Tag: Gum

REVIEW: Trident Layers Sweet Cherry + Island Lime Gum

Stephanie 3 Comments

Trident Layers Sweet Cherry + Island Lime

The first thing that occurred to me when I purchased my trim, little magenta-and-white package of Trident Layers Sweet Cherry and Island Lime sugar free gum is that it sounds like a 70’s-era grindhouse action duo. Sweet Cherry is the prostitute-turned-undercover-inner-city-vice-detective and Island Lime is her hard-hitting, trash-talking, crime-solving Rastafarian partner.

I should invent a secret time machine and become a 70’s Hollywood producer. I’d make millions….. MILLIONS!!! (But maybe not if I forget to adjust for inflation.) The second thing that occurred to me is that it looks like the lime is violently bisecting the cherry on the package. This gum will be rated R.

Trident Layers Sweet Cherry + Island Lime Closeup

The Sweet Cherry and Island Lime gum itself is shaped like a rectangular block. Upon first chew, you immediately taste a strong splash of artificial lime flavor. Not terrible, but a bit too strong. Then the cherry flavor comes in. It’s not as potent as the lime… definitely more understated. The cherry is a subtle low note to the lime’s sparking high note. Though I soon began to wish the lime would shut up.

Like other Trident Layers gum flavors, the taste disappears after only a couple minutes of vigorous chewing. I thought for a second that maybe I was chewing too hard, and then I remembered that this is America, and I will chew my gum as hard and as quickly as I damn well please. Nonetheless, I did attempt to chew another piece more slowly to see if the sweetness would stick around longer, but alas, it wasn’t enough to prolong the fruity sensation. If this were one of those old gum commercials where the blast of flavor was portrayed as a bitchin’ wave, I would’ve bottomed out on the ocean floor and shredded my face on a coral reef in seconds. Totally NOT tubular, dude.

Trident Layers Sweet Cherry + Island Lime Opened

Trident Layers Sweet Cherry and Island Lime gum is all right, but its flavor lacks longevity, and even if it did last longer, I probably wouldn’t like it because the artificial sweetness is too much. The overall flavor profile of cherry mixed with lime is that of a jaunty cocktail minus the alcohol (a mocktail), although I guess you could chew this gum immediately after downing a couple shots of straight vodka and really have yourself a drink. I’d imagine you’re saving that kind of thing for the weekend. Or for when Sweet Cherry and Island Lime’s Badasssssss Fruit Splash Song premieres in a theater near you, back in 1974. But perhaps I’ve said too much.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 stick – 5 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 2 grams of carbohydrates, and 0 grams of sugar.)

Item: Trident Layers Sweet Cherry + Island Lime Gum
Price: $0.99
Size: 14 pieces per pack
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 4 out of 10
Pros: High notes of lime flavor accompany low notes of cherry very well. Exploitation cinema. Chewing your gum American-style. Mimics the flavor of jaunty, fruit-flavored mocktails. Time machines.
Cons: Artificial sweetness is overpowering. Flavor doesn’t last long. Mocktails. Wipe out, dude. Forgetting to adjust for inflation.

REVIEW: Wrigley’s 5 Swerve Gum

Marvo 4 Comments

Wrigley's 5 Swerve

I’m going to help Wrigley Gum.

I’ve come up with a bunch of names they can use for free for any upcoming Wrigley’s 5 flavor. Why free? Because I’m too lazy (and cheap) to file trademarks with the United States Patent and Trademark Office.

I was surprised by how easy it was to come up with possible names. If you look at all the current flavors, it appears naming them involves either watching the Weather Channel (Rain, Solstice, Flare, and Vortex), throwing darts at the Periodic Table of Elements (Cobalt), or pulling random words at Urban Dictionary (Elixir, Lush, and Zing). So that’s what I did.

