REVIEW: Dairy Queen Heath Caramel Brownie Blizzard

Dairy Queen Heath Caramel Brownie Blizzard

What is the Dairy Queen Heath Caramel Brownie Blizzard?

It’s the new Blizzard treat you spotted after you went back to Dairy Queen for your eleventh Pumpkin Pie Blizzard in the last two weeks. With Heath candy pieces added to a mix of chewy brownie pieces, caramel, and Dairy Queen soft serve, the new treat is trying to be a caramel brownie with a bit of toffee crunch.

How is it?

Dairy Queen Heath Caramel Brownie Blizzard Top

Surprisingly complex for what seems like a flavor that would have already been tried before. Since Heath pieces tend to be the most overlooked candy mix-ins ever, you never quite know what you’re getting when they’re included. But the hard crunch of the pieces is a good textural contrast to the slightly chewy and chocolatey brownie pieces, which are plentiful enough to give the Blizzard a chocolate flavor that makes the caramel aspect taste both rich and familiar.

Dairy Queen Heath Caramel Brownie Blizzard Mix ins

While the caramel flavor hangs in the background, the burnt sugar toffee of the Heath gives the Blizzard a new appeal that keeps it from getting boring.

Is there anything else you should know?

The level of your enjoyment for this will likely vary by the quality and quantity in which yours is made. That’s because the vanilla base seems like the wrong choice to host the established chocolate-caramel synergy, which was a letdown in the spoonfuls that didn’t get brownie pieces. And while the Heath pieces give the Blizzard an added element, they don’t define the baseline flavor the way that the brownie pieces do.

Conclusion:

Dairy Queen doesn’t make a bad Blizzard, and this Heath Caramel Brownie one is no exception. But I tend to think the line between very good and mind blown is pretty discernible, and this latest Blizzard doesn’t reach the latter category. It’s a shame Dairy Queen didn’t go all out and double down on the chocolate and caramel.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Mini) 370 calories, 14 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 54 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 44 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Harvest Berry Pie Blizzard

Dairy Queen Harvest Berry Pie Blizzard

What is the Harvest Berry Pie Blizzard?

It’s harvest time in the Dairy Queen kingdom, and the realm’s loyal subjects have rounded up a trifecta of berries – raspberries, blueberries, and blackberries — to mix with pie pieces and vanilla soft serve. It’s not the Blizzard of the Month for September though, as the retread Pumpkin Pie Blizzard gets that title, even though that version seems better suited for October or November.

How is it?

Dairy Queen Harvest Berry Pie Blizzard 3

Berry good. I mean very good. Of course, my Blizzard looked nothing like the promotional photo with plump berries happily swimming with their pie piece friends in an ice cream vortex. I could only find one near-intact berry on top, but there were plenty of berry pieces throughout and the crunch of the pie pieces added a nice texture to the softness of the fruit.

Dairy Queen Harvest Berry Pie Blizzard 2

It would be interesting to see how this Blizzard tastes with just one or two types of berries mixed in because the combination of all three creates an indistinct, somewhat tart berry flavor. What flavor is it? Is purple berry a flavor? It’s not a bad flavor. It’s just nothing special. Even when I got a decent size chunk of fruit in a bite, it was hard to tell which one it was with the other two berries also fighting for the attention of my taste buds.

Is there anything else you need to know?

You might think that with three types of fruit this Blizzard would be healthier than other DQ concoctions. Well, you’d be wrong. I guess it doesn’t matter what you mix in with soft serve and pie pieces because the result is going to be a high-calorie and high-carb sugar bomb. Even though this looks more like a smoothie than a Blizzard, nutritionally speaking it’s about the same as the ones loaded up with chocolate and candy. And most smoothies are not that healthy either. If you’ve ever looked at the nutritional info, they are also packed with sugar and carbs, which is precisely why they taste so good.

And as the photos attest, my local DQ apparently has no mini Blizzard cups, nor did they last time I visited. The coffee cup certainly did the job to insulate my treat and keep it from melting, but it’s still a bit off-putting to see a picture of steaming coffee as I wolf down a Blizzard.

