Tag: Baked Goods

REVIEW: Tastykake Pumpkin Spice Mini Donuts

Marvo

Tastykake Pumpkin Spice Mini Donuts

I imagine these Tastykake Pumpkin Spice Mini Donuts would be great to dunk into a pumpkin spice-flavored coffee, hot cocoa, melted ice cream, egg nog, yogurt, or whatever random pumpkin spice product I’d hit if I threw a rock at a Target grocery section.

Dunking it would up the pumpkin spiciness, which is something I feel these donuts need. Eaten sans dunking sauce, the pumpkin spice flavor isn’t where I’d want it to be. It’s as if someone did a pumpkin spice seasoning challenge, failed, coughed out all that pumpkin spice, forming a cloud, and then these donuts were seasoned by throwing them through that cloud.

Look, I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. We don’t experience fall like a lot of you. It’s like spring/summer all the time. If I can’t experience fall with my eyes or with my shoulder muscles from raking all the orange leaves in my yard, I want to experience fall with my mouth and I don’t think these donuts have that level of flavor.

With that said, they aren’t so bad that they make me want to fly across the Pacific Ocean, go to the Tastykake headquarters, and drop the bag above on their welcome mat with a Post-It Note attached that has the word “NOPE” scrawled on it.

Tastykake Pumpkin Spice Mini Donuts 2

They’re okay, but they don’t make me want to turn my arm into a donut dunking robot that helps me eat through an entire bag within 10 minutes. There’s an acceptable amount of cinnamon flavor in the powdered coating and I could taste other spices. But, again, I wish it was amped up a little. They’re also dense donuts and almost as chewy as brownies or original PowerBars that have been in a car’s glove compartment. I’m not sure that’s a good thing.

I’ll definitely finish off the bag, although not quickly. And I’ll dunk them into pumpkin spice hummus if the rock I throw at a Target grocery section hits it.

Disclosure: I received a free sample of these donuts from Tastykake. Receiving them for free did not affect this review in any way.

(Nutrition Facts – 4 donuts – 230 calories, 100 calories from fat, 11 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 3.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 260 milligrams of sodium, 31 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: Free
Size: 10 oz bag
Purchased at: Received from Tastykake
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Not horrible. Cinnamon-y. So many pumpkin spice products.
Cons: Too light pumpkin spice flavor. Chewier than most donuts I’ve had. Throwing rocks in a Target. So many pumpkin spice products.

REVIEW: Pillsbury Grands Limited Edition S’mores Rolls

Tiffany 4 Comments

Pillsbury Grands Limited Edition S'mores Rolls

The Pillsbury Doughboy is back at it again but this time on the s’mores bandwagon and he’s totally woo-hooing for the wrong team! Like most bandwagoners, it’s not entirely his fault. He’ll soon realize that s’mores-flavored products are quickly joining the ranks of other craze-du-jour-flavored products. Cue the lineup of failed Pumpkin Spice, Red Velvet, Apple-flavored products because it’s all hype & poor execution, buddy!

I’m sad to share that the Limited Edition Pillsbury Grands S’mores Rolls are no exception. To sum up the experience: shaky start, better second half but ultimately still couldn’t deliver.

Here’s the play-by-play:

After the satisfying Pillsbury packaging pop, a pungent chocolate-esque smell creeps its way into my olfactory receptors. I say chocolate-esque because it smells like most artificial packaged chocolate smells: sickeningly sweet and nothing like what real chocolate smells like. Offensive foul for the Doughboy.

As the dough oozes its way out of the popped container, I am geeking out a little bit about the icing packaging. I was wondering how Pillsbury would fit icing in their neat cylindrical package. While it does mean I’m one roll short, the icing itself is packaged like it’s a part of the dough roll – in a small, plastic cylindrical container at the end. Clever!

Of course, I can’t help but try the white icing goop. It unfortunately and fortunately doesn’t taste like anything. I say unfortunately because if this is supposed to be the marshmallow part, it fails miserably like an airball. I also say fortunately because I’ve been known to eat all icing before it actually makes it onto the baked good.

The naked, uneven dough plops look really unappetizing on the baking sheet. They’re different sizes because it was hard to rip apart evenly. Sloppy pass here, Pillsbury.

The packaging says to bake for 23 – 29 minutes so I set my oven timer for 26 minutes – middle ground is safe right?! While the rolls were baking, the chocolate filling actually started to smell like my favorite thing in the world: fresh baked cookies! I could smell the chocolate filling warming up from artificial chocolate to rich deliciousness.

Pillsbury Grands Limited Edition S'mores Rolls 2

After some risin’ and golden brownin’, the rolls come out looking way better than how they looked going in. However, I immediately notice that it’s a little crispy on the outside. This could absolutely be user error, but this never happens with the biscuits!

