Category: Spotted on Shelves

Like a Jonas brother wearing a purity ring, the new DASANI essence bottled water doesn’t go all the way. It only has a touch of fruit flavor and it accomplishes this without sweeteners, preservatives or calories. It’s the equivalent of just making out in the back seat of a Trans Am. The DASANI essence (yes, that’s how it’s spelled) is similar to the Hint Water we reviewed years ago.

Some of you might be thinking DASANI already has fruit flavored water, and you would be right, but that line of bottled water has a level of flavor that is equivalent to getting to third base in the back seat of a station wagon.

The DASANI essence comes in three flavors: black cherry, strawberry kiwi and lime. It’s being sold in 18.5-ounce bottles or 16-ounce bottles in a 4-pack.

An 8-ounce serving contains 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 25 milligrams of sodium, 0 grams of carbohydrates and 0 grams of protein.

Hot off the heels of their Death Valley Chipotle Potato Chips, Kettle Brand recently introduced their Jalapeno flavored chips, which they describe as, “Striking a perfect balance between fresh, well-rounded flavor and the simple spicy bite of green jalapeno peppers.”

Being a fan of Kettle Brand Potato Chips and jalapenos (I once drank the juice from a jar of pickled jalapenos for two dollars), I’m eager to give these a try. Look for it in grocery and hippie natural food stores nationwide. They will be available in 2 oz., 5 oz., and 9 oz. bags.

A one-ounce serving contains 150 calories, 9 grams of fat, 1 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram polyunsaturated fat, 7 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 200 milligrams of sodium, 400 milligrams of potassium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 1 gram of sugar and 2 grams of protein.

Read our reviews of the other Wrigley’s 5 Gum flavors here and here.

Wrigley’s 5 Gum line, which is marketed towards teens and strokes all five of their senses hard, recently got two new additions. The new flavors, Solstice and Zing, joins Lush, Elixir, Rain, Flare and Cobalt in the Wrigley’s 5 line and in the list of names you should not name your children.

The new flavors may have names similar to their older siblings and raves, but their taste isn’t as straight forth. Lush has a fruity flavor, Elixir has a berry taste, Rain is like spearmint, Cobalt has a peppermint flavor and Flare has a cinnamon taste, but according to Wrigley, the new flavors will have a “unique, game-changing flavor experience,” which is marketing speak for it starts out as one flavor and ends up as another. Solstice starts off warm and ends up as a cool winter mint, while Zing begins sour and ends up sweet.

Look for the new flavors at your local convenience store or with all of the other impulse buys lined along the checkout counter at your favorite mega-superstore.

(Note: TIB reviewed the previous flavors. Click here to read the Lush and Elixir review. Click here to read the Rain, Flare and Cobalt review.)

Whenever I think of a protein shake, I think of those HUGE canisters of protein shake mix my old roommate used to buy from GNC to gain muscle. They came in different flavors, like chocolate and strawberry. I’m not sure how the protein shake mix worked, but I assume he gained muscle by lifting that HUGE container all the time. But I do know that soon after he made a protein shake the apartment began to reek of farts.

The Kellogg’s Special K Protein Shake takes the mixing out of the protein shake mix and is a dainty ready-to-drink protein shake for, I can only assume, women or people who like to fart. Actually, I don’t know if this product causes farting like the GNC protein shake mix does, but if it does, it will prove once and for all that women do fart, which I didn’t think they did.

The Kellogg’s Special K Protein Shake comes in three flavors: French vanilla, strawberry and milk chocolate. Each shake has around 180 calories, 5 grams of fat, 29 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 18 grams of sugar, 10 grams of protein and a whole lot of vitamins and minerals.

Starbucks recently launched a new super-premium ice cream in flavors that will be familiar to those Starbucks junkies who know the coffee giant’s menu better than the back of their hand. Of course, for those addicts it’s hard to see the back of their hand without spilling the Starbucks coffee it’s holding.

The new, perky ice cream line replaces the old, saggy ice cream line made by Dreyer’s. Unilever will produce it and make the ice cream with milk that’s free of recombinant bovine growth hormone (rBGH), just like Ben & Jerry’s — another company under the Unilever umbrella.

Again, if you have Starbucks running through your veins and exiting you through your urethra, the flavors that make up the new ice cream line will be familiar to you:

Caramel Macchiato – Swirled coffee and vanilla ice creams with ribbons of golden caramel.

Mocha Frappuccino – Swirled coffee and chocolate ice creams.

Java Chip Frappuccino – Coffee ice cream with dark chocolaty chunks.

Coffee – Swirled coffee and espresso ice creams.

Pints will be available at your favorite grocer, convenience store or superstore monstrosity for a suggested retail price of $3.99.

(Update: Read our review of the coffee flavor here.)