The Colonel has entered the (pickle) chat!

As mentioned in my Popeyes Fried Pickle review, I’m a proud pickle enthusiast. While I’ve since run out of pickle toothpaste, I’ve moved on to delights like pickle de gallo and pickle chips. Shake Shack’s version recently let me down, but that’s a review for another day.

Let me rewind for a moment. The Colonel and I go way back. As a kid, KFC was my go-to. Apparently, it’s slipped to #4 nationally now, but back then, it was my #1 weekly tradition. I loved the silky, overprocessed mashed potatoes and especially those biscuits. KFC was a summer staple in my household.

Fast-forward to today. I hadn’t been to KFC in a minute, but when I heard about its new fried pickles, I was drawn in like a magpie to something shiny. This time, the shiny thing was golden-fried pickle coins.

These pickles are part of KFC’s new “Comeback Era” menu, a refresh inspired by customer feedback. They’re described as “golden-fried dill pickle slices that are the perfect crispy bite.” No signage was up yet at the location I visited, but the staff kindly clued me in: 8 pieces for $3.79 or a 45-piece family pack for $14.99. The family pack was tempting, but I hesitated. What if they weren’t good?!

I played it safe and chose the 8-piece. They arrived hot and fresh in a nugget box. I had hoped for something more pickle-themed, but not a big dill.

First test: shape. Coin-shaped, not spears. That’s a win; I’m firmly in the “coins have better crispy-to-cuke ratio” camp. They were also properly golden-fried – so far, so good.

The breading was flavorful, similar to Popeyes’, but without the Cajun kick. That tracks, since Cajun isn’t really KFC’s thing. I chose ranch as a dipping sauce, but it wasn’t really necessary. The pickles held their own. I did feel noticeably thirstier after eating them, though, which hadn’t happened with Popeyes.

However, there was a bit of sogginess between the breading and the pickle, and they were definitely oily. My napkin had the receipts after just eight pieces.

All in all, Popeyes still holds the S-tier fried pickle crown among national chains. But since theirs were limited-time only, KFC will do for now. I may even spring for the 45-piece!

Unfortunately, it’s also a limited-time item, so I’ll be on the hunt for my next fix soon. One of these chains really needs to make it permanent already!!

Purchased Price: $3.79
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 8pc – 290 calories, 16 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 1400 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 0 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

When it comes to ubiquitous fast-food joints, there’s one place I always pass by, but… well, usually pass on, and that’s KFC.

I don’t know what it is. I like KFC. I grew up loving KFC, but I never crave KFC.

It just hasn’t done much to get me excited over the past decade plus. Its chicken sandwich was good enough, and I dug the little snack wraps that come and go, but outside of those, I can’t remember the last time I genuinely wanted KFC. Gimmicky Double Downs and wet nuggets didn’t excite me, but for some reason, the new Mashed Potato Poppers instantly grabbed my attention.

I’m a mark for any new potato product. I could sit here and explain all the preparations for potatoes I enjoy like a regular Benjamin Buford Blue, but we have word limits.

That said, potatoes are arguably the most versatile food on Earth, and it’s rare for something to hit the market that I’m unfamiliar with.

Mashed Potato Poppers are essentially what they sound like: clumps of mash fried into a crispy little ball. They exist somewhere between a tot and a croquette – at least, they should.

Calling these potato croquettes would be stolen valor, something ol’ Harland Sanders knows plenty about.

My poppers were anything but poppin’.

I expected a warm, crispy shell with a smooth mashed potato filling, but what I got was a crusty, bland fritter with an arid blotch of porous potato inside. Of the five in my order, I would say two were promising.

I see the vision. I think these are probably kinda good if eaten in the right occasion. Mine may have sat around a bit too long. I used the app on the way over to the restaurant (at a red light, relax) and didn’t arrive for another 3-5 minutes … which, come on, is not exactly a long time, but something tells me these actually “pop” if eaten immediately from the fryer.

When I think of KFC mashed potatoes, I think of powder mix. They might not prepare them that way, but I’m not even opposed. I have great nostalgia for KFC mashed potatoes. I expected these things to burst with a wet, goopy potato paste, but alas, mine were dry.

The poppers are served with a cup of gravy for dipping, and I’ll just say that gravy is trash. I had great memories of KFC gravy too, but this was just watery sewage runoff that absolutely did not enhance the poppers.

I’m willing to chalk my experience up to premature ordering, but I gotta score ‘em how I got ‘em. There’s no reason to ever get these over a fry or a wedge or even a side of mashed potatoes, but I still think you should try them on the off-chance I just got a bad batch.

I don’t think Mashed Potato Poppers are long for the menu, but I’d love to see the Colonel attempt some corn fritters in this style next.

