REVIEW: Nature’s Path Organic Cherry Chocolate Stripes Frosted Toaster Pastries

Nature's Path Organic Cherry Chocolate Stripes Frosted Toaster Pastries

Nature’s Path Organic Cherry Chocolate Stripes Frosted Toaster Pastries

Nature’s Path Organic Cherry Chocolate Stripes Frosted Toaster Pastries

Nature’s Path Organic Cherry Cherry Stripe Fristed Toaster Pastries

Nature’s Path Organ Cherry Chocolate Chripes Strosted Choaster Tastries

Nature’s Path Organ Sherry Chocholate Chripes Strosted Chocho Tas???

Oh! Hello there. I was just trying to say Nature’s Path Organic Cherry Chocolate Stripes Frosted Toaster Pastries five times in a row as fast as I can. As you can see, it’s quite the tongue twister and now my dreams of becoming an auctioneer have been crushed under the nine words that make up the name of this product.

Oh, I’ve let you down, Mr. John Moschitta Jr.!

The Nature’s Path Organic Cherry Chocolate Stripes Frosted Toaster Pastries, which I will call NPOCCSFTP for short, is the latest Pop-Tart lookalike from the organic foods manufacturer. The combination of tart cherries and sweet chocolate is a flavor that’s usually found in the candy clusterfuck known as a Whitman’s Sampler, whose multitude of choices has turned me over the years into an indecisive moron. I’m not too fond of the cherry/chocolate combo due to the number of times I’ve wrongfully picked the very tart cherry-filled Whitman’s chocolate, which my mother forced me to eat since I already touched it.

Because of my dislike for the cherry/chocolate combination, I didn’t have high expectations for the NPOCCSFTP, but Nature’s Path made the combination much more palatable than Whitman’s. The organic cherries didn’t overpower the organic chocolate, instead they blended well together because the cherries weren’t too sour. There’s also a little organic pomegranate juice, which I’m surprised didn’t enhance the sourness of the filling. Inside the pastry, the two fillings were supposed to be in alternating stripes, but because they’re both dark in color it’s like two bikini-clad girls in a filthy mud wrestling match where you can’t tell who’s who.

The crust had a grainy texture to it, just like the other Nature’s Path toaster pastry I tried. It’s also a little darker than the other one, so I’m wondering if there’s chocolate baked into it. It toasted up nicely, giving the pastry a nice crunchiness. The dirty white coloring of the frosting was a little off-putting since I demand my white toaster pastry frosting to be brighter than my smile.

Overall, the NPOCCSFTP was better than I thought it was going to be, but I can see people not enjoying it because of the cherry and chocolate combination. Nature’s Path Toaster Pastries are a good alternative, albeit a bit more expensive, for Kellogg’s Pop-Tarts. If you care about eating organic foods, then this would be an obvious choice. But if you don’t care about organic foods and you like toaster pastries with simple, short names like Kellogg’s Frosted Cherry Pop-Tarts, then the NPOCCSFTP is probably not the product for you.

(Nutritional Facts – 1 pastry – 200 calories, 4.5 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 125 milligrams of sodium, 38 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 19 grams of sugar, 3 grams of protein, 2% calcium and 6% iron.)

Item: Nature’s Path Organic Cherry Chocolate Stripes Frosted Toaster Pastries
Price: FREE
Size: 6 pastries
Purchased at: Given by PR Firm
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Decent cherry/chocolate flavor. Cherry wasn’t overpowering. USDA organic certified. Vegetarian. Uses fair traded ingredients. Mud wrestling.
Cons: Cherry/chocolate flavor might be a turnoff for some. Same nutritional values as a regular Pop-Tart. Only six in a box and pricier than Pop-Tarts. Could make out the stripes in the filling. Off white frosting was a little off-putting. Long name.

REVIEW: Nature’s Path Organic Frosted Strawberry Toaster Pastries

When I got the Nature’s Path Organic Frosted Strawberry Toaster Pastries, I thought it was going to be made out of organic hippietastic ingredients, like hemp, berries from some forest, pine cones stolen from a raccoon, tie-dye shirts, parts from a 1970s Volkswagon van, and Jerry Garcia’s beard trimmings. But then I realized that if it were truly hippietastic, it wouldn’t come packed in foil wrappers inside a cardboard box, it would be wrapped in leaves, sealed with homemade hemp rope, and delivered by some guy who says, “Hey, man” way too much.

Nature’s Path did a good job of making these organic toaster pastries look like the O.G. of toaster pastries — Pop-Tarts. As for its taste, if someone were to blindfold me, handcuff my hands behind the back of a chair, put a leather spiked leash around my neck, put a Frosted Strawberry Pop-Tart and a Nature’s Path Organic Frosted Strawberry Toaster Pastry in front me in their own doggie dishes, and then tell me I could try each one, only after I say, “May I please try it, Master,” I could definitely tell which one is which. The organic one is surprisingly very good and not as sweet as the original Pop-Tart version, which to me is a little too sweet.

The frosting had a nice crunch to it and the whole thing had a slight grainy texture, like there was with the Whole Grain Pop-Tarts I reviewed earlier, but I didn’t really mind that.

Eating these organic toaster pastries made me feel like I was eating healthy Pop-Tarts, and I wish I had some hippie friends I could share them with in a smoke-filled Volkswagon Bus, but I wondered if they were truly healthy. I compared the nutrition facts for these and the Frosted Strawberry Pop-Tarts and it turned out that they are about the same. Of course, the main difference between the two is the fact that the Nature’s Path one is organic, meaning that no synthetic pesticides, herbicides, and fertilizers were used in making its ingredients, which truly do give them a health advantage.

As with most organic products, there is a premium with them and these toaster pastries cost higher than their non-organic, big name counterpart. Each box also contains two less pastries than a regular Pop-Tarts box, which can be disappointing when I want to get my food glut on.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 pastry – 210 calories, 4 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 140 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 19 grams of sugar, 3 grams of protein, 2% calcium, 8% iron, and 0 grams of hippiness.)

Item: Nature’s Path Organic Frosted Strawberry Toaster Pastries
Price: $3.99
Purchased at: Some natural food store
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Surprisingly good. Organic. It’s frosted, bitches! Naturally flavored. Not overly sweet, like regular Pop-Tarts. Zero trans fat. Vegetarian. Not made out of hippietastic ingredients.
Cons: Slight grainy texture. Only six pastries, compared with Pop-Tarts, which have eight. Paying someone to call them “Master.”