Rockstar Recovery Tea/Lemonade
Purchased Price: $1.67
Size: 16 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Decent tasting. Lack of carbonation makes it easy to drink. Contains tea. Only 20 calories and 2 grams of sugar per can. It’s got electrolytes! 240 mg of caffeine per can.
Cons: Not an equal balance of tea and lemonade; it’s significantly more artificial lemonadey. 240 mg of caffeine would, at best, keep Arnold Palmer up for 48 hours, at worst, kill him. When it gets slightly warm the artificial sweeteners stand out more.
Other reviews: Caffeine King, Energy Drink Heaven, Caffeine! The Energy Blog

Item: Rockstar SuperSours Bubbleberry
Purchased Price: $1.67
Size: 16 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 4 out of 10
Pros: Initial bubblegum flavor was somewhat pleasant. If the 120 mg of caffeine per 8-ounce serving doesn’t wake you up, the unpleasant sourness will.
Cons: Unpleasant sour flavor at the back end ruined this drink for me. SuperSour? More like SuperSoI’mNotGoingToDrinkThisAgain.
Other reviews: Energy Drink Heaven, Caffeine King, Caffeine! The Energy Blog

Item: Monster Energy Zero Ultra
Purchased Price: $1.67
Size: 16 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: Great mild citrus flavor. My new favorite zero calorie energy drink. Better tasting than Monster Absolute Zero. No sugar. Easy to drink. Pretty textured can.
Cons: It looks like the water in my sink after I wash my face. Very slight artificial sweetener aftertaste that got stronger as the beverage got warmer. Can doesn’t specifically list the amount of caffeine per serving.
Other reviews: ED Junkie, Possessed by Caffeine, Blonde and Thinner

Item: Monster Energy Cuba Lima
Purchased Price: $2.19
Size: 16 ounces
Purchased at: 7-Eleven
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Nice lime flavor with a generic cola flavor in the background. Smooth. Looks like a rum and cola. Doesn’t taste like an energy drink. As good as pitcher Jose Lima was in 1999 with the Houston Astros.
Cons: If you love alcohol, you might be disappointed it’s non-alcoholic even though it’s based on a Cuba Libre (rum, cola, and lime). Don’t know how much caffeine is in each can. Strong lime flavor might be off-putting to some.
Other reviews: Thirsty Dudes, Screaming Energy, Blonde and Thinner

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