REVIEW: Girl Scout Adventurefuls Cookies

Girl Scouts Adventurefuls Box

What are Girl Scout Adventurefuls Cookies?

The Girl Scouts are back, hocking a new salted caramel brownie cookie for all to enjoy.

How are they?

Girl Scouts Adventurefuls Top

Make no mistake, these are good. I’d say they’re the best new Girl Scout Cookie flavor in at least a decade, but man, did they bungle the texture.

You’ve got a brownie-based cookie, and it’s as hard as a cookie could be. Now, some may like that. This is a COOKIE, after all, not a brownie… but I really question why they decided to go this route.

Girl Scouts Adventurefuls Bite

You know that corner brownie piece that’s harder than the rest of the squares but still has a firm chewiness to it? If these cookies were that texture, they’d be rivals to the Girl Scout cookie throne.

The cookie itself tastes like a brownie, but with such a hard, crunchy texture, it takes away from the enjoyment of the flavor. They were so close, yet so far away.

Anything else you need to know?

I would have probably forgiven the cookie more if the salted caramel flavored “crème” was actual crème, not hard synthetic plastic. Yeah, even the crème is texturally off. It’s not an icing, but more like a thin layer of Hershey’s chocolate, and the caramel flavor doesn’t really pop at all. It gets swallowed by the dense brownie chocolate flavor almost instantly.

This cookie isn’t “full” of “adventure” at all, unless they’re talking about the salt, which I will say does come through and is a great choice on their part.

Conclusion:

Girl Scouts Adventurefuls Tray

Far be it from me to tell those adorable little scouts how to make their cookies, but if these were brownie edge textured cookies, with a “crème” center similar to, let’s say, a Stella D’oro Swiss Fudge? I’m re-ordering five boxes.

As they are, they’re still good – Top 5 even. I’d rank ’em just behind Samoas, Thin Mints, and Tagalongs, but they could’ve been a 9 out of 10. If any Women Scouts of America in charge of cookie decisions are reading this, please consider softening these up next year. I alone will probably put you over your sales quota.

Purchased Price: $5.00
Size: 6.3 oz box
Purchased at: Girl Scouts of America
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 Cookies) 120 calories, 6 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 80 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of total carbohydrates, 9 grams of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Rockstar Unplugged Energy Drink

Rockstar Unplugged Cans

Rockstar Unplugged?

Folks, the only Rockstar Unplugged I care about is Kurt Cobain circa 1993.

Oh, Me. That was Dumb. All Apologies.

And let’s just throw one more track from Nirvana’s classic MTV Unplugged setlist right here – Come as You Are… to this review of Rockstar’s new hemp seed-infused energy drinks!

Heh? No? Alright, alright, I’ll just review the drinks now.

Rockstar Unplugged is a new line of beverages that combine hemp seed oil, B vitamins, spearmint, and lemon balm for a “fruit-forward energy boost that helps maintain an easy-going, free-flowing and soul-fueling attitude for any mood or occasion.” Whew.

That contradicts what I expect from an energy drink, but whatever Bruh, I dig the vibe.

I tracked down two of the three flavors – Blueberry and Passion Fruit. Rockstar also released a Raspberry Cucumber variety, but no one told any store within a 20-mile radius of me.

Rockstar Unplugged Passion Fruit 1

Passion Fruit is a fruit I’ve never eaten, but a flavor I enjoy from various other drinks and candy.

For something called “Unplugged,” the yellow color is ELECTRIC. Unfortunately, the carbonation was weak, so the drink itself never lived up to the color’s vibrancy. It didn’t have that POP I was hoping for.

Taste-wise, it was just generic “tropical fruit,” and a bit too sweet. The flavor reminded me of those little hard guava candies you get after sushi dinners, if you know what I mean.

Rockstar Unplugged Blueberry 2

Blueberry looked and smelled incredible. I thought I was about to drink some Great Blue-dini Kool-Aid, which made me ponder – is blueberry a unique energy drink flavor? Normally when I see a blue energy drink, I expect some uber-masculine name like “Razzmatazz Haymaker” or “Electric Bluedriver,” but here we just get little old blueberry, and it succeeds.

It wasn’t too sweet, leaning more towards a slightly underripe blueberry flavor, but in no way bitter or sour. Not sure why, but the carbonation was also stronger. It “popped,” with a sharp taste that finished with a mellow, satisfying sweetness.

With that said, they both left a light coating in my mouth that I guess I’ll chalk up to the “herbal blend” and hemp seed oil? It wasn’t gross by any means, but was mildly off-putting.

Rockstar Unplugged Both 2

In the end, they’re mid-tier energy drinks, but I’m glad Rockstar tried something new because I feel like they’re getting swallowed up by Red Bull, Monster, and Bang – which seems to have conquered about 75% of every convenience store I go to these days. (When did Bang explode on the scene?)

