REVIEW: Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge

What is the Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge?

There’s no official connection between Bertie Botts Every Flavor Bean and Jelly Belly’s Bean Boozled line of jelly beans. Yet, I imagine we have Mr. Bott to thank for not knowing if the next candy confection we eat is chocolate pudding or canned dog food flavored.

Similarly, I like to imagine we have a pyromancer to thank for the Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge, which features five chili flavorings of escalating spiciness.

How is it?

I was impressed to notice the ingredient statement included actual chili puree from each of the chili varieties. Perhaps the R&D process for these involved less magical fire manipulation and more Magic Bullet Blender manipulation. Either way, I’m encouraged to think these beans might offer the kind of authentic chili flavor a heat seeker like me wants.

Sriracha

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge Sriracha

I pop a single bean into my mouth, and there’s a quick spicy bite at the back of my throat, just like actual sriracha sauce. The heat is immediate, but its rapidly quenched by sweetness. These would never be included in a normal mix of jelly beans, but if they were, I’d think the amount of spice was surprisingly bold. As a spicy novelty, they’re fairly tame.

Jalapeno

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge Jalapeno

There are some grassy, vegetal flavors from the puree that set these apart from the sriracha. The spice level is similar, but is better balanced by the jalapeno flavor and so seems milder.

Cayenne

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge Cayenne

These have a slower buildup of heat, with a deeper burn that fills the mouth. I must admit that I was a bit nervous going into the Fiery Five Challenge, but this middle entry has a very manageable amount of heat. Bring it on, Jelly Belly.

Habanero

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge Habanero

Now we’re getting somewhere. The heat is still very tolerable, but I had to do that thing when you suck in air through your mouth to cool the tongue. The fruity sweetness balances the spice to provide a pleasant experience.

Carolina Reaper

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge Carolina Reaper

I was getting a bit cocky up until the habanero, but that one was spicy enough so that I’m apprehensive going into this one. I pop it into my mouth and immediately taste Tabasco. It’s spicy enough that I actually get up from my seat and start searching the kitchen for something to cool my mouth. By the time I arrive, the heat had diminished enough so that ice water sufficed. The Carolina Reapers are certainly very spicy, but I declare victory over the Fiery Five Challenge.

All at One Time

Do you think more people eat jelly beans individually or willy nilly by the handful? I’m more of a one-by-one, guy myself, with some artful flavor mixing after I’ve sampled them all.

In the spirit of challenge, I take a handful and glance at them to make sure there’s a generally representative mix (and maybe not too many Caroline Reapers) and shovel them into my mouth.

Uh oh.

You know that scene at the end of Terminator 2, where the T-1000 falls into the vat molten metal, loses control of its mimicry, and then randomly morphs through all the forms it’s taken throughout the film? That’s what this is like. The heat of 15+ beans is much greater than when daintily sampling them one by one, with each bean’s distinct flavors randomly rising and falling.

Ice water won’t be enough, and I don’t have ice cream, the gold standard chile cure. Full-fat Greek yogurt does enough so that I’m not flailing around like a robot assassin from the future in a foundry, but only time completely cools my mouth.

Jelly Belly Bean Boozled Fiery Five Challenge Game

Anything else you need to know?

I work in food manufacturing and have participated in hundreds of sensory panels during my career. Let me tell you that the surest way to remove all joy from a food you love is to eat small bites of it every day for years.

This can actually be helpful because the question you’re supposed to be answering when sampling a sensory sample isn’t “Is this good?” or “Do I like this?” but, “Does this taste like it’s supposed to?”

I bring this up because I enjoy imagining the sensory testers in the Bertie Botts and Bean Boozled factory tasting vomit flavored beans and asking, “Do these taste enough like vomit? Or should they be more vomity?”

