QUICK REVIEW: Great Value Frosted Mystery Toaster Pastries

Great Value Frosted Mystery Toaster Pastries

What is it?

Walmart’s store brand Great Value brings some excitement to your morning by releasing a Frosted Mystery Flavored Toaster Pastry. It comes in a fun multicolored box complete with question marks and a magnifying glass. The pastries themselves have white frosting and crunchy white bits but most intriguing is its clear filling that doesn’t give off any clues to its real flavor.

How is it?

As mentioned above, the mystery aspect is well executed throughout both the product and packaging. So well done in that regard. These also had a nice doughy taste that was pleasantly surprising.

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However, if we go back to the mystery flavor aspect of it, it might’ve been taken a little too far as I can’t figure out for the life of me what it could be. I enjoyed eating them as the mixtures of textures between the crunchy bits, frosting, dough, and sticky filling were all very satisfying. The flavor, though? I HAVE NO FREAKING CLUE.

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I ate an entire box, dissected one to isolate the filling, and even asked friends for help, but all to no avail. They have a sweet, definitely fruity taste but not enough flavor to lead my taste buds to anything more specific. I couldn’t even narrow it down to some potentials.

Is there anything else I need to know?

The ingredients list does offer up a morsel of info in that white grape juice concentrate is one of the things listed. However, upon further thought, this is likely how they executed the clear filling because it also does say natural flavors too.

Since toaster pastries are meant to be, well, toasted, I thought this action would help me out and unearth its true flavor. Did it work? Absolutely not. I was still stumped eating the warmed-up concoction.

Conclusion:

This is a decent store brand Pop-Tart that’s kind of tasty and fun with its white/clear elements that beg you to investigate the mystery! However, anticipation and excitement soon leads to frustration as you realize the flavor isn’t nearly intense enough to guide you anywhere. What a bummer.

Purchased Price: $1.00
Size: 6-pack
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 390 calories, 9 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 250 milligrams of sodium, 74 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 40 grams of sugar and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Sparkling Ice Mystery Fruit Flavor Sparkling Water

Sparkling Ice Mystery Fruit Flavor

Flavor innovation is all the rage recently. From mystery Peeps and Oreo to the ever-popular public vote or creation like Lay’s and again Oreo.

Now enter Sparkling Ice’s new Mystery Fruit Flavor Sparkling Water. With so many of the recent mystery entries being food it’s nice to see a beverage brand decide to follow this trend.

This mystery sparkling water has a cloudy-white appearance as to not offer any hints to the correct flavor. A trick color would have been pretty fun, though, as it would play with your mind as you wonder about its true purpose.

Upon opening the bottle, you get an immediate whiff of just citrus. It definitely smells like it could be lemon-lime like (how lame would that be or absolutely genius depending on how you look at it) but it also does have a little something extra as if maybe another fruit is thrown in there. While executing the sniff test, I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

Before drinking I decided to examine the bottle for any clues to see if the mystery gods dropped any breadcrumbs for us. Look at the back, for example, the question mark graphic contains line art of different fruits.

Sparkling Ice Mystery Fruit Flavor 2

There’s a lemon or lime or orange, a strawberry, a blackberry or raspberry, some cherries and then one that looks to me like a tomato. Remember a tomato is a fruit, not a vegetable, so it totally counts! How clever!? However, I’m not holding my breath that’s the flavor.

The others are your most basic fruits. LAME. The ingredients list shows lemon juice and green tea extract but they are both trumped by natural flavors as an ingredient. So not much help there either.

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Taking my first sip I’m completely underwhelmed. It tastes like, umm, fruit? Again there are the citrusy undertones but it’s hard to pinpoint what else it actually is. I was initially thinking something kiwi but Sparkling Ice already has a kiwi strawberry flavor so it can’t be a recycled one.

Then it hit me.

What’s exotic and different but also kinda kiwi-like? A dragonfruit! As I kept drinking that’s all I thought of, and once I started thinking about it, that’s all I could taste. So that’s my guess.

Overall, it’s a nice tasting zero sugar sparkling water, but I was expecting something more captivating. Just be warned it definitely tastes diet-y as in you can make out the artificial sweeteners from a mile away, but nothing worse than a diet cola.

When the flavor is revealed, I hope it is something more trendy or out there like avocado toast. Just please don’t be lemon-lime coupled with generic fruit, unless it’s an official Sprite or Mist Twist partnership because we all know brand mashups are pretty hot right now. It would be neat and almost make up for the boring flavor.

Almost.

(Nutrition Facts – 8 fl. oz. – 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of sodium, 0 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $1.00
Size: 17 fl. oz. bottle
Purchased at: Giant
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Liquid mystery item for once. No color trickery. Pretty good citrus fruity beverage.
Cons: Packaging and ingredients offer no help. Tomatoes and avocados are in fact fruits. TBD for when the flavor is revealed and it’s a huge let down.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Mystery Oreo Cookies

Limited Edition Mystery Oreo Cookies

There are many mysteries that surround the Limited Edition Mystery Oreo Cookies that go beyond the unknown flavor of its creme.

