REVIEW: Limited Edition Gingerbread belVita Breakfast Biscuits

Limited Edition Gingerbread belVita Breakfast Biscuits

Is it just me, or have the food companies gotten lazy with their limited-edition offerings?

The big holiday flavors this year appear to be hot cocoa and gingerbread. For hot cocoa, all you do is take chocolate – usually an already existing flavor – and add marshmallows. It doesn’t even have to be hot, yet it still qualifies as hot cocoa.

Gingerbread is a little more innovative, but not much. It seems like most brands that have gingerbread also have pumpkin spice. Just swap out the pumpkin for molasses (if it even had pumpkin in the first place), add some ginger (if it didn’t already have some), and boom. Gingerbread.

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Unfortunately, these Limited Edition Gingerbread belVita Breakfast Biscuits are another lazy product. To me, they taste just like the pumpkin spice variety. (In fairness, I did not compare them side by side.)

They have a vague spiciness, and if I concentrate, I can taste the ginger. But I don’t taste molasses, even though it’s in the ingredients list.

Limited Edition Gingerbread belVita Breakfast Biscuits 3

Here’s the problem I see: Gingerbread is a cookie, right? And breakfast biscuits are basically cookies, right? It shouldn’t be hard to make a cookie taste like a cookie. Yet these don’t taste like gingerbread.

I understand that it might not be practical to put in too much molasses. Gram for gram, these biscuits have less sugar than a lot of cereals, and if they put in molasses, it might exceed their desired sugar count—they would switch from being breakfast biscuits to being dessert biscuits. Plus, molasses is one of those weird ingredients with a distinctive, almost pungent, odor.

But at the very least, they could have stepped up their game with the spices. Ginger is the only spice mentioned by name in the ingredients, and the biscuits would have benefitted from actual cinnamon, nutmeg, and/or clove -— not just whatever is in “natural flavor.”

If these were simply marketed as a new belVita flavor that is not gingerbread, I would give them a 7 or 8. They have a pleasant oaty flavor and a satisfying crispness. They might not be enough as a meal, but they’re fulfilling as a snack. You get that preschool nostalgia of eating graham crackers, yet feel like an adult because they’re not actually graham crackers. I like ’em.

But since they call themselves gingerbread, they set a higher standard —- a standard they fail to reach.

(Nutrition Facts – 4 biscuits (50 grams) – 230 calories, 80 calories from fat, 9 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 200 milligrams of sodium, 95 milligrams of potassium, 35 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein..)

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 8.8 oz. box (5 packs)
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Cute packaging. A tasty, satisfying biscuit. You can taste the ginger if you concentrate. Pretending cookies are breakfast.
Cons: Doesn’t taste like gingerbread. Lazy limited edition foods.

REVIEW: Nabisco Limited Edition Pumpkin Spice belVita Breakfast Biscuits

Nabisco Limited Edition Pumpkin Spice belVita Breakfast Biscuits

As lawn mowers, economic theories, and the fearsome Krang all prove, things that prevail are not simple.

Pumpkin spice is another one of those things.

Indeed, pumpkin spice requires subtly, nuance, a cautious hand. The nutmeg/cinnamon/ginger blend must be parceled out in a way that is generous rather than overexposed, compassionate rather than grating. When treated appropriately, pumpkin spice should perform one task and one task alone: highlighting the earthy-sweet qualities of the squash for which it was named. To do otherwise is but a fiasco, and me? I prefer to avoid fiascos, especially at 7:00 a.m., so I’m counting on you, belVita, to avoid another fiasco. Don’t let me down.

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It can be hard to appreciate the belVita biscuit. I once stood firm in such a belief, excusing the flimsy crackers as a half-hearted granola bars stuck in a midlife crisis. That was until, after 18 days abroad in which 82 percent of my diet subsisted on such cracker-biscuits, I realized: these are just giant, non-animal-shaped Teddy Grahams.

Sure, they may contain oats and lack the inherent charm that comes with gnawing the ears off a biscuit shaped like a carnivorous mammal, but I was being given a hall pass to eat a giant, crunchy cookie for breakfast. My life choices (and sugar intake) would be forever altered.

And these biscuits hold the same qualities I found appealing in that initial experience: crunchy, thin, and tasting of cinnamon, sugar, and toasted oats. While not high in fat, there’s just enough of the oily stuff to give a good crumble to the texture while still providing a sturdy backbone should you choose* to spread them with peanut butter or dip them in your morning coffee-and-cream.

*You should choose.

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It was mid-way through my second biscuit that it struck.

“What is that? That flavor?? Is that…????”

I squinted my eyeball and shoved it up real close to the box, pretending I didn’t look like a mildly insane, cookie-scarfing clown with cataracts.

There. Yes, right there, in the ingredients: dried pumpkin. I had my doubts, but there it was, both in the ingredients and the taste. Alongside that pumpkin, there’s little hint of nutmeg, perhaps even a spicy zing from ginger. These spices combine with the oat-y biscuit to keep the Beta-carotene-infused flavor of the pumpkin in check. If I search my memory, the whole experience harkens back to that piecrust that was left after I scooped all the pumpkin filling out: crunchy, sugary, with just a hint of pumpkin. This is just like that, only without the negative moral repercussions that come with scooping the pumpkin innards from a pie.

