Hey ladies! Nestle wants to make “warm chocolatey memories” with you. How do I know? Because they say so on every envelope of their Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa Mix.
Ha! I laugh at Nestle’s poor attempt to make warm chocolatey memories with women.
Do you women want warm chocolatey memories that you’ll never forget? Well just stick of bottle of chocolate syrup into the microwave for 30 seconds, grab a Costco-sized bag of mini marshmallows, tear open a box of graham crackers and get ready to turn my body into human s’mores.
Oh wait. Did I say warm chocolatey memories that you’ll never forget?
I meant to say warm chocolatey memories that will forever be etched into your brain and haunt you every time your eyelids close, like a hairy, chocolate-covered Freddy Krueger. Now that I’ve got that image in your head, ladies, perhaps to cope you should cuddle with a mug of Nestle Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa, a women’s magazine and watch The Notebook.
Or guzzle a bottle of tequila.
The Nestle Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa Mix is like a women’s multivitamin, except in liquid chocolatey form, which makes it easier to swallow than a multivitamin. It contains 25 percent of a woman’s recommended daily intake of vitamin A, vitamin E, vitamin B12 and vitamin B6; 30 percent of vitamin C and iron; and 35 percent calcium. It’s also 99.9 percent caffeine free, which is disappointing if someone was looking for a quick pick-me-up. Although if one were to add a bit of Kahlua, it could turn into a quick pick-me-up, which I like to call Wild Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa.
Without alcohol, the Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa pretty much has the same pleasant chocolatey flavor as regular Nestle Hot Cocoa, although I think it might be slightly creamier. I also whipped up a serving using vanilla soy milk, which made it taste significantly better. The six-ounce serving each envelope makes is awfully small, but it’s a common serving size when it comes to hot cocoa mixes.
Because the Nestle Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa Mix is made for women, I expected it to make me cry like The Notebook does when Allie remembers who Noah is one last time and they pass away together in her bed holding hands. But, thankfully, it didn’t.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 envelope – 80 calories, 25 calories from fat, 3 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat*, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of sodium, 14 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, 1 gram of protein, 25% vitamin A, 35% calcium, 25% vitamin E, 25% vitamin B12, 30% vitamin C, 30% iron and 25% vitamin B6.)
*uses partially hydrogenated coconut or palm oil
Item: Nestle Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa Mix
Price: $2.99 (on sale)
Size: 8 envelopes
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Pleasant chocolatey flavor. Nice amounts of vitamins and minerals that women need. Easier to swallow than a multivitamin. Wild Women’s Wellness Hot Cocoa. Allie and Noah being together forever.
Cons: Small six ounce serving size. 99.9 percent caffeine free. Doesn’t create warm chocolatey memories. Contains less than 0.5 grams of trans fat. The image of my body covered in chocolate sauce, mini marshmallows and graham crackers.
