Here’s the winner of our Hey! I Wouldn’t Mind $150 Sunglasses Drawing:
Congratulations, Brian!
Thank you to everyone who participated!
Be on the lookout for another prize drawing later this month. You can get a sneak peek at what we’re giving away on The Impulsive Buy’s Instagram page.
Q: What do you call it when a Danish-sounding company sells an Italian dessert in America?
A: Delicious! Or so we hope.
Fine, so I won’t get a job crafting jokes for Conan anytime soon. (At this point, even Leno is probably out of the question.) Still, you must admit there’s a certain sense of satisfaction to be felt when America, supposedly the great melting pot, so heartily embraces other cultures like this. Throw on some Spanish peanuts, serve with Colombian coffee and you’re in business!
Or are you?
As I had no idea about before researching this review (yes, I occasionally put in a little effort), Häagen-Dazs can trace its origins all the way back to… the Bronx. The founder was a Polish immigrant who decided his high-end ice cream might sell better with an exotic-sounding name, which history would prove remarkably accurate. So for everyone who assumed Häagen-Dazs originated in Denmark or Sweden, sorry… you’ll still have to head to Ikea for your genuine Scandinavian fix. Or just read the rest of this review, since the blood of a hundred raging Norsemen pounds through my veins (plus a couple of crafty Irishmen who snuck in there).
Since I was already researching stuff, I decided to go all the way and find out what distinguishes gelato from regular ice cream. Not a lot, as it turns out, since “gelato” is just the Italian word for ice cream. Generally speaking in the U.S., it’s a soft ice cream with less air and usually a little richer than regular ice cream.
But since there aren’t any official standards governing it, technically anyone can call their ice cream “gelato” with no consequences. Still, I’m going to ignore the skepticism bred into me by years of corporate work and choose to believe Häagen-Dazs actually did make this dessert a little richer than usual, instead of just calling it gelato to capture that exotic mystique. And they do capitalize on it, with the words “Italy” or “Italian” used on the carton about a dozen times and a little outline of the Colosseum.
Of course, when I hear the words “sea salt” I think not of Italy but of my home state of New Jersey. And being a big caramel fan as well, I was really looking forward to digging into this stuff. Color wise, it’s somewhere between beige and tan, strongly reminiscent of coffee ice cream. Once you dig a scoop in, you’ll locate the caramel swirl, though it should be noted that it’s not criss-crossing every square inch of the container, more popping up every now and again like jokes in recent seasons of The Simpsons. There also aren’t actual visible-to-the-naked-eye chunks of salt scattered throughout the mixture like little NaCl nuggets.
But speaking of salt, that leads me to maybe the biggest surprise about Häagen-Dazs Gelato Sea Salt Caramel, which is that the sea salt isn’t distributed evenly through the ice cream. If asked to predict ahead of time, I would have guessed that the salty taste would be pretty uniform with caramel becoming more and less prominent depending on how much of the swirl was in each bite. What I didn’t realize is that the sea salt is actually contained IN the caramel swirl. In essence, there’s sort of a “base” caramel foundation flavor, and then the saltiness waxes and wanes with the amount of swirl you get.
And boy, does it ever: some bites you might as well be eating plain caramel ice cream, with others you’ll be surfing a saline wave. At times it’s almost a delayed reaction, lingering after the caramel taste has faded, but it never becomes overwhelming, so you won’t feel like someone tossed a salt lick into your dessert. If anything I would have hoped for a little more salt… it’s good, so either expand the ribbon or mix a little bit into the base caramel.
Speaking of which, the overall caramel flavor is nicely rich and creamy, so I guess no lawsuits need to be filed over the “gelato” name, pending the results of the air content analysis I ordered. (Got my eye on you, Häagen-Dazs… or should I say, Hojnowski-Dziedzic?) The caramel swirl adds a nice textural element, and I was impressed by how easy it was to scoop even right out of the freezer — with lower air content and increased richness you might suspect it’d be harder to dig into, but actually quite the opposite. Or I’m just getting super-strong, another distinct possibility.