Conclusion:

You can safely order this Blizzard without fear of having your mind blown, socks knocked off, world being rocked or other cliché of your choice, but the Harvest Berry Pie Blizzard is a nice change of pace if you are looking for something without chocolate and candy that will give you or your loved ones the false impression that you are trying to eat something healthy.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Mini) 380 calories, 16 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 25 milligrams of cholesterol, 190 milligrams of sodium, 52 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 39 grams of sugar, and 7 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Snickers Peanut Butter Pie Blizzard

Dairy Queen Snickers Peanut Butter Pie Blizzard

What is the Snickers Peanut Butter Pie Blizzard?

It’s Dairy Queen’s co-Blizzard of the Month for August with its less fancy cousin Snickers Blizzard, which is a returning flavor. In addition to the titular candy, the Snickers Peanut Butter Pie Blizzard includes peanut butter and graham blended with vanilla soft serve.

How is it?

Straightforwardly solid. There’s not a whole lot of surprise in this Blizzard. If you like Snickers and peanut butter, then you are going to love this. As one who falls into that category, I figured this would be pretty good, and it was. The graham adds a nice layer of flavor, and all three elements blend together without any of them overpowering each other.

Dairy Queen Snickers Peanut Butter Pie Blizzard Closeup

With the peanuts in the Snickers and peanut butter, I thought there might be a little peanut overload, but I didn’t find that to be the case. This Blizzard is the opposite of Forrest Gump’s box of chocolates — you pretty much know what you are going to get…a pretty tasty treat. Nothing more, nothing less.

Is there anything else you need to know?

You are supposed to learn something new every day. I don’t know who made up that rule, and I’ve lived my life choosing to mostly ignore that advice. My brain can only hold so much information. But during this review, I learned Dairy Queen has coffee, or at least I’m pretty sure they do since my Blizzard was served in a generic coffee cup, presumably because my local DQ ran out of mini Blizzard cups.

Dairy Queen Snickers Peanut Butter Pie Blizzard Snickers Bar

OK, the fact that DQ serves hot brown caffeinated water is not an earth-shaking revelation, and perhaps you already knew that. But not being a coffee drinker, I had no idea. I also learned that using an actual Snickers bar as a spoon is a great idea, despite the weird looks I got. So I learned two things today, freeing up my schedule to learn absolutely nothing tomorrow.

Conclusion:

With so many Blizzard combinations over the years, it’s hard for any mixture to rise above the rest without throwing in a truly unique ingredient or flavor. Of course, neither Snickers nor peanut butter qualifies as such. But even so, this is a good addition to the Blizzard lineup and a tasty, if unspectacular, way to wind down summer.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Mini) 450 calories, 21 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 230 milligrams of sodium, 57 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 45 grams of sugar, and 9 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard

Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard

When you look at the list of possible Blizzard ingredients on the menu board, which oddly DQ doesn’t really publicize you can use to create a customized creation to your liking, just about everything has been already done between the regular Blizzard menu, Blizzards of the Month, a plethora of seasonal Blizzard menus, plus special Blizzards with movie tie-ins or for the second Tuesday of Lent. DQ has essentially admitted that all the reasonable combinations have been tried, as they tend to recycle some of the same or very similar Blizzards now and then.

Enter the Sour Patch Kids Blizzard, which as far as I can tell after four seconds of online research, is the first time DQ has used these sweet and sour gummies. This latest concoction features vanilla soft serve with Sour Patch Kids Redberry flavor (don’t worry, I didn’t know it was called that either) mixed with Sour Patch Kids Bitz.

The first thing that caught my attention was the smell, which is not something I normally notice or think about with a Blizzard. But this one exudes a fragrant essence of Sour Patch Kids, just like opening a bag of the tasty little fellows.

I’m not sure if the Sour Patch Kids in here were mutilated by the magic Blizzard machine, or if DQ calling them “Bitz” means they were already hacked to pieces before the mixing process. Either way, the pieces of kids are approximately the size of Nerds (which made me pine for the long-deceased Nerds Blizzard of years gone by).

Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard Top

The Bitz in mine didn’t seem to be as large or as plentiful as the promotional photos show, but I might have had a frugal and overzealous mixer. As you might have guessed, the coldness of the ice cream changes the firmness of the Sour Patch Kids a bit. They didn’t have the same soft chewiness you might be accustomed to, but I didn’t find that to be a drawback, and they do pack a sour punch.

The Redberry-flavored soft serve tasted great, like DQ somehow liquified a bag of red Sour Patch Kids and infused it into the ice cream. But before they liquefied the poor little kids, DQ apparently removed the sour coating because the ice cream flavor was all sweetness, and it was splendid. As a standalone treat, I’d eat the ice cream part all day (and all night).