So here you go, Wrigley: Lunar, Polar, Reverb, Iridium, Mackadocious, Tungsten, Arcus, Radium, Aurora, Nickel, Ununhexium, Neon, Xenon, Razor, Fierce, Uranium, Plutonium, Avalanche, Blizzard, Brisk, Thrill, Celsius, Fahrenheit, Savage, Corona, Cyclone, Glam, Dew, Smooth, Flood, Kewl, Freeze, Halo, Radballs, Hurricane, Matrix, Iridescence, Redonkulous, Mist, Nocturnal, Fizzy, Nucleus, Ozone, Sassy, Crystal, Pulse, Solar, Crisp, Storm, Thermal, Thunder, Typhoon, Volcano, Vapor, Wave, Zodiac, and Tits.

You’re welcome, Wrigley.

Swerve was another word I found at Urban Dictionary, but it’s already being used by Wrigley for their latest addition to the 5 Gum line. For some of you who talk or text on your cell phone while driving, I’m pretty sure you’re quite familiar with the word “swerve”…and middle fingers. Wrigley has taken that word and used it to name their latest gum and its ability to go from a tangy to a sweet tropical flavor.

Wrigley’s 5 Swerve Gum is the second tropical flavor in the 5 Gum line, with the other being Lush.

Wrigley's 5 Swerve Closeup

Swerve’s initial sourness wasn’t harsh and it had a little citrus flavor to it. The sour flavor goes away after 30 seconds and then you’re left with a standard tropical flavor, which tastes like it’s made up of some citrus, pineapple, and another fruit I couldn’t make out. It’s good, but I think I prefer Lush’s tropicalness.

Swerve significantly loses its flavor after 45-60 seconds and become a bit tougher to chew. After 3-4 minutes of chewing, I thought the gum had reached well beyond its end of life and deserved to be placed at (but most likely spat towards) the bottom of Hefty Jones’ Locker, which is what I call my trash bag-lined trash can.

Wrigley’s 5 Swerve Gum is good for about 60-90 seconds, but after that it makes a sharp swerve downhill. So, perhaps, Wrigley should rename this gum using another term I found on Urban Dictionary — Minute Man. Because, like all minute men, it doesn’t last very long.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 stick – 5 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 2 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, 2 grams of sugar alcohol, and 0 grams of protein.)

Item: Wrigley’s 5 Swerve Gum
Price: $1.29
Size: 15 pieces
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Pleasant sour flavor. Good tropical flavor. Sugar-free. How easy it is to come up with possible Wrigley’s 5 gum names. Only five calories per stick. Urban Dictionary.
Cons: Doesn’t last very long. Gets tougher to chew after 60 seconds. Referring to Urban Dictionary for the billionth time in a review. The cost of filing trademarks. People who talk or text on their cell phones while driving.

REVIEW: Mentos UP2U Gum (Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh and Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint)

Jeff 5 Comments

Mentos UP2U Gum (Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh and Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint)

On the growing list of things I do not look competent doing, gum chewing is right in between “throwing a football around with the guys” and dancing. After a marathon of John Woo films in college (Dolph Lundgren wasn’t so bad in Blackjack, right?), I caught myself in the mirror chewing gum. Instead of that cool and casual look almost everyone has when they chew, I looked like a hamster with a bunch of sunflower seeds in my cheek. I don’t hate gum chewing; I just hate myself chewing gum.

Having a pleasant breath is important to me. My job entails a lot of talking to an audience, a great deal of whining, some begging, a bit of folding my arms as if I am making a point and an uncomfortable amount of quiet farting. …You know what I am talking about.

Speaking of unwanted odors, I am hyper aware of bad breath. I habitually pop Altoids in my mouth and avoid gum. I one time had a piece of Wrigley’s because I was out of mints and the result was at Hindenburg levels. I was just nibbling the gum which made me look like I had that “grinding teeth” problem and I ended up biting the side of mouth. The mint gave way to the copper taste of blood that my unforgiving teeth drew. That was the last time I can remember chewing gum.

As I was in the line of impatient customers waiting to check out at Target, I saw the usual suspects of candy bars and ultra-mint gums that promise refreshment that will give you icy cold breath that act like Mr. Freeze’s ray gun. However something caught my eye. It wasn’t that pack of Stride with Shaun White eerily staring and beckoning me to walk into oncoming traffic.