Conclusion:

The fact that Jelly Belly was able to get real chile flavor into these is impressive. Despite that, this isn’t the kind of product you eat because they taste good. They’re a fun challenge, and you knew if you were up for it even before you read this review. Go with that when deciding to purchase or not.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free sample of the product. Doing so did not influence my review in any way.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 3.5 Oz (99 grams)
Purchased at: Received from Jelly Belly
Rating: 7 out of 10

Nutrition Facts

110 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 20 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Nestle Drumstick Blizzard

Dairy Queen Nestle Drumstick Blizzard

What is the Nestle Drumstick Blizzard?

It’s the ultimate timesaver! Have you ever wanted to enjoy a Nestle Drumstick and a Dairy Queen Blizzard but simply could not find the time for both in your busy schedule? Your problem is solved with the Nestle Drumstick Blizzard. Crowned as the Blizzard of the Month for July, it contains chocolate-covered Drumstick pieces, peanuts, and, of course, vanilla soft serve.

How is it?

Dairy Queen Nestle Drumstick Blizzard Top

We all know that the best part of a Drumstick is the butt piece. Sure, that doesn’t sound very appetizing, but you know what I’m talking about — that last bite at the bottom of the cone filled with solid chocolate. For me, that’s really the only reason to eat one because the ice cream part is not great, and it’s not even ice cream but rather “vanilla frozen dairy dessert.”

Dairy Queen Nestle Drumstick Blizzard Nugget 1

The “Drumstick pieces” are chocolate-coated sugar cone, just like the butt chunk! I did manage to rescue a couple of them intact from my Blizzard for your viewing pleasure.

Dairy Queen Nestle Drumstick Blizzard Nugget 2

Technically they are Drumstick pieces, but DQ isn’t smashing up full cones here. Instead, it is using small square pieces. I’m sorry to say that the rescue of the two pictured above was short-lived, and I’m not sorry to say they were quite delicious on their own.

Dairy Queen Nestle Drumstick Blizzard Spoon

The peanuts didn’t add much to the taste, and their texture is similar enough to the cone pieces that they kind of get lost in the mix. They don’t detract from the overall taste, but don’t expect a strong peanut flavor.

Anything else you need to know?

Apparently, the Drumstick Blizzard was available at Dairy Queens in Canada for a time in 2015, but if you want to know why it took five years to make it to the United States, I have no answer for you.

Also, the Drumstick was invented in 1928 by one of the Parker Brothers — not the Parker Brothers responsible for Monopoly and a bunch of other board games, though. The two sets of Parkers were both around about the same time (Monopoly came out in 1935), so I wonder if they knew of each other and had some sort of rivalry. It seems, however, I’m the only one to wonder that because the internet has nothing to offer on the topic.

Conclusion:

This Blizzard tastes exactly how you’d expect if you chopped off a bunch of Drumstick end pieces and blended them with peanuts and DQ soft serve. In other words, it’s awesome.

Purchased Price: $4.09
Size: Medium
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Medium) 1,030 calories, 53 grams of fat, 37 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 60 milligrams of cholesterol, 350 milligrams of sodium, 116 grams of carbohydrates, 4 grams of dietary fiber, 93 grams of sugar, and 22 grams of protein.

FAST FOOD NEWS: Papa John’s Shaq-a-Roni Pizza

News Shaq a roni

Update: We tried it! Click here to read our review.

Papa John’s is collaborating with one of its board members and restaurant owners, Shaquille O’Neal, to launch the new Shaq-a-Roni Pizza.

It’s an extra large pizza made with Papa John’s fresh, never frozen six-ingredient dough that’s topped with extra cheese and extra pepperoni, which is cut into Papa John’s largest foldable slice size ever. The pizza has a $12 suggested price.

According to its press release, for ever Shaq-a-Roni Pizza that’s sold, one dollar will be donated to The Papa John’s Foundation for Building Community to support COVID-19 relief, the fight against racial injustice, Boys & Girls Clubs of America, UNCF (United Negro College Fund), and general community involvement.

For those who order the pizza, there’s an exclusive Snapchat AR experience. Using the Snapchat app, customers simply point their camera at the pizza box to reveal a 3-D surprise.