This is a good dessert, although the cost and calories have to be at least a little prohibitive. Still, it blends relatively well and is rich, as promised. (You’ll also need to hit the stairmaster for an extra 20 minutes the next day, as not promised but implied.) It isn’t the best ice cream I’ve ever had, but definitely a successful experiment, and one you shouldn’t hesitate to reach for if you’ve got a craving for some sweet n’ salty goodness.
(Nutrition Facts – 1/2 cup – 270 calories, 100 calories from fat, 11 grams of total fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 85 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 38 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 28 grams of sugars, and 4 grams of protein.)
Other Häagen-Dazs Sea Salt Caramel Gelato reviews:
The Ice Cream Informant
Item: Häagen-Dazs Sea Salt Caramel Gelato
Purchased Price: $4.49
Size: 14 fl. oz.
Purchased at: Giant
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Official ice cream of both the Vatican AND the Jersey Shore. Smooth and rich, just like you like your men. Caramel ice cream + caramel swirl = great combination! When it’s there, the salt adds a terrific element. Mostly-black carton makes you look super cool.
Cons: Misleading company names. Not enough salt to justify making up 2/3rds of the product name. Recent seasons of The Simpsons. Definitely needs a wider caramel swath. Legally I’m allowed to plop a Frosty in a cup and sell it as “gelato.”
If you live in Hawaii and happen to be near a television at 7:40am tomorrow (Tuesday, March 5th), I will be on Hawaii News Now Sunrise (the local NBC/CBS affiliate morning news show) talking about new products on grocery store shelves and looking as awkward as someone who has never been on television before would look. (Humblebrag.)
If you don’t live in Hawaii, but are near a computer at 7:40am Hawaii Standard Time (9:40am PST, 11:40am CST, 12:40pm EST) and want to see it, I believe the Hawaii News Now website livestreams their morning show. Though, I’m not 100 percent sure about that.
The segment is called Sunrise Test Kitchen and tomorrow’s one isn’t live, we shot it a few weeks ago. Actually, we taped one in January, but they wanted to change it a little bit, so we taped another version in February. Right now, we’re planning to do one of these segments every month.
I’m super excited about this opportunity and it finally allows my parents to brag about me…if they were the bragging type. They totally aren’t. But it gives them ammo if they wanted to.
This wouldn’t have happened if not for my friend Catherine, who helped me get a meeting with the morning show producers. So go read her awesome travel/food/life blog, The Cat Dish.
Here are some interesting new and limited edition products found on store shelves by us and your fellow readers.
A-tisket a-tasket. I put a box of Brown Rice Triscuit in my basket. Well, I though I did, but I actually dropped it. I dropped it. I dropped it. I actually dropped it. But I asked the manager for a discount and I got it. (Spotted by @KingRhino at Meijier.)
Don’t call it a comeback. Atkins been here for years. Rockin’ no beers and gettin’ rid of fat in your rear. (Spotted by Marvo at Safeway.)
Everything, eh? Then where’s the kitchen sink? (Spotted by Rebecca at Walmart.)
Fruyo…so it’s fruit with yogurt. OMG. I don’t think I’ve ever seen that before. (Spotted by Kelcey at Path Mark.)
Thank you to all the photo contributors! If you’re out shopping and see an interesting new or limited edition product on the shelf (or really unusual), snap a picture of it, and send us an email ([email protected]) with where you found it and “Spotted” in the subject line. If you do so, you might see your picture in our next Spotted on Shelves post.
I consider myself very lucky to have no food allergies. I’m allergic to dust, pollen, weeds, grass, animals, and I suspect just “going outside”, but I have no aversion to lactose, gluten, or anything else food-related.
This is fortunate for me, since I have very little self-control. If I ever became lactose intolerant, I would probably spend the rest of my life sharting myself, because I love dairy products and you’ll have to pry a slice of pizza with extra cheese out of my cold, dead hands. I’m assuming I died from diarrhea-related dehydration.
Many others are not as lucky as I, however. Fortunately, for those with an intolerance to cow milk, there’s soy milk!
I’ve known a few moo milk-drinkers who have tried soy milk and been all, “Ew, gross, this tastes and feels nothing like real milk.” Well, no, because it’s not cow milk. Please try not to faint from shock when something tastes different than something else because it’s made from completely different ingredients. God forbid you eat a tofu burger; you’d probably have a heart attack. Or not, because you’re much more likely to have a heart attack eating red meat.
