How does Hungry-Man stay in business?
It’s one of those questions that no one knows the answer to, like why don’t the paparazzi’s cameras break after taking pictures of Paris Hilton’s vagina as she slides out of a car? There’s so much saturated fat and sodium in their foods that I wonder how they still have customers who are alive. Hungry-Man is the only brand that makes fast food restaurants say, “Ugh…you’re going to eat that shit?”
The numbers found in the nutrition facts of a Hungry-Man product read more like test scores than anything else. 81 percent saturated fat? That’s a B- in Heart Disease. You’re on your way to college. Oh wait, I read that wrong. I meant to say “collapse.” You scored a 1040 on your SAT test. Woo hoo! Oh wait, it’s 1040 milligrams on your SALT. The new Hungry-Man Angus Beef Charbroil XXL Sandwich continues the long tradition of Hungry-Man products by providing people with microwaveable meals that are full of saturated fat, sodium and regret.
I know what you’re thinking when you’re looking at the picture above. You think I should get that looked at by a physician, because it doesn’t look healthy. But that is not a growth, that is the Hungry-Man Angus Beef Charbroil XXL Sandwich. Stare at it. Let all of that disgustingness sink in. Let it haunt your nightmares.
Despite how horribly unhealthy Hungry Man products are, they also, I hate to admit, tend to be somewhat tasty, and that was the case with this big slab of ground Angus beef with cheese and a sesame seed bun. By fat…I mean, by far, this burger comes nowhere near the quality, no matter how crappy it is, of a fast food burger, but against other frozen burgers I’ve had, it’s good. The burger’s size is quite hefty and makes the Whopper seems a little small. As you can see in the disgusting picture above that will haunt you while you sleep, the Angus patty is thick and significantly bigger than the sesame seed bun.
The patty had a nice meaty flavor that was seasoned nicely and the cheese seemed like it was just there for decoration because it didn’t add any flavor. As for the bun, it was hard and chewy in most places, but for a microwaveable burger that is par for the course. All of this equate to a burger that provides 700 calories, 81 percent of your daily recommended allowance for saturated fat and 1040 milligrams of sodium.
Again, you can get a much better tasting burger at a fast food place, and maybe slightly healthier too. With some drive-thru windows open 24 hours, there’s really no excuse to purchase the Hungry-Man Angus Beef Charbroil XXL Sandwich, unless you really want to keep Hungry-Man in business.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 sandwich – 700 calories, 41 grams of fat, 16 grams of saturated fat, 1.5 grams of trans fat, 75 milligrams of cholesterol, 1040 milligrams of sodium, 55 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 8 grams of sugar, 29 grams of protein, 4% vitamin A, 6% vitamin C, 20% calcium and 20% iron.)
Item: Hungry-Man Angus Beef Charbroil XXL Sandwich
Price: $3.00 (on sale)
Size: 8 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Big ass patty. Decent tasting. One of the better frozen burgers I’ve had. 1/2 a pound of food. Great source of protein.
Cons: Bun was hard and chewy. 1/2 of your arteries will be clogged. 81% of your daily allowance of saturated fat. Useless addition of cheese. 1.5 grams of trans fat. You can get significantly better burgers at a fast food joint. The picture of it will haunt you in your sleep.