Dairy Queen Sour Patch Kids Blizzard Spoon

The kicker is the little chunks of Sour Patch Kids, which of course still have the sour coating and seemed to have a delayed effect on my taste buds. So first you get the sweetness of the Redberry-flavored ice cream, then slowly you experience the sour flavor in your mouth as the Bitz free themselves from their ice cream cocoons, and then finally you get the sweetness again when you get to the gummy part of the Sour Patch Kids.

Sometimes you don’t know how much you wanted something until you see it, or in this case, taste it. Of all the possible things that can be thrown into a Blizzard, I’m not sure I would have thought of Sour Patch Kids. But I’m glad the Blizzard wizards at DQ gave it a try because it’s a winner in my book and a nice change of pace from some other recent Blizzards that always seem to revolve around chocolate, Oreo, or Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. Since Sour Patch Kids are not a regular DQ menu item, this one figures to be gone for good after July. You have been warned.

Purchased Price: $3.79
Size: Small
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Small) 660 calories, 24 grams of fat, 11 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 190 milligrams of sodium, 82 grams of carbohydrates, -1 grams of dietary fiber*, 86 grams of sugar, and 12 grams of protein.

*The DQ website inexplicably lists a negative amount of dietary fiber. I’m no mathematician or nutritionist, but that seems to be impossible on many levels.

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REVIEW: Dairy Queen Zero Gravity Blizzard

Dairy Queen Zero Gravity Blizzard

When I saunter into my local Dairy Queen and order a Blizzard, I do so because it tastes good and is the most efficient way to significantly exceed my recommended daily allowance of sugar and saturated fat. I don’t buy one because it’s pretty and will get me likes on Instagram. With many Blizzards featuring varying shades of brown with a mix of chunks, they don’t really match up with some of those made-for-social-media drinks at the place that sells overpriced coffee.

But the new Zero Gravity Blizzard — here for a limited time to celebrate the upcoming 50th anniversary of the July 20, 1969, moon landing — is a bit different.

For one thing, the name doesn’t even hint at its contents, unlike most Blizzard variations that pretty much give away the composition if you just ignore the superfluous superlatives, like outrageous or ultimate. This version offers Oreo cookie pieces mixed with cotton candy topping and vanilla soft serve, plus “space inspired iridescent blue and black swirls and galaxy sprinkles.” Even that description leaves some mystery, like what the heck is that whole last part? Well, it’s basically a lot of words and not a lot of taste.

I do have to give DQ credit for trying to up their game with this Blizzard and making an Instagram-worthy treat without going full Starbucks on us and using dragon fruit, passion fruit, or some other fruit that I’m not 100-percent certain really exists but don’t care enough to check.

Even so, this one is a bit of a letdown, starting with the name. In fact, Zero Gravity would be a good name for virtually any Blizzard variety except this one. We all know the standard presentation method for a Blizzard is a quick upside-down flip by the server, possibly followed by a smile and/or thank you (but those are optional). With the Zero Gravity, however, the DQ employee sheepishly explained that she was not going to turn it upside-down because “a lot of it would probably fall out.”

Huh? Does this even qualify as a Blizzard?

She hurried off before I had a chance to question this shocking revelation or inquire whether said Blizzard would be free because I vaguely remember that being the deal between the Queen of cow juice and her loyal subjects—that a Blizzard presented without the wrist-flip would be free.

Dairy Queen Zero Gravity Blizzard Tilt

So what did I do? Not wanting to fully test the power of gravity, I gave my “Zero Gravity” Blizzard a very slight and quick tilt. Gravity did indeed respond at a level well above zero and promptly sent some of my Blizzard on to the table of questionable cleanliness, as the photo attests.

Dairy Queen Zero Gravity Blizzard Blue

Dairy Queen Zero Gravity Blizzard Below

So what I had was an inaccurately named yet pretty spiffy-looking Blizzard. Now here’s the second letdown…it doesn’t taste that great. Sure, the mix of soft serve and Oreo is good, but the cotton candy flavor is very faint and hard to distinguish. The mysterious blue and black swirls have virtually no taste, and neither do the sprinkles; all that added was some shimmer and sparkle. Essentially what you have is a very colorful Oreo blizzard, which after you get past the top layer is considerably less colorful.