It was gum made by Mentos and I couldn’t stop staring at the package because the name was so weird if not a bit annoying. UP2U gum by Mentos and the name was boldly stamped across the pack. The UP2U was in all caps and the name was so strange. It felt like I was reading those awful vanity plates on the road that say “B Kewl” or “IM Awz0m”. UP2UdamnU! UP2ME? Well then I had to try it since it was UP2WHATIWANTED2DO and NO1 can tell me what 2DO.

See what I mean? A bit annoying, L-O-L. L-M-F-A-O and all that jazz.

The package proclaims “2 Flavors. 1 Pack. You Decide.” Kind of like our electoral process don’t ya think?

I felt compelled to try them since I’ve been a fan of Mentos from the early days of their odd Eurotrash-like commercials. Each package had two flavors, and there were two varieties so I had to try both of them, which is really four of them since, so I had to try all four of them…God, this is more complicated than string theory.

Okay, to simplify I bought the pink pack which had Sweet Mint and Bubble Fresh while the blue-green pack had Daylight Mint and Mintnight Mint. I believe there are other flavors but my Target only had these two.

Mentos UP2U Gum (Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh and Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint) Inside Packs

I have to admit that the packaging is quite chic, albeit a bit pretentious. In fact it looks like a sleek compact minus the brush and makeup. They both open like a mini book where one flavor resides on each respective side. The pink one with Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh has a quote by poet John Millington Synge while Walt Whitman (it would be cool if they called him Walt Whitmint) greets me on the other one.

The effect is no different than cracking open a fortune cookie and scoffing at the supposed inspiration (i.e. “You have many friends” or “A man with a great heart is richer than the man with the great wallet”—pphht!). It’s chew time.

Mentos UP2U Gum (Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh and Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint) Unwrapped

Mintnight Mint is not as minty nor as mintnighty as I would like. It’s a bit like that tiny bottle of no name hotel mouthwash that sits next to the shower cap. The mint tastes like timid spearmint but an unappealing rush of sugary sweetness overrides everything. I’ve smoked menthol cigarettes that had a stronger mint taste. Hell, the Girl Scouts’ Thin Mints cookies are more minty. The flavor also dissipates quicker than your average stick of mint gum. The name however, is amusing as I picture a vampire with fresh breath.

Daylight Mint, its resident brother has a weird texture. It was stiff not unlike those crappy sticks you would get from ripping open a pack of baseball cards and had a give like gummi bears. The mint was even less intense than the Mintnight one.

If you consume saltines or seltzer water, this mint will struggle to mask your breath. The mint tastes like the wintergreen variety but after the first few chews, this flavor goes away and again is replaced by that syrupy sugar taste. I wanted to spit this out immediately. Like Neil Tennant sang in Brit supergroup Electronic, “Dissapointed…”

Do not depend on the package containing Mintnight and Daylight mints to do anything to freshen your breath. I’m not sure what qualifies as a daytime or nighttime flavor but they should not be chewed anytime.

Mentos UP2U Gum (Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh and Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint) Pieces

Bubble Fresh is an interesting flavor. It tastes like the usual bubblegum but there is a tang like those sour candies without the sourness if that makes any sense. I really liked this flavor as it was a good play on the ordinary bubblegum flavor we all know. It was not overly sweet and there is a bit of a mint that works well, hence the fresh part. The gum itself was a very soft chew which is nice. Both combined flavors lasted quite some time and the mint lingered for a while.

I recommend this one if you love mint but you want a new spin on the flavor. I would equate it like this: sometimes you just want a comfy old burger with that melty processed cheese but once in a while you want a burger topped with yummy Applewood smoked bacon, aged cheddar and onion jam. By no means is Bubble Fresh as good as bacon but it’s familiar in taste with a surprising twist.

Sweet Mint is funny in a good way. It is the least sweet of the four and the most intense in mint. The taste is very pleasant as the mint slowly builds in your mouth and then it fades into the sweetness. This is the important factor, the sweetness is not cloying or fake sugary like that weird aunt you hate. Additionally, the mint stays in your mouth and with each chew, it maintained a freshness in my breath.