I drank both in the afternoon and never felt jittery at all. They kept me pretty alert for the rest of the day, so if that’s what adding hemp does to an energy drink, Rockstar Unplugged might be onto something big here. It was borderline Nirvana.

That’s what we call a “really bad callback.”

Overall, I like this concept, but I don’t think Red Bull is in any danger of losing my business. I’ll probably get the blueberry Unplugged a few times this summer, and I hope to find Raspberry Cucumber someday.

Purchased Price: $1.69 each
Size: 12 fl oz cans
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Blueberry), 5 out of 10 (Passion Fruit)
Nutrition Facts: (1 can) 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 50 milligrams of sodium, 0 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugars, 0 grams of protein, 1.53 milligrams of Vitamin B, and 80 milligrams of caffeine.

REVIEW: Dunkin’ Pink Strawberry Coconut Refresher

Dunkin Pink Strawberry Coconut Refresher Hold

Strawberry and coconut are two of the most delicious fruits on Earth, yet I don’t think I’ve ever had them mixed together.

How’s that possible?

At this point in my life, I feel like I’ve tried almost every fruit duo you can throw at me, yet here I sit, wracking my brain, and I can’t think of a single snack, candy, juice, cocktail, pastry, ice cream, whatever, that prominently features a combination of strawberry and coconut.

I didn’t even have that realization until I saw this Pink Strawberry Coconut Refresher in the Dunkin’ app. Then it hit me like a brick. Why haven’t I had this before?

I’ve actually been pretty mixed (no pun) on Dunkin’s line of “Refresher” drinks as a whole, but I had a good feeling about this one. It’s strawberry. It’s coconut. This one had to work, right?

Oh, it worked. I think this might be my favorite non-coffee drink Dunkin’ has ever released.

As it turns out, “pink strawberry,” is actually a concoction of strawberry and dragonfruit. While it’s most definitely an overpowering strawberry flavor, the dragonfruit adds a tart kick that levels off the sweetness you’d probably get from straight strawberry concentrate. Toss in the mellow creaminess of the coconut milk, and you’ve got a perfectly blended drink.

Dunkin Pink Strawberry Coconut Refresher Top

I genuinely don’t like to use the word “mouthfeel” (*shudder*) … but they really nailed the mouthfeel.

There’s no indication that the coconut milk is flavored, but I could be convinced there was a tinge of vanilla sweetener. If you’ve ever had Italian Ices mixed with vanilla custard – not sure what they call that around your way – it reminded me of one of those. I used to get Watermelon and Vanilla as a kid, and I was whisked back to those days*.

Dunkin Pink Strawberry Coconut Refresher Half

I also love when these drinks have that oil and water style separation. The way the coconut milk sat atop the vibrant pink juice and slowly cascaded down made me feel like I was drinking some kind of crazy theme park creation.

I gotta say, this lived up to its “Refresher” name. It gave me an energizing pep in my step, but if I had to dock it slightly, I would say this is more of a midday “pick me up” type drink. I don’t know if I’d ever order this in the morning over my standard coffee, as I tend to try and stay away from too much sugar to start my day.

I really enjoyed the flavors and the boost this Refresher gave me. This is definitely the proper use for coconut milk. I tried one of Dunkin’s coconut milk lattes and didn’t even wanna finish it. In this format, I wish I got a larger size. I’ll one hundred percent be a repeat customer.

So, I guess I’ve had strawberries mixed with coconut now. If anyone can tip me off to any other product that combines those two flavors, I’d appreciate it.

*Oh, and if anyone from Dunkin’ sees this – Watermelon Coconut Refresher. Let’s do it.

Purchased Price: $3.69
Size: Medium
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 170 calories, 4.5 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 65 milligrams of sodium, 31 grams of total carbohydrates, 28 grams of sugars, 0 grams of fiber, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Dunkin’ Bacon & Cheddar Omelet Bites

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Tray

I’ve eaten many an egg bagel in my day, but eggs shaped like little bagels?! What is this madness?

Yeah, I’m not gonna lie, Dunkin’ got me to try its new Bacon Cheddar Omelet Bites mostly because of the shape. Seeing egg bites with a donut hole somehow filled the massive hole in my ever-aging heart.

It takes a lot to get a dedicated Bread Head™ like myself to order eggs without some kind of carb surrounding it, but I had to find out if these were as good as they looked.

As it turns out, I’m a fan. Sure, the expectation of the menu picture didn’t quite match the reality of what I got, but I still found the presentation to be pretty fun.

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Both

The bites come in a serving tray with a fork, but have enough structural integrity to hold in your hand if you wanna be a weirdo and eat them like the holed out treats that preceded them.

The egg is cooked sous vide, and it made me realize that I’ve never had eggs that way. I’m not sure I’ve ever had anything sous vide, and I honestly don’t even know if I’m using it right in a sentence – I uh, I don’t know how to write sous vide. … Sue me. I’m what the French call, “les incompetents.” I’ll just be an uncultured dummy and use the English translation, “under vacuum.”

