REVIEW: Turkey Hill Mystery Flavor Frozen Dairy Dessert

Turkey Hill Mystery Flavor Frozen Dairy Dessert Tub

Mystery flavor Doritos in plain silver bags marked only with test numbers. Mystery flavor Mtn Dew VooDEW that creeps around for Halloween. That one time Oreo made a mystery flavor that turned out to be Fruity Pebbles with a chocolate cookie. These are some of the many notable mysteries in junk food history, and to kick off the new year, we have a game-changing mystery on our hands — mystery ice cream.

Never, in all my years of scooping, have I heard of a mystery flavor ice cream. For 2022, Turkey Hill invites customers to grab this 48-ounce container of its finest frozen dairy dessert, scan the QR code (or visit www.turkeyhill.com/mysteryflavor), and try their hand at solving the creamy puzzle for a chance to win free Turkey Hill ice cream for life. If you want to go down this rabbit hole yourself, it’s time to turn away because detective Sean has arrived, and it’s spoiler season.

Technically this isn’t ice cream. Due to its lower milk fat content, it’s considered frozen dairy dessert, but I’ll refer to it as ice cream in this review because that’s how most people view it. Since it’s lower fat and far lighter than anything with any premium tag attached, the texture is a bit airy and fluffy. Although fluffed out, it has a decently lush mouthfeel, with a smooth creaminess that intensifies the more it tempers. Sometimes frozen dairy desserts have a wateriness and lack any depth of flavor, but that’s not the case here, and I’m pleasantly surprised.

So what IS the flavor?

Turkey Hill Mystery Flavor Frozen Dairy Dessert Top

It’s a bit of a letdown. It’s a white base with a blueberry swirl, and that’s it. When I say “white base,” I mean that it’s kind of hard to nail down because it’s not jumping out with anything notable. Again, it has a pretty decent mouthfeel that reminds me of something richer than it is, like cream cheese or even cheesecake, but it isn’t too tangy. It’s also not floral like a proper vanilla bean, so the base flavor lacks character beyond its surprising texture.

Turkey Hill Mystery Flavor Frozen Dairy Dessert Top 2

The swirl is just okay. Slightly tart with a fruit-meets-candy blueberry taste that reminds me a bit of Pop-Tarts without going fully processed. My issue with the swirl isn’t in the taste though, it’s in the quantity and texture. There isn’t nearly enough of it, both in terms of density and actual thickness, to bring any real textural character to the decent but un-exciting base. There are some denser pockets towards the middle of the container, but in those thicker slabs, a more noticeable iciness comes through, a common problem with fruity swirls that take away from the smoothness.

Turkey Hill Mystery Flavor Frozen Dairy Dessert Middle

So the answer to the mystery is — blueberry? Maybe blueberry cheesecake? Blueberries and cream? Having only one swirl is a massive missed opportunity from Turkey Hill to make something more complex and fun. Add in a graham cracker swirl and a slightly more complex base and this could be a fantastic low cal Blueberry Cheesecake. Amplify the vanilla and add in a regular crust or streusel swirl and it’s an excellent Blueberry Pie a La Mode. But as it stands? It’s a really fun idea that falls flat to deliver on the excitement it promised via the cool and mysterious magnifying glass on the carton.

Turkey Hill Mystery Flavor Frozen Dairy Dessert Scoop

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product sample from Turkey Hill. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 48 ounces
Purchased at: Received from Turkey Hill
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2/3 cup, 90g) 150 calories, 3.5 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 95 milligrams of sodium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 21 grams of total sugars, and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW Limited Edition 2021 Mtn Dew VooDEW

Limited Edition 2021 Mtn Dew VooDEW Cam

“This is, as you may recognize, a review for a mystery flavor beverage. That means the author will most likely try to explain what flavor they experienced and it might influence you to taste that flavor. If you don’t want to be spoiled, turn back now. Consider this your spoiler alert warning. Otherwise, proceed with caution or you might just be the next person in The Impulsive Buy Zone.”

-Rod Sterling (probably)

Normally when I write reviews, I will do extensive history searches for the item(s), but I wanted to go in absolutely blind with this. Googling anything risked me being spoiled.

Limited Edition 2021 Mtn Dew VooDEW Grim

The first thing that caught my eye was the can’s design. Despite being a Halloween item, the cool blues and yellow accent felt oddly out of place. The art with the grim reaper looks very cool with lots of little easter eggs of the number 3 all over. Mtn Dew has nailed a really cool and cohesive brand design these past few years.

Opening it and taking a sniff, I was slapped with (what my brain perceived to be) fruit punch smell. Taking a sip, however, yielded a whole other experience. The initial sip was a sugar shock. I don’t drink a ton of sugary beverages, so when I do it takes my taste buds a few seconds to move past the first sugar rush. After a moment, I was able to start working through the flavor. It was so familiar and at the tip of my tongue.