I can recommend the Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh pack. The flavors are good, the mint stays with you and the package despite its snobbery, is fun. The Daylight/Mintnight is a fiasco and if it were UP2U…I would avoid it.

(Nutritional Facts – 1 piece – less than 5 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, 1 gram of sugar alcohols, and 0 grams of protein.)

Item: Mentos UP2U Gum (Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh and Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint)
Price: $1.29 each
Size: 14 pieces per pack (7 pieces each per flavor)
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Sweet Mint/Bubble Fresh)
Rating: 2 out of 10 (Daylight Mint/Mintnight Mint)
Pros: Sweet Mint is a good mint gum that’s not really sweet. Bubble Fresh is indeed a fresh take on the mint gum. John Woo’s Hard Boiled (Only the Cantonese version). Old Target commercials with the coolest indy songs. The packaging is admittedly cool.
Cons: Daylight and Mintnight mint gums are weak in the mint and taste department. The texture of Daylight is stiff. John Woo’s Mission Impossible 2 (any version). Those old weird Mentos commercials. Vanity plates. Bad breath. I chewed all four together, that was a mistake.

REVIEW: Extra Dessert Delights Apple Pie Gum

Stephanie 4 Comments

Extra Dessert Delights Apple Pie Gum

There were quite a few things in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory that I wanted to experience for myself when I was a kid. Not the chocolate waterfall (that chocolate looked extremely thin and watery – not how I picture milk chocolate, mixed or not… and the fact that a nasty little boy fell in it with his shoes on made the idea of eating any of it repellant). Certainly not the Psychedelic Nightmare Tunnel (a chicken got its head cut off! ITS HEAD!!). Nope, I wanted to try Wonka’s experimental sweets… and one of the samples provided to the unsuspecting boys and girls on the factory tour was that magical stick of gum, the one that mimicked a three-course dinner. I was always really jealous of Violet when she selfishly stuffed the three-course meal gum in her maw and described each course in detail… that is, I was jealous until she changed into a giant blueberry. Not for me, thanks.

My point is that I no longer have to feel jealous, for Extra Dessert Delights has introduced their latest sugar-free addition, “Apple Pie” – and it tastes like apple pie. It’s been mentioned before on this site that these new dessert- and cocktail-flavored chewing gums are creeping ever closer to Willy Wonka territory with their magical simulations of actual food. It’s pretty neat.

But that isn’t to say it’s not eerie. Like Wonka himself, the idea is a bit… off.

When a couple of office pals and I sampled the gum, the consensus was that Dessert Delights Apple Pie was simultaneously gross and tasty; real-tasting and unnatural. I liked the gum a little better than they did, but we all agreed that cramming the intense flavor of apple pie into a stick of gum was bizarre. Did someone really think that it would be an adequate substitute for real apple pie? On the go, sure it’s fine… but I certainly wouldn’t want to find myself at a friend’s picnic, longing for dessert, only to be handed a stick of sugar-free gum. I’d kick my friend in the ass for pulling a stunt like that. But I digress.

Extra Dessert Delights Apple Pie Gum Stick

The gum is light green, which would make you think of mint-flavored gum if it weren’t for the overpowering aroma of cinnamon and (…dare I say it? Yes, I dare…) buttery crust. I could smell that long before I could smell the slight scent of apples. Once I started chewing, the flavor exploded into a complex combination of Granny Smith apples, cinnamon, and sugar. It was definitely apple pie.

Unfortunately, the Apple Pie gum began to lose its softness and flavor rather quickly. I’m talking within seconds. It became tacky and stiff the longer I chewed, and the taste of apples and spices soon dissolved into a generic, artificial-apple-tinged sweetness that was just “blah.” I was disappointed that the flavor pretty much vanished altogether after just a few minutes of chewing.

Despite this, I guess it’s nice to have a pack around for a quick chew if you’re in the mood for something sweet at work or school and don’t want to visit the vending machine for one of those trans-fat-tastic packaged apple fritter pastry thingies — you know, the ones with the waxy glaze that makes the plastic all shiny and oily. Why eat something like that and have it clog your arteries when you can get a similar flavor in a stick of gum that you can spit out after? Choices, people.