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It’s easy for a company to use the celebrity powers of pumpkin spice for evil. Indeed, with the blend’s unstoppable presence in everything from Shredded Wheat to Yankee Candles, it takes a special determination to give the flavor the gentle hand it deserves.

While these aren’t groundbreakingly perfect (they certainly don’t keep me for the 4 hours promised), they are well-done. What with their light spices, sugary oat crunch, and mild pumpkin presence, it’s an honest biscuit. And, in a world in which pumpkin spice is flung willy-nilly, that honesty is worth something. Good on you, belVita, for putting one less pumpkin spice disaster into the world.

Now, if we could just do something about the Pumpkin Spice Jell-O…

(Nutrition Facts – 4 biscuits – 230 calories, 70 calories from fat, 8 gram of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 220 milligrams of sodium, 95 milligrams of potassium, 36 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.)

Item: Nabisco Limited Edition Pumpkin Spice belVita Breakfast Biscuits
Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 5-packk
Purchased at: Publix
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Crispy. Crunchy. Oat-y. Well-balanced spices. Actual pumpkin included. Reason to eat cookies for breakfast. Good with peanut butter. Reflecting on the complexities of lawn mowers and the maniacal Krang.
Cons: Doesn’t sustain energy for 4 hours. Would be more fun if it were shaped like an animal. Midlife crisis. Negative moral repercussions. Mildly insane clowns with cataracts.

QUICK REVIEW: Nabisco belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits (Banana Bread and Cinnamon)

Nabisco belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits (Banana Bread and Cinnamon)

Purchased Price: $2.98 each
Size: 5 breakfast biscuits
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Banana Bread)
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Cinnamon)
Pros: They smell wonderful and look good enough. Banana Bread flavor tastes pleasant and real. Cinnamon has a mild flavor with a hint of raisin. Soft like fresh cookie and not as dry as some other oatmeal treats. Has B vitamins and five grams of fiber. No HFCS or partially hydrogenated oils.
Cons: Regular crunchy belVita is better. Makes crumbs when grubbing on the go. A bit dry. Oh, geez, don’t dunk them in milk unless you like instant mush. Made on equipment that processes nuts. Dreaming that they came out with a pumpkin bread or apple variety.

Nabisco belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits (Banana Bread and Cinnamon) Comparison

Nutrition Facts: Banana Bread – 190 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 9 grams of sugar, 3 grams of protein, and a few vitamins and minerals. Cinnamon – 190 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 9 grams of sugar, 3 grams of protein, and a few vitamins and minerals.

Nabisco belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits Banana Bread

QUICK REVIEW: Nabisco Mixed Berry belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits

belVita Soft Baked Mixed Berry Breakfast Biscuits

Purchased Price: $3.00 (on sale)
Size: 5 breakfast biscuits
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Good source of fiber. Moist. The Oats & Chocolate one tasted like a Fig Newton, but this one tastes even more so (which isn’t really a bad thing since I do enjoy them). Contains dried blueberries, raspberries, and cranberries. Doesn’t contain HFCS, artificial sweeteners, or partially hydrogenated oil. Better for you than a Pop-Tart.
Cons: Mixed Berry? More like Nixed Berry because there weren’t many of them. Makes a helluva lot of crumbs; probably not best to eat in the car unless you vacuum it every day. The way belVita is spelled. Makes my fingers slightly greasy. Strawberry must be pissed about it being left out.

belVita Soft Baked Mixed Berry Breakfast Biscuits Closeup

Nutrition Facts: 1 pack – 190 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 4 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 75 milligrams of potassium, 33 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, 3 grams of protein, 10% thiamin, 10% niacin, 10% iron, 10% riboflavin, and 10% vitamin B6.

QUICK REVIEW: Nabisco Oats & Chocolate belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits

Nabisco Oats & Chocolate belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits

Purchased Price: $3.00 (on sale)
Size: 5 breakfast biscuits
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Soft and chewy. Has a mild Fig Newton-like flavor (I like Fig Newtons). One bar has five grams of dietary fiber. Contains no high fructose corn syrup, partially hydrogenated oils, artificial sweeteners, or artificial flavors. Easy to eat on the go.
Cons: Chocolate is in the right place in its name because there’s way more oat than chocolate flavor. Having five biscuits irks my even number tendencies. Eating lots of bacon would probably negate the nutritious side of these breakfast bars. Having to find other things to eat for complete breakfast. B vitamins help convert food into energy, but is only 10 percent of your daily recommended allowance enough?

Nabisco Oats & Chocolate belVita Soft Baked Breakfast Biscuits Closeup

Nutrition Facts: 1 pack – 200 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 4 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 85 milligrams of potassium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, 3 grams of protein, 10% thiamin, 10% niacin, 10% iron, 10% riboflavin, and 10% vitamin B6.