I have long imagined Valentine’s Day as the pink, wintry sequel to Halloween.

Both are holidays primarily geared at giving candy to children. Both are “major” holidays where you still have to go to work. Both are gatekeepers of larger eerie/thankful/merry and loving/lucky/springlike holiday seasons.

Four months ago, I was unimpressed with Cookies & Screeem M&M’s, which were a white chocolate center inside a dark chocolate layer.

Now, just in time for Valentine’s Day, Mars has stuffed not two but three kinds of chocolate inside a candy shell. Triple Chocolate M&M’s have a milk chocolate center, a white chocolate layer, and a dark chocolate layer, all inside the iconic shell. I guess this is their idea of cramming an entire heart-shaped box of chocolates into one small morsel.

The first thing I noticed about the packaging was the corniness of the picture. Ladies, if a man proposes to you with a ring with half a pink M&M on it, turn him down. You can do better. For one thing, that ring will turn your finger green…after it turns it pink and brown.

Fortunately, these red, pink, and purple candies are better than their spooky predecessor. First of all, they don’t have the chemical flavor of the black food coloring. Additionally, Mars made the right move by putting their flagship milk chocolate —- the flavor they used to call “Plain” -— in the center. Milk chocolate is the star of the show.

Don’t give a standing ovation to the white and dark supporting cast, however. I can taste their presence only minimally. If I let an M&M dissolve in my mouth, I can detect the different layers’ textures, but only because I know they’re there. Overall, the M&M is a conglomeration of generic sweetness. If someone snuck in an occasional oversized “Plain” milk chocolate M&M, I probably would never notice.

They’re a tasty candy, and I don’t think anyone will ever turn them down. It’s cool they got all three kinds of chocolate inside, but the flavor isn’t as noticeable or innovative as you would hope.

I would prefer it if the Walmart-exclusive Strawberry Milk Chocolate variety from 2016 was brought back as the St. Valentine’s Day variety, but Triple Chocolate is better than the Walmart-exclusive White Cheesecake. I would be glad if they brought these back next year, but wouldn’t miss them if they didn’t.

(Nutrition Facts – 1.5 oz. – 200 calories, 90 fat calories, 9 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 25 milligrams of sodium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 26 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 9.9 oz. bag
Purchased at: Lee’s MarketPlace
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Cool that they got three kinds of chocolate in one. Milk chocolate takes center stage. A yummy candy. Better than Cookies & Screeem.
Cons: It’s hard to detect the dark and white chocolates. Less flavorful, and less Valentine’s-y, than the strawberry flavor of 2016. Ridiculous packaging.

Both Birthday Cake and Cookies ‘n’ Creme Rice Krispies Treats look good.

Sure, the colorful sprinkles on top of the birthday cake version appears as if it was subjected to unicorn spittle as the magical beast recited “Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers” several times. And, sure, the cookies ‘n’ creme one appears to have been under a leaky laser printer toner cartridge. But, if you don’t have an imagination like mine, they look tasty.

With that said, if you’re expecting them to taste like birthday cake and cookies ’n’ creme, I’m going to snap, crackle, and pop your dreams because they don’t.

The underside of the Birthday Cake Rice Krispies Treat is dipped in a white confection and topped with a sugary drizzle and colorful sprinkles that add a crunchy texture to the party. Having consumed a number of artificially flavored birthday cake snacks that equal the years I’ve been alive, this doesn’t have that familiar flavor. It doesn’t taste like yellow cake with frosting. It doesn’t taste like chocolate cake with frosting. It’s basically a sweeter Rice Krispies Treat with sprinkles.

Cookies ’n’ Creme also has a white confection bottom and a sugary drizzle, but comes topped with something that looks similar to chocolate cookie bits. I’m not sure they’re actual cookie crumbs because they seem to have a texture that’s more like sprinkles than cookies. The rectangle treat has a whisper of cocoa flavor, but it doesn’t scream cookies ’n’ cream like its appearance does. It tastes like a normal Rice Krispies Treat with several rogue Cocoa Krispies.

Last year, we saw Kellogg’s Rice Krispies Treats jump on the pumpkin pie bandwagon. While it didn’t have a strong flavor, it didn’t taste like a regular Rice Krispies Treat either. I was hoping for, at least, the same result with these, but it didn’t happen. That’s disappointing.

Even though there’s nothing on the boxes to indicate this, these are for the Valentine’s season. But the wrapper around each crispy marshmallow bar has a heart shaped white space with the words “So much to love about—“ printed on it.

Thanks for doing that, Kellogg’s! It allows me to use the wrapper to show how I feel about Birthday Cake and Cookie ’n’ Creme Rice Krispies Treats.

Disclosure: I received free samples of these from Kellogg’s, but that didn’t influence my review in any way.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 bar – Birthday Cake – 90 calories, 3 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 9 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein. Cookies ‘n’ Creme – 100 calories, 3 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 90 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, 8 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 10.9 oz. box/14 bars
Purchased at: Received from Kellogg’s
Rating: 5 out of 10 (Birthday Cake)
Rating: 5 out of 10 (Cookies ‘n’ Creme)
Pros: They look tasty. Can give out on Valentine’s Day.
Cons: Doesn’t taste like birthday cake or cookies ‘n’ creme. Both taste too much like original Rice Krispies Treats.