Like nearly every one of these flavored dessert gums, Extra Dessert Delights Apple Pie had a strong start and a weak finish. Though I held out much longer than my coworkers, I definitely reached the end of the line on that flavor train. At least I didn’t turn into a giant green apple. Sure, I’d be able to leave work early, but I don’t think I could fit in my car.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 stick – 5 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 2 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, 2 grams of sugar alcohol and 0 grams of protein.)

Other Extra Dessert Delights Apple Pie Gum reviews:
Gum Alert
TV & Gum Are Awesome
The Smart Cookie Cook

Item: Extra Dessert Delights Apple Pie Gum
Price: $0.99
Size: 15 sticks per pack
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: A fun new addition to Extra Dessert Delights variety. Approximates the flavor of apples, cinnamon and buttery crust rather well for a stick of gum. Nice alternative to greasy apple pie fritters in the vending machine. Leaving work early because you turned into a giant piece of fruit.
Cons: Flavor doesn’t last very long. Watching chickens get their heads chopped off. Cramming the flavor of apple pie into a stick of gum is bizarre. Suffering a total body transformation on an all-expenses-paid factory tour as punishment for your selfishness and greed.

REVIEW: Whitemint Stride Gum

Marvo 4 Comments

Stride Whitemint

If snowboarder/skateboarder/redhead Shaun White ever forgets his name, I hope he’s carrying around a pack of his Whitemint Stride Gum because it’ll help him remember his name quickly since it’s printed ALL OVER the gum’s packaging.

His name is on the front of the pack. It’s on the top and bottom of the pack. His signature is on the back of the pack. Oh, but that’s not all. The wrapper that surrounds each piece of Whitemint Stride Gum also has his name on it…many times. I estimate Shaun White’s name is printed more than a hundred times on and in each pack of his gum.

I’ve seen his name so many times now that I’m beginning to think my name is Shaun White.

Personally, I’m surprised Stride didn’t go that extra mile and engrave his name on the back and front of each piece of gum. Although, maybe if I look at the packaging through a powerful microscope, I’ll see that all the graphics are made using microscopic printings of Shaun White’s name.

That would blow my mind.

Unfortunately, I don’t have a microscope, or access to one of the labs at the nearby university that have microscopes because I’m not allowed on campus for one year due to “complaints” from female students, so I can’t find out.

But I hope the graphic designer who came up with the packaging designed it with tiny printing, because, if so, Whitemint Stride Gum would have something exciting about it, since its flavor isn’t completely compelling.

Stride Whitemint Closeup

I swear Whitemint Stride Gum tastes like another Stride Gum flavor, but I’m not sure which one since Stride seems to develop a new mint flavor every six months or so. It has a mild sweet mint flavor, so it could be Sweet Peppermint Stride Gum. Or it could be the sweet and minty Nonstop Mint Stride Gum.

Whitemint Stride Gum is available for a limited time, so don’t expect to see it forever in the checkout line with all the gum, candy, and tabloids you could impulsively buy. While its flavor didn’t blow my mind, like watching Shaun White shred in a half-pipe, I did enjoy having it in my mouth for 15-30 minutes and I also liked the fact that I can chew on it during that time without having to worry about it getting hard in my mouth.

With this gum being able to last as long as it does, I could chew on it while counting all the times Shaun White’s name appears on and in each Whitemint Stride Gum pack and then compare it to the number of times the word “yeah” is said in Usher’s song “Yeah!”

(Nutrition Facts – 1 piece – less than 5 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, 1 gram of sugar alcohol, and 0 grams of protein.)

Item: Whitemint Stride Gum
Price: $1.24
Size: 14 pieces
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Decent sweet mint flavor. Pleasant texture. It’s ridiculously long lasting. Watching Shaun White shred on a halfpipe.
Cons: Tastes like another Stride Gum flavor. Flavor isn’t totally exciting. Shaun White’s name is printed way too many times. Wondering whether the word “shred” is still cool.