Before I begin the daunting task of icing the 350 degree Fahrenheit swirls, I try the roll sans icing. Gnawing my way through the sweet chocolate filling, I notice that there’s a slight savoriness to the dough itself – very reminiscent of Pillsbury biscuits. That biscuit-like savoriness proves to be the saving grace for the tasteless icing. When I do canvas on the icing, like Durant and Westbrook, the icing and more-savory dough work real well together.

Pillsbury Grands Limited Edition S'mores Rolls 3

However, the icing to roll ratio is completely off; I only got through about three rolls before I ran out of icing. When I ran out, I turned to ice cream instead. I’m all about textures and temperatures and ice cream is the perfect complement. Icing, schmicing!

Pillsbury Grands Limited Edition S'mores Rolls 4

While Pillsbury has a strong overall record, the Limited Edition Pillsbury Grands S’mores Rolls just can’t pull off the W. The dough itself is hard to work with and over bakes way too easily. Its teammates – chocolate filling and icing – can’t make up for the dough’s overpowering oafishness. As Limited Edition S’mores Rolls fades into irrelevance, I’ll be posted up at Cinnabon. Better luck next limited edition season!

(Nutrition Facts – 1 Roll with Icing – 300 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 540 milligrams of sodium, 54 grams of carbohydrates, 22 grams of sugar, and 5 grams of protein..)

Purchased Price: $3.49
Size: 17.5 oz.
Purchased at: Vons
Rating: 4 out of 10
Pros: Rolls come out looking & smelling way better baked. Smells like fresh baked cookies! Savory dough works well.
Cons: Artificial chocolate = offensive foul for the Doughboy. Naked, uneven dough plops. Icing, schmicing!

Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets

Marvo 39 Comments

Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets

Oh, hello there. Benjamin Franklin here, but please feel free to call me “Benji.”

Being a founding father of America and having my signature on both the United States Constitution and The Declaration of Independence, I get some perks here in heaven. For example, because I loved doing experiments with lightning when I was alive, I sometimes get to create lightning storms.

Although, I haven’t recently because I accidently struck a few people on a golf course in Utah. I kind of find it ironic that I, the inventor of the lightning rod, struck a couple of people holding lightning rods in the form of golf clubs.

Anyway, another perk I get here up in heaven is getting to enjoy delightful food from my beloved colony…Um, I mean…state of Pennsylvania, like the Philly Cheesesteak, stromboli, and lots of Hershey’s chocolate.

The Pennsylvanian food product that I’m most intrigued with is the Tastykake. I’m intrigued by it because it’s the only snack-sized, pre-packaged, and mass-produced pastry that has a name that gives me a clear picture of what I’m about to eat…A tasty cake.

It’s also one of the few snack-sized, pre-packaged, and mass-produced pastries that has a name that doesn’t sound like something I would be offered in sexual explicit spam emails, like HoHos, Ding Dongs, and Twinkies.

Plus, by eating Tastykakes, it doesn’t give Thomas Jefferson the opportunity to quip, “You know, Benji. You are what you eat.” He always says that whenever I eat a HoHo, a Ding Dong, or a Twinkie.

Jefferson is a dear friend, but he’s such a crazy guy.

Did you know that he’s to blame for the crack in the Liberty Bell? There are all kinds of theories behind it, but the truth is that Jefferson wanted to turn the Liberty Bell into a beer funnel, or what the young people of today call a “beer bong.”

So he grabbed Samuel Adams, who supplied the beer, and myself, who held the bell upside down while he tried to bore a hole into the Liberty Bell. Unfortunately, the hole caused a crack and all the beer spilled onto Jefferson. Oh, it was a sight to behold. Good times. Good times.

Anyway, recently I tried the Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets, which are Twinkie-sized pieces of sponge cake with butterscotch icing on top. It sounded wonderful, it had a nice moist texture, it wasn’t too sweet, and it tasted all right, but I was slightly disappointed with them because they didn’t seem to have a butterscotch taste at all. However, for some reason, I did detect a slight beef jerky aftertaste.

Besides the beef jerky aftertaste, another thing that disturbed me about the Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets happened when I placed one on top of two sheets of paper for about 30 seconds. When I lifted it off of the paper it left an oily mark on it. I wouldn’t have noticed this if I had a plate, but heaven has no plates thanks to Jefferson’s attempts to balance spinning plates on sticks.

As I said previously, that Jefferson is a crazy guy.

Item: Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets
Price: FREE
Purchased at: Received free from co-worker Lia
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Yum…Icing. Moist texture. Not insanely sweet. Decent tasting. Benjamin Franklin. Thomas Jefferson. The Declaration of Independence. The United States Constitution.
Cons: No butterscotch taste. Beef jerky aftertaste. Leaves oily mark when placed on paper. Being called a HoHo, Ding Dong, or Twinkie by Thomas Jefferson.