I say all this like I’m the greatest lactose intolerant/vegan sympathizer out there. In reality, I’m a total asshole and constantly make fun of my hippy friends who are vegetarians, and deal out juvenile fart jokes to anyone I know who can’t eat dairy.
That said, I’ve quietly cheated on cow milk with soy milk quite a few times in my past. It had nothing to do with health – in fact, I generally have a natural aversion to anything that’s good for me – I just like the way it tastes, specifically the vanilla and almond varieties.
When I saw that Silk had come out with “iced latté coffeehouse drinks”, I immediately thought of Starbucks bottled Frappuccinos, and wondered how the two would compare. Before you get your panties in a bunch over the fact that lattés and cappuccinos are different, consider that these are pre-made store products, not drinks created by your favorite barista.
Silk’s Iced Lattés come in two flavors – vanilla and mocha. I chose vanilla simply because I prefer it over chocolate. Don’t get me started on people who think vanilla isn’t a legit flavor – I just spent two paragraphs defending soy milk, which goes against every opportunity-for-mockery bone in my body. Those are most of my bones, by the way.
Silk’s website sez: “Be your own barista with smooth, refreshing Silk Vanilla Iced Latte. A wholesome blend of Silk soymilk and espresso from premium Arabica coffee beans, our Iced Latte is deliciously dairy-free, with no artificial sweeteners, colors or flavors and no high-fructose corn syrup. Coffeehouse-quality taste, conveniently located in your home fridge.”
Right off the bat, I like that they don’t use HFCS, because I’m a total snob about that. On a sarcastic note, I also like that they’re too lazy to use the é in “latte”, despite it being obviously present on the carton. Hey Silk, it’s not that hard to learn alt codes. Or copy and paste the symbol off of Wikipedia, which is what I’m doing for this éntiré réviéw. See how easy that is?
Now then, to the drink itself.
Silk Vanilla Iced Latté Coffeehouse Drink is a little thicker than normal Silk soy milk, but not quite as thick as a Frappuccino, or a latté you’d get at an actual coffee house. This is to be expected, since soy milk is generally more watery than moo milk. I don’t usually mind this, but when you start getting into fancypants coffee territory, viscosity is important, and Silk juuuuuust missed the mark on creaminess.
What it may lack in texture, Silk iced latte makes up for in flavor. I could immediately taste the vanilla, and it wasn’t just “soy milk vanilla”, it was “shot of vanilla syrup” vanilla, which is important in a coffee drink. It also had just the right amount of sweetness, which is something I can’t even say for some other coffee drinks – I’ve had some vanilla lattés that were so sweet they made my stomach hurt afterwards.
As for the coffee itself, I found its flavor to be a little lacking. Not in quality, but in quantity. There was a nice coffee finish, but it was too muted. I like my share of fru-fru coffee drinks, but I also want it to actually taste like coffee. In a perfect drink, I like my vanilla and coffee flavors to be about 50/50. I felt like in this drink, it was more 70/30.
Silk Vanilla Iced Latté Coffeehouse Drink isn’t perfect – the consistency is a little too thin, and the coffee flavor too muted – but if you’ve been looking for a lactose-free, gluten-free alternative to Starbucks bottled vanilla Frappuccino, this drink isn’t too shabby. The non-HFCS sweetness and vanilla flavors are pleasant, and it does actually have some caffeine in it. Although the carton does not specify how much, the Silk website says it has 64 milligrams of caffeine per serving. All in all, it’s a decent off-the-shelf coffee soy drink.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 cup – 100 calories, 0.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 20 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)
Other Silk Iced Latté reviews:
The Good Karma Kitchen
Item: Silk Vanilla Iced Latté Coffeehouse Drink
Purchased Price: $3.49 (on sale; regularly $4.59)
Size: Half gallon
Purchased at: Albertson’s
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Nice vanilla flavor. Juvenile fart jokes. Just the right amount of sweetness. Caffeine. No high-fructose corn syrup.
Cons: Coffee flavor was too muted. Sharting. Could have been creamier. Silk’s copy writers being too lazy to put an accent mark over the “e” in “latté”.