I poured the rest into a cup with ice and sipped it while trying to distract myself. It was here that I noticed its cloudy white color. The lack of color made my brain even more confused as to what it was tasting. I figured if I wasn’t actively TRYING to figure it out, it would come to me. Then, as if I discovered a new element, I exclaimed, “BLUE RASPBERRY!”

After being more or less sure of this, I sought out some history on the previous versions of this mystery beverage. The first release in 2019 was revealed to be candy corn and 2020 was fruit candy explosion (Skittles). It was also then that I learned the packaging had given hints in previous years as to what the flavor was with its color scheme.

Limited Edition 2021 Mtn Dew VooDEW Glass

Once again, I had an epiphany: the flavor is blue raspberry taffy. Three reasons I believe this to be right: The pattern of the flavors seem to be candy, the can itself is supposed to give a hint (and it’s blue raspberry blue), and going with the theme of three’s the name Blue Raspberry Taffy is three words. Okay, the last reason might be a little odd but I’m sticking with the pattern of threes here.

My only real complaint is that initial overpowering sweetness, but that’s totally a me thing. Putting it over ice allowed me to really taste the flavor, not just the sugar. I’m so excited to see more people try and share what they taste because I just know that it’s probably going to be all over the board. However, we’ll find out on October 31st what the flavor is from Mtn Dew. I will save a can to (hopefully) cheers my being right.

Purchased Price: $4.98 (12-pack)
Size: 12 oz can
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 can) 160 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 55 milligrams of sodium, 44 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 44 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Yoplait Go-Gurt Mystery Flavor

Yoplait has introduced a mystery flavor Go-Gurt. A staple of school lunches everywhere, I applaud Yoplait’s efforts to add some mystery and wonder for kids who bring home lunches. Why should kids who line up for the cafeteria’s Tuna Surprise be the only ones to question what they’re really eating?

Yogurt is so ubiquitous on supermarket shelves these days that younger readers may not know how much of a fringe food it once was. The only person who knew about it was your granola-eating aunt, who maybe smelled a bit weird. These days she’s busy brewing her own CBD-infused kombucha. It certainly wasn’t something kids would want to eat.

However, load it with sugar, artificial flavoring, and put it in a fun delivery mechanism, and kids will love it! And parents will think it’s a healthy treat. Which is all to say that Go-Gurt was an innovative product when it was first introduced.

I haven’t seen a tube of yogurt in my lunch since grade school, so I don’t know what to expect from this. The white color doesn’t aid me in guessing the mystery flavor, which is frustrating because I’m going to need all the help I can get. I squeeze some out onto a spoon and am surprised to see that there’s enough modified corn starch and gelatin to keep its tubular shape. I take a taste and ponder the mystery.

Mint cotton candy?

Gosh, I’m bad at this. It’s not a typical fruity flavor, so I’m at a loss for a few moments, then it hits me: bubblegum! My pack-a-week gum habit saves me! It’s odd to have a flavor so specific to one product in another, but I’m fairly sure of my guess. I’m also sure that it doesn’t work as a yogurt. There’s not enough tang to balance out the taste, so it seems flat.

These days the market is crowded with a multitude of yogurt options, from Greek to Icelandic to Bulgarian, and even kids varieties tend to claim they’re organic, or with less sugar, or naturally flavored, or something. I’m a bit confused but also impressed that the full sugar Franken-yogurt of my childhood has lasted this long. But then again, what is yogurt but milk persevering?

I tried the Strawberry flavor as well, which tasted more like the yogurt I remember. Go-Gurt is a solid product, but the bubblegum(?) flavor doesn’t work as a yogurt flavor.

Purchased Price: $3.96
Size: 32 oz box (16 tubes)
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3 tubes) 150 calories, 1 gram of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 75 milligrams of sodium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 22 grams of sugar, 18 grams of added sugar, and 6 gram of protein.

Click here to read our previous mystery flavor product reviews.

REVIEW: Pop-Tarts Mister E Flavor

PopTartsMisterE 1 pkg

What is Pop-Tarts Mister E Flavor?

Pop-Tarts is rolling out its first-ever mystery flavor, and since it’s really into humanizing its products lately with hair, eyewear, and backstories, we have Mister E — a mustachioed investigator in shades who’s hellbent on cracking the case of who broke into the Pop-Tarts factory to create this new flavor. Vigilante P.I. tracking down off-hours criminal pastry enterprises. Mmmmkaaayyyy…

PopTartsMisterE 2 back

How is it?

