Triscuit has a new line of crackers with seeds in them. Yes, IN them and not as a topping for fancy Triscuit recipes that has ingredients that aren’t readily available in most home kitchens.

How are they made? Simply. That’s what the side of the box says — Made Simply. The process, which is also on the side of the box goes like this: cook the wheat, shred and weave the wheat together with seeds, and bake to golden perfection. Okay, I still don’t understand how it’s done, but it probably involves patents and something proprietary.

The woven with seeds line debuted with three varieties: Woven with Poppy Seeds Garlic & Onion, Woven with Quinoa Seeds Basil & Garlic, and Woven with Chia Seeds Rosemary & Jalapeño.

Triscuit Woven with Poppy Seeds Garlic & Onion

I’ve eaten enough garlic and onion in my life to know what they taste like and how far away others should stay away from me after I’ve eaten either of the two pungent ingredients. So I’m confident when I say these crackers taste cheesy.

Maybe combining the two creates something like a primary colors scenario where the primary flavors of garlic and onion create a secondary flavor — cheesy. Okay, at times, the garlic comes out, but these taste cheesy to me, which is fine because they’re still tasty.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 8 oz. box
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (6 crackers) 120 calories, 4.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 105 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

Triscuit Woven with Quinoa Seeds Basil & Garlic

One sniff of these and I knew the basil would be strong. My nose let my taste buds know, and after eating one, my taste buds confirmed it to my nose, who did a few nostril pumps to celebrate.

The garlic lingers in the background. Sometimes I can taste it, but most times I can’t. The basil is the dominant flavor, probably because of its strong aroma. The cracker is as tasty as the others, but this is the only one that makes me want to dip it in olive oil and cracked pepper at a Macaroni Grill.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 8 oz. box
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (6 crackers) 120 calories, 4 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

Triscuit Woven with Chia Seeds Rosemary & Jalapeno

If you’re hoping for a spicy Triscuit, these are not the crackers you’re looking for. If you want that, I’m sure Triscuit has a recipe it can recommend you. There’s a heat tickle that builds up after eating a few, but it’s not something that has me reaching for a room temperature glass of water.

Rosemary and jalapeño seem like an odd combination to me, but the two work together, and they’re the only duo of this bunch that I could taste both ingredients. The rosemary is the most noticeable, causing the crackers’ aroma to remind me of a roasted chicken. But jalapeño lets your taste buds know it’s there with its heat tickles and pepperiness. There’s also a slight sweetness that helps cut through the two main tastes.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 8 oz. box
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (6 crackers) 120 calories, 4.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

All three are tasty savory crackers, but I’m not sure the woven seeds do anything other than make these more appealing to birds and cause all three to look very similar. How similar? Let me just say the photos of the actual crackers aren’t embedded in the appropriate sections of the review. Or am I lying about that? You can’t tell because they look so damn alike.

I thought they’d add a different crunchy texture, but Triscuit have always been super crunchy, so I imagine its hard for the seeds to stand out. The only times I notice the crunch of the seeds is when they get unwoven from the wheat, hang out between my teeth, eventually come loose long after I’ve swallowed the wheat, and end up as a post-snack snack. I also thought they might provide some nuttiness, but the seasoning used on each cracker is potent enough to mask whatever flavor they have.

*I totally switched photos. The first one is the Rosemary & Jalapeño, the second one is Garlic & Onion, and the last one is Basil & Garlic.