REVIEW: Carl’s Jr. Charbroiled Steak Sandwich

Carl’s Jr. has been promoting their new Charbroiled Steak Sandwich by saying it’s a cheap way for guys to get a steak dinner on a date, but I don’t think it’s the best strategy.

The cheapest way for some dude to get a steak dinner on date night is by going to an expensive steak place (Tip #1: Morton’s or Ruth Chris), ordering the most expensive steak on the menu, and when the bill comes, patting the pocket he usually keeps his wallet in and then frantically patting all of the pockets on his body (Tip #2: Wear cargo pants on the date because there will more pockets to pat). The dude should then deeply sigh, grimace, apologize, say he forgot his wallet at home, and ask his date if she could pay. After she does, he should tell her that he’s worried about identity theft so he needs to go home to find his wallet and he’ll call her later. When he gets home, he should call his date, tell her that he found his wallet, and then say he never wants to see her again because she is ugly and needs better personal hygiene, like flossing better or not putting on perfume that makes her smell like old fart.

(Tip #3: Get a new phone number after doing this. Actually, get a new phone number, move to a new city, and grow/shave off facial hair, because hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.)

The attack on her self-consciousness will help her forget she just spent $100 on him and the only payment he’ll have to make is guilt, which goes away with a lot of alcohol.

(Tip #4: This freeloading has no gender bias. Women can also use these techniques on men.)

The Carl’s Jr. Charbroiled Steak Sandwich is probably the next cheapest way to get a steak dinner on a date. It’s significantly more compassionate than the best way, but it’s also significantly less tasty because it’s quite unexciting. The sandwich is made up of a 100% sirloin steak, topped with breaded onion rings, lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise in a toasted roll.

The steak that comes with it is an actual piece of steak and not any of that ground Angus stuff that Burger King tries to push as a steak in their Steakhouse burgers. The steak was a little tough and didn’t really taste like steak, instead I thought it tasted more like pork chops. Being that there’s an actual piece of steak and the onion rings hardly added any flavor to it, I was hoping Carl’s Jr. would’ve added a steak sauce to it, like A1 Steak Sauce, Heinz 57, or maybe Worcestershire sauce.

The Carl’s Jr. Charbroiled Steak Sandwich is hearty like an steak, but unfortunately its flavor doesn’t match. It maybe a cheap way to get a steak dinner on date night, but I wouldn’t try it because hell hath no fury like a woman who is expecting a real steak dinner.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 sandwich – 700 calories, 38 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 85 milligrams of cholesterol, 1080 milligrams of sodium, 58 grams of carbohydrates, 7 grams of sugar, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 32 grams of protein, and 0 grams of self-consciousness destruction.)

(Editor’s Note: See the Carl’s Jr. commercial for their Charbroiled Steak Sandwich below.)

Item: Carl’s Jr. Charbroiled Steak Sandwich
Price: $5.99 (sandwich only – $4.69 in the rest of the country)
Purchased at: Carl’s Jr.
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Hearty sandwich. Has an actual piece of steak. Lot of protein. Onion rings added a slight crunch. Getting a free steak dinner though deception.
Cons: Unexciting taste. Sirloin steak tasted like pork chops. Onion rings didn’t add much flavor. No steak sauce. High in sodium. The fury of scorn women. Guilt.

15 thoughts to “REVIEW: Carl’s Jr. Charbroiled Steak Sandwich”

  1. I think fast food should concentrate on what they do well (burgers, greasy breakfasts, fries, etc.) and leave steak to the chain restaurants. I can get a steak at Applebee’s if I’m scrimping. Granted it’s still twice as much as this “steak” sandwich, but it tastes a hell of a lot better.

  2. Also: I saw a hot sauce one time called “Scorned Woman.” It was supposed to pack quite a punch. I didn’t buy any though…I have bad enough luck with women as it is, why push my luck?

  3. Wow, Marvo, you’re like magic! Yesterday I was at Carl’s Jr. and saw this sandwich, but was suspicious of it because it just looked like a longer Western Bacon Cheeseburger… I told my friend who was with me that I was going to wait to see what you said about it. I was actually going to suggest that you review it, but I guess you are just on top of these things. LOL

    Glad to know the rating; I guess now I won’t get it.

  4. @Chuck – Alas, I cannot get a steak at Applebee’s because we do not have one here. Instead I’ll have to settle for either Ruby Tuesdays, D&B, or Chili’s.

    @Chuck – Maybe you would’ve had some good luck with the hot sauce and it might’ve been the greatest hot sauce EVER. Sometimes we have to take chances, because you never know when chance will smile brightly upon you.

    @Heidi – Western Bacon Cheeseburger is waaaayyyy better and it’s much better date food.

  5. The problem with real steak sandwich is that the real steak is alyays tough. I bet carls jr uses a thin slice choice bottom steak to cut cost. better to use a rib steak and charge 6.99
    people will pay if its good.

  6. The idea of mayonnaise and steak sounds absolutely disgusting. I agree that steak sauce would be a better plan.

    Side note 1: Gas stations in rural Georgia sometimes have diners next door and they sell breakfast sandwiches in the convenience store from the diner. I have had a few enjoyable steak (and pork chop) biscuits from them…because I eat sketchy things.

    Side note 2: It’s okay that you don’t have Applebees, they suck. Chili’s is much better. I’ve never gotten a steak at either though.

  7. Natalie – I’ve been to some Applebees that did suck, others that were good. I like Chilis also but I don’t think they’re exponentially better…maybe slightly better…but also more expensive. For a cheap steak Applebees is hard to beat.

  8. Just the look of the “steak” scares me. I used to like those rodeo burgers from Burger King, but this looks like it’s elementary school lunch sibling… scary indeed

  9. @Neil – I agree with you. I would pay more if it’s a better steak.

    @Natalie – I once ate at an Applebees when I went to Tahoe and I think it’s the same level of fare at Chili Tuesdays Friday’s.

    @Jeanette – It looks like a Whopper patty that didn’t split.

    @ie – I’m sure the grill marks are pre-grilled.

  10. @ultradave – No, it was just given some TLC by Carl’s Jr. employees. It’s actually one of the better looking sandwiches I’ve had in awhile, although the lettuce sticking out is kind of screwing it up.

  11. I don’t care what anyone says, I totally loved the steak sandwiches! I wish they would bring them back. I would buy one everyday! mmmmmmm..

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