The aroma in the package didn’t give much away, but the filling was white, so I started thinking coconut. But the second I bit into Mister E Pop-Tarts, the word BUTTER shot through my brain. They were sweet and savory in a really strange way – both tastes were competing for the spotlight. Maybe they were Terrible Buttercream Frosting flavor? I had to drag someone else into the mystery – their guess was swiss cheese. Now when I re-tasted, that seemed closer – a mild cheese flavor. But it still felt wrong – a wrong guess AND a wrong flavor to exist in the world.

PopTartsMisterE 3 fill

There’s a related contest website where you can get clues and enter your guess to win prizes. I’ve figured out the flavor based on the clues, and I will say it’s NOT any of the guesses above. But I’ll let you make the call…

Anything else you need to know?

These were very crumbly and started falling apart the moment I opened the foil wrapper. Once toasted, they broke into large and small pieces that promptly fell into the unreachable crevices of my toaster (ugh). I hope Mister E can solve the mystery of how to get melty, funky Pop-Tart crumbs out of small appliances.

PopTartsMisterE 4 toast

Conclusion:

Not the best Pop-Tart flavor I’ve ever tried – in fact, maybe the worst, but I loved trying them! This is exactly what mystery flavors should be – the questionable stuff we definitely wouldn’t buy if they called it what it is.

PopTartsMisterE 5 design

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product sample from Kellogg’s. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 27 oz./16-pastry box
Purchased at: Received from Kellogg’s
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 380 calories, 10 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 500 milligrams of sodium, 68 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 24 grams of total sugars, including 24 grams of added sugars, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Bag

I don’t believe I put forth a good showing in my Mystery Flavor Twizzlers review.

I tried to solve that flavor conundrum to no avail for days, and it left me a broken man.

I vowed to leave the snack detective game, never to return! I retired my houndstooth hat, my magnifying glass, and wait… Sour Patch Kids has a new mystery flavor?!

Just when I thought I was out, they pulled me back in!

Ok so, unlike the typical bright and vibrant Sour Patch Kids, these mystery pieces are all white. I tried my best not to let that somehow influence my guess.

As we all know, Sour Patch Kids are sour before they’re sweet. These took extra long to get to the latter. The typical sour sugar punch felt especially pronounced this time around.

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Bowl

Once the sour crystals melted away, I was left with a shockingly mild sweetness. I was instantly stumped and starting to regret my decision to return to the mystery game. I don’t really know how to describe the flavor other than “confectionary.” I know that’s a broad description, but it tasted more in line with a flavor you’d get in a pastry than the usual fruity Sour Patch fare.

My initial instinct was mild coconut, but then realized I broke my rule and let the color influence my guess, so I settled on… banana, which is also white. Maybe the color actually is a hint?

The flavor isn’t strong at all. It’s tasty, but it’s far and away the weakest Sour Patch flavor I’ve ever had. I think I might be right with banana, but if you wanted to tell me there might be something like vanilla, or marshmallow, or the aforementioned coconut, I’d believe it. Pina Colada? Maybe? Some kind of multi-ingredient dessert concoction? That seems more like a Jelly Belly thing than Sour Patch, no?

Unlike Twizzlers, these Sour Patch Kids came with clues on the bag. My bag had one, and I was able to snap a pic of a different hint as well.

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Clues

“It gives laughs and can be a riot, cause when it flies nobody’s silent.”

“Across the pond it has a different name, but there’s an extra ingredient in the game.”

Putting aside the fact these hints stink, I landed on Banana Cream Pie.

I would say the first hint means some clown is hilariously throwing a pie, and while this is happening, everyone else is making a ruckus and laughing up a storm.

The second hint makes a little more sense. In the UK, a banana cream pie is called “Dame Madeline’s Stupendous Yellow and White,” and as we all know, the extra ingredient is baked beans. It’s an acquired taste, but is it the flavor of these Mystery Kids?

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Alone

Ya know what? I’m stumped again. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this snack detective game. Don’t hire me to find your lost donut.

I’m saying it’s probably banana, maybe banana cream pie, and I’m also saying that despite being hard to decipher and pretty weak, they taste just fine. I’m gonna be super bummed if these are just another in the long line of “birthday cake” flavored snacks. Am I overlooking the Kids’ birthday?

Sour Patch Kids Mystery Flavor Mix

You can buy Mystery bags or regular Sour Patch Kid bags with some mystery flavored pieces mixed in, but be warned, the OG flavors will dwarf the mystery flavor.

You can submit your guess on their website, but if you somehow win with “Dame Madeline’s Stupendous Yellow and White,” you owe me a cut of that $50k prize. I want at least $3! I accept Venmo, Paypal, and whatever crypto is hot at that precise moment.

Best of luck with your guesses!

Purchased Price: $2.89
Size: 8 oz.
Purchased at: 7-11
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (12 pieces) 110 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 15 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of total carbohydrates, 23 grams of sugars, 0 grams of fiber, 0 grams of protein.