Dairy Queen Zero Gravity Blizzard Spoon

The Zero Gravity Blizzard is like one of those checks you get in the mail for some class action lawsuit about defective jelly beans in which you had no idea you were involved. You can tell from the envelope that it’s a check and perhaps get a little excited, until you open it and see that it’s for $1.21. An unexpected check like that is not bad, but it’s a bit disappointing and not what you had hoped for. Just like the Zero Gravity Blizzard.

Purchased Price: $4.29
Size: Small
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts:: (Small) 670 calories, 26 grams of fat, 14 grams of saturated fat, 0.5 gram of trans fat, 45 milligrams of cholesterol, 300 milligrams of sodium, 98 grams of carbohydrates, -1 grams of dietary fiber*, 80 grams of sugar, and 13 grams of protein.

*It would seem to defy the laws of mathematics to have -1 grams of fiber, but that’s what it says on the DQ website and the Internet never lies.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Reese’s Lovers Blizzards

Dairy Queen Reese s Lovers Blizzards

Should it be Blizzards of the Month or Blizzard of the Months? Or should we throw in some random apostrophes somewhere? The reason for these grammatical and punctuative predicaments is that Dairy Queen has unleashed both the Reese’s Peanut Butter Lovers and Reese’s Chocolate Lovers to battle for the title of Blizzard of the Month for June.

OK, so there’s no battle, but with two choices this month, plus the previously announced Summer Blizzard Menu with five other options, it’s enough for a Blizzard party!

Apparently with two new offerings to create, the Blizzard wizards at DQ could only muster half the creativity this month, as each of these are about as straightforward as can be. The peanut butter version has Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups mixed into a blend of vanilla soft serve and peanut butter topping, while the chocolate version substitutes fudge topping instead peanut butter.

While DQ will collect no prizes this month for thinking outside of the box, that doesn’t mean these Blizzards are not good just because they are close cousins to several previous Reese’s-inspired concoctions. In fact, they are genuinely good, proving again that sometimes the tried-and-true simple approach works just fine.

So, which one is better? That will depend largely — and not surprisingly — on whether you prefer peanut butter or chocolate.

Reese’s Peanut Butter Lovers

Dairy Queen Reese s Peanut Butter Lovers Blizzard

My go-to Blizzard has always been the straight-up Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup, but with all the new varieties being offered recently I can’t remember the last time I noshed on my old friend. (Note to self: Never use that phrasing again). So I got a little misty-eyed when I dug into the Reese’s Peanut Butter Lovers Blizzard.

Dairy Queen Reese s Peanut Butter Lovers Blizzard Closeup

A Blizzard with just vanilla soft serve and peanut butter cups is perfectly good, but the addition of the peanut butter topping here really adds something. Again, no awards for creativity, but it’s a simple and solid improvement over the standard PB cup Blizzard. After tasting this version, I’ll be asking for a shot or two of that sweet peanut butter topping to be added to my standard PB cup Blizzard in the future.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Not available on the DQ website

Reese’s Chocolate Lovers

Dairy Queen Reese s Chocolate Lovers Blizzard

If you really, really love chocolate, then you’ll likely really, really love the Reese’s Chocolate Lovers Blizzard. Perhaps my Blizzard barista got a little carried away with the fudge, but I found this one to be a bit too chocolatey to the point where the flavor of the peanut butter cups struggled to make much of an impact on my taste buds.

Dairy Queen Reese s Chocolate Lovers Blizzard Closeup

Certainly this is still a good Blizzard, even though, assuming you like chocolate, peanut butter, and soft serve, it’s hard to screw something like this up. But for me, it had just a little too much chocolate. Your results may vary.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Not available on the DQ website

Dairy Queen Reese s Lovers Blizzards Party

So if one version is for hardcore chocolate lovers and the other is for peanut butter aficionados, what would happen if you combined them into one spoonful? Well, I’m glad you asked, or more correctly, that I asked myself.

Dairy Queen Reese s Lovers Blizzard Combo

The combination of both — not unlike when Mr. H.B. Reese brought together chocolate and peanut butter in cup form — is quite tasty. Depending on which part of the spoonful hit my tongue first, I got a nice alternation of flavors throughout my Blizzard meal. Sure, it was a bit awkward to order two Blizzards while dining alone and having people look at me sitting in a booth while wondering if my DQ date had stood me up, but I really don’t care.

By the way, in case the Grammar Police are (or is?) watching, the correct answer to the above is Blizzards of the Month.