Guess what? “Under vacuum” eggs taste pretty damn good.

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Fork

They had a slightly mushy almost potato-like texture that might not be for everyone, but I genuinely enjoyed it. It was as if they took the filling of Pillsbury Breakfast Scrambles (the savory Toaster Strudels) and rolled it into a patty. The flavor was very similar to me, but it was also right in line with what you know and love from Dunkin’ or most other fast food breakfast menus.

The cheddar and bacon definitely pop. The cheese is blended perfectly into the egg, so there’s no ooze to worry about. I’d say the bacon leans towards that artificial “bacon bits” taste, but it’s fine. Those are good too.

Dunkin Bacon  Cheddar Omelet Bites Single

I’m glad they used this gimmicky shape, because I’m not sure I would have gravitated towards them without it. I’ve seen omelet bites at other places like Starbucks, but never gave them a second thought.

So yeah, these are fun and satisfying. They’re a really good source of protein also, which I appreciate.

Dunkin’ is also selling an egg white and veggie variety. I might try them at some point, but I’m definitely going back for the Bacon Cheddar bites. Even though they stand on their own, I’d like to see if I can try to slide these between two little biscuits. It might end up being an overwhelming starch bomb, but I know it’d be delicious. Hopefully they release more of these with some crumbled sausage next time.

After the speed bump that was the Mini Pancakes, it’s good to see Dunkin’ innovating the “mini” food game once again. You’ll never go wrong with a Munchkin, a mini bagel ball, or a couple of these new Omelet Bites.

Purchased Price: $4.14
Size: 2 Bites
Purchased at: Dunkin
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 280 calories, 19 grams of fat, 10 grams of saturated fat, 0.5 grams of trans fat, 185 milligrams of cholesterol, 520 milligrams of sodium, 7 grams of total carbohydrates, 2 grams of total sugars, and 17 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Kellogg’s Eggo Frosted Maple Flavor Pop-Tarts

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Box

Oreo seems to get all the hype, but I’m not sure any snack brand has had more flavor variations over the years than Pop-Tarts.

Sure, I could probably look that up and get you exact figures, but I’m too lazy. After all, I DID eat a Pop-Tart for breakfast today.

To be fair, Pop-Tarts may be a “lazy” breakfast, but they are the KINGS of lazy on-the-go breakfasts, and that’s exactly why I’ve always appreciated them.

Don’t feel like putting forth even the slightest bit of cooking effort? Grab an ol’ reliable Pop-Tart. You’ll still feel like you actually ate breakfast, especially now that they’ve teamed up with another breakfast staple, Eggo.

A handheld pastry that tastes like Eggo waffles? Sounds like a hall of fame “lazy” breakfast to me.

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Frosting

Well, it sounded like one at least…

I wouldn’t necessarily say these BURST with flavor. They do a decent job toeing the line between the two familiar experiences each brand brings to the table, but I’m a little baffled.

I wanted to be waffled.

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Split

You get some maple syrup, but it’s cut with that very distinct Pop-Tart crust taste and texture. Imagine pouring Pop-Tart crust batter into a waffle iron. It tastes wayyyyy more like Pop-Tart than waffle, to the point “Eggo” just feels there in name only. “Eggo” must only be repping the maple flavor because these only kinda taste like Hint o’ Waffles.

There’s a dab of “butteriness” in there too, which I liked. I thought maybe the yellow icing was butter flavored, but upon isolating it, it just had a generic sugary flavor. I guess that butter also came from the crust, and maybe that’s ultimately where the “waffle” plays in.

Pop-Tart pastry is just the dominant flavor, even more so than the maple filling and icing, which makes these kinda bland overall. They smell like maple, though, which is always a welcome aroma.

Eggo Frosted Maple Pop Tarts Toasted

I’m not a huge toasted Pop-Tart guy, I usually just go pouch to mouth, but this seemed as good a flavor as any to eat warm. The toaster didn’t really improve the experience, but hey, at least I managed to burn my palm on the scolding hot icing!

So yeah, whether you lazily eat your Pop-Tarts right out of the pouch or toast them, these just come away tasting like mildly sweet Maple Pop-Tarts. They’re not terrible. They’re mid-tier, and I like them better than the Maple Bacon flavor from a few years ago. That being said, they’re still disappointing since they almost accomplished what they set out to do.

I bought 16 of these things, so they’ll stick around for a bit, but I don’t necessarily mind knowing I’ll have ’em there for some future lazy mornings. I may even get adventurous and use them as bread in an egg and sausage sandwich at some point… if I have the energy. Meh, maybe I won’t. Who knows? I’m going to take a nap.

Purchased Price: $4.14
Size: 16-pack box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 380 calories, 12 grams of fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 330 milligrams of sodium, 67 grams of total carbohydrates, 30 grams of total sugars, 0 grams of fiber, and 4 grams of protein.