Purchased Price: $3.00
Size: 5 Poppers
Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (5 Poppers w/o gravy) 200 calories, 10 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 921 milligrams of sodium, 39 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

I enjoyed KFC’s Nashville Hot Loaded Fries Bowl…without the chicken.

All right. All right. Let me back up a little bit. The chain’s newest thing with stuff dumped into a bowl features Secret Recipe Fries topped with coleslaw, pickles, cheese, Original Recipe Nuggets, and Nashville Hot Sauce, a Nashville Hot Mess, if you will.

However, I enjoyed the bowl more when my sporkfuls didn’t contain any of the C in KFC. I’ll get to that in a moment.

The Original Recipe Nuggets were just what I expected — meaty with a slightly crispy exterior and the flavor of the Colonel’s secret recipe of herbs and spices. The Nashville Hot Sauce gave the chicken a pleasant, sweet heat with a strong pepperiness that amped up the chicken’s flavor. Although not as coated in sauce as when Nashville Hot Chicken debuted at KFC, the nuggets were tasty.

(NOTE: The photos in the KFC app show an order is topped with five nuggets, but mine came with a bonus nugget. Yes, it happened again. )

But as much as I liked the chicken, and it tastes great with the other ingredients, after eating a sporkful without the poultry, my mind decided to push to the side whatever chicken nuggets were left and enjoy just the fries, cole slaw, pickles, and cheese mixed together. My tongue thought it was a more enjoyable and unique combination of flavors that the chicken’s meatiness got in the way of. I did consume them after.

I’ve never had cole slaw on any fries, and it sounds weird to bring the two together, but that combination, along with the seasoning on the fries, the cheese, pickles, and Nashville Hot sauce, works well and tastes delightful. I’m surprised how well the slaw and the sauce complement each other despite being kind of opposing ingredients. If you think about it, it’s sort of a vegetable salad with Nashville Hot dressing.

I imagine if Colonel Sanders found out about how I had pushed aside his Secret Recipe seasoned chicken, he would be rolling in his grave like a rotisserie chicken. Then he’d want to pull out my bones to flatten me like a spatchcocked chicken and then shove a Coors Light container in one of my orifices like a beer can chicken. But his Secret Recipe does play an important role in how much I enjoyed KFC’s Nashville Hot Loaded Fries Bowl, although it was on the fries and not the chicken.

Purchased Price: $7.00*
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 910 calories, 60 grams of fat, 11 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 80 milligrams of cholesterol, 2530 milligrams of sodium, 63 grams of carbohydrates, 8 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar (including 0 grams of added sugar), and 26 grams of protein.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.

The press release for these new KFC Original Recipe Tenders begins with: “The chicken wars began five years ago with the chicken sandwich, but that’s old news. Today, the chicken tenders battle begins as KFC introduces new Original Recipe Tenders.” Um, it appears someone forgot about the Fast Food Chicken Strips/Tenders Battle during the late 2010s that it also participated in?

I guess it’s difficult to remember since most of the strips/tenders ended up being replaced, limited time offerings that come back every other year, or discontinued, never to be fried up again.

But KFC has had chicken strips/tenders for years, and these new Original Recipe Tenders have a description that sounds like it could’ve been used for previous versions. They feature chicken breast strips double hand-breaded with the chain’s iconic secret blend of 11 herbs and spices and then fried to golden brown. I mean, what could be different from previous iterations? More secret spices? Single hand-breaded?

I ordered a three-piece meal deal that comes with Secret Recipe Fries and two dipping sauces. In the app, I picked the new zesty Comeback Sauce, but my order didn’t come with it. Instead, I was given the KFC Sauce. I went back to the counter to swap them but was told they had yet to receive their shipment. Aw, ship! So, I guess I must come back to try the Comeback Sauce.

The double hand-breaded chicken wasn’t as crunchy as Popeyes’ offering, but the poultry inside was meaty and juicy. The familiar flavor of KFC’s world famous blend of 11 herbs and spices is present in every sauceless bite, making these fine to eat sans sauce. Despite being double hand-breaded, I thought the breaded exterior appeared a bit thin in places when compared to Popeyes’ even-coated tenders.

While I didn’t receive the Comeback Sauce, I was glad I finally got to try the KFC Sauce. The tangy and sweet sauce is delicious, and I tried to scrape up every milliliter I could with the rest of the tenders and some of the Secret Recipe Fries.

KFC Original Recipe Tenders are good enough that I’m sure they’ll survive the fast food chicken wars.

Purchased Price: $7.99*
Size: 3-piece combo
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3 tenders) 510 calories, 18 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 90 milligrams of cholesterol, 1200 milligrams of sodium, 60 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 0 grams of sugar, and 33 grams of protein.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. The advertised price for the Tenders Box is $5.