(Image via Papa John’s.)

BACK ON SHELVES: Cocoa Puffs Brownie Crunch Cereal (2020)

Cocoa Puffs Brownie Crunch Cereal  2020

I thought General Mills used the exact same graphics that’s on the 2011 box, but it’s slightly different. The two most notable items with the box above are Sonny having a thumb and Sonny not looking like he licked a bowl of brownie batter. (Spotted by @TheJoshCatlett at Dierbergs.)

REVIEW: Life Cuisine Egg Bites

Life Cuisine Egg Bites

What are Life Cuisine Egg Bites?

The Life Cuisine brand (from Nestlé, who makes Lean Cuisine) was launched earlier this year to cater to “every lifestyle” with low carb, meatless, high protein, and gluten free options.

These egg bites are part of the low carb lineup and the only traditional breakfast items in the entire Life Cuisine line (although I would eat the gluten-free pizzas or the high protein taco bowl for breakfast). These sous vide egg bites come in two varieties: 1) Tomato & Spinach Egg White (also comes with mozzarella) and 2) Uncured Turkey Bacon & Aged White Cheddar (also comes with cottage cheese).

How are they?

Life Cuisine Egg Bites Frozen

Life Cuisine Egg Bites Plated

Most frozen products don’t look particularly appetizing when pulled from the freezer and the same goes for these frozen mounds. After being prepared for two minutes in the microwave, the aesthetics of the product do not increase as the egg bites keep their shape, but do puff out a little. The puff foreshadows their fluffy and light taste, which is consistent with what one might expect from a sous vide-prepared product.

Both varieties have predominantly an egg taste with a hint of other flavors.

Life Cuisine Egg Bites Egg White

The Tomato & Spinach Egg White one naturally lacks some of the creaminess that yolk provides. I could faintly taste the tomato and spinach, but there is not nearly as much tomato and spinach as shown on the box, which is a little misleading. However, the mozzarella cheese does come through. I would also add more pepper and salt to this one.

Life Cuisine Egg Bites White Cheddar

The turkey bacon in the other variety is prevalent, which also adds some saltiness. This one is higher in calories, fat, cholesterol, and sodium (see nutrition facts below). There’s more bacon and cheese in this egg bite and they’re better distributed, which results in a slightly more flavorful product.

Anything else you need to know?

These are light tasting products, which is a nice way to start your day if you are eating these for breakfast. After eating two of them (one of each variety), I thought I might need to supplement my breakfast, but I was surprisingly not hungry. Thanks, protein!

However, it should be noted that I am a smaller-framed individual and I can definitely see others needing more than two egg bites or adding items to their breakfast to feel satisfied.

Conclusion:

Life Cuisine Egg Bites do the trick if you are looking for a light and adequate tasting, quick, easy, and relatively healthy breakfast. At the same time, you can probably also just scramble an egg.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free samples of the products. Doing so did not influence my review in any way.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 4.5 oz (1 package of 2 egg bites)
Purchased at: Received from Life Cuisine
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Uncured Turkey Bacon & Aged White Cheddar), 6 out of 10 (Tomato & Spinach Egg White)
Nutrition Facts: (1 package) Uncured Turkey Bacon & Aged White Cheddar – 280 calories, 18 grams of fat, 10 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 185 milligrams of cholesterol, 810 milligrams of sodium, 12 grams of total carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 1 gram of sugar, 0 grams of added sugars, and 18 grams of protein. Tomato & Spinach Egg White – 190 calories, 9 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 610 milligrams of sodium, 12 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 1 gram of sugar, 0 grams of added sugars, and 15 grams of protein.

SPOTTED: Hostess Donettes Strawberry Cheesecake Mini Donuts

Hostess Donettes Strawberry Cheesecake Mini Donuts

I hate to admit this, but for a while, I thought “Donettes” was a combination of “donuts” and “Hostess.” Also, while I’m admitting stuff, I stole a tiny toy tugboat from a store in 1982. (Spotted by Bob K at Walmart.)