For example, why does it come in a 15.25-ounce package instead of the 12.7 ounce one we now always see with limited edition varieties?

Also, why can Oreo offer $50,000 to one randomly selected grand prize winner and $10,000 to five first-place winners who guess the flavor, but have no money to give out to those of us who were freaked out about Peeps Oreo turning our poop a weird color?

The limited edition snack has chocolate wafers and a food dye-less creme, but the smell that comes out of the packaging is colorful, bright, and familiar. It smells like Fruity Pebbles, which is weird because why would Oreo again offer a fruity cereal flavor a year after Fruity Crisp Oreo. It’s not much of a mystery if it’s easy to guess for eaters.

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With the first several cookies, I only ate the creme and left behind a wake of discarded chocolate wafers. The mystery creme also tastes like Fruity Pebbles, and at times like Froot Loops. But as I licked, ate, and rubbed it over my tongue, an orange and milk flavor stood out. So it got me wondering whether it could be Orange Creamsicle-flavored, which would also be a little odd because there was a Creamsicle Oreo back in 2011. Either way, the mystery creme tastes like it’s been done before.

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While it saddens me that this Mystery Oreo could be a recycled flavor, I do enjoy the creme. But it’s hyper sweet and potent, so much so that it negates the chocolate wafer’s flavor whenever I eat a cookie whole. That’s surprising since a regular complaint I’ve had with several Oreo varieties is how the wafer dampens the creme’s flavor. For some, I imagine the creme will be way too sweet.

I loved Fruity Crisp Oreo, so it’s not surprising that I like these. I also love the idea of having a Mystery Oreo, so I hope there’s a new one every year. But, next year, please don’t have a mystery flavor that tastes like a previous Oreo, those lazy bastards.

Oh, one last mystery about these cookies.

Why is Limited Edition Mystery Oreo wearing white after Labor Day?

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.98
Size: 15.25 oz. package
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Tastes and smells like Fruity Pebbles. Mystery flavors. Available in a size larger than other limited edition flavors.
Cons: Tastes and smells like Fruity Crisp Oreo. Creme might be too sweet for some. Mystery flavor spoilers when you visit your favorite junk food sites. Wearing white after Labor Day.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Haribo Gold-Bears Mystery Flavors

Limited Edition Haribo Gold Bears Mystery Flavors

Wait.

Gummi bears have flavors?

Despite eating Olympic swimming pools of them over the decades, that’s news to me. I thought they were all one – “fruitish.” Perhaps because I shove them in my mouth by the handful, they meld into the same taste?

Hence I walked into Haribo’s Mystery Flavor Gold-Bears thinking, “Oh, they have specific flavors now – that’s new!”

My first impression of this product was: Where’s the beef?

This is a large bag but the bears only come up to the top of the clear window. Two-thirds of the bag is empty – not even filled with air, fercryinoutloud! It’s like the CD longbox of candy!

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Second impression: Have the gummi bear species reverse-evolved into smaller versions of themselves? I love miniatures, but I like to look a bear in the eye before I bite his head off, thank you very much.

Inside the bag, that familiar plasticy sweet smell and the greasy film that leaves bear trails on every surface.

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Spoiler alert: if you want to solve the mystery flavors mystery yourself, stop reading here and come back later!

Let’s start with the ones I’m sure about.

Blue = Blueberry. This was a no-brainer.

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The orange-yellow was definitely peach. No doubt about it.

These were also my two favorite flavors. They tasted like bright, punchy candy renditions of their namesake fruits.

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The remaining three I’m a bit tentative on.

The maroon I’m 70 percent sure is raspberry. 30 percent chance it’s pomegranate. While they had a pleasant berry-ish taste, I wasn’t excited about them. Perhaps the ease of identification boosted the enjoyment in the others?

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I originally thought the pink and bright yellow were strawberry and pineapple, but then discovered these are flavors are in the usual Haribo gummi bear mix, so they wouldn’t put them in this, would they?

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I scanned the package for hints. That fruit-filled question mark probably holds the answers to this profound conundrum.

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After consulting the cartoon bear oracle, and a second round of tasting, I’m leaning toward pink = watermelon and yellow = banana. These are pure guesses, however. I’m curious to hear what you all think since I couldn’t check my work on their website. The URL advertised on the package is currently password protected. Annoying.

The yellow bears were the most confounding flavor-wise and my least favorite of the group. If they really were banana, it’s a loose interpretation. Assuming my guess on the pink bear is correct, I prefer a heavier-handed take on watermelon. These were far weaker than my watermelon touchstone – Jolly Ranchers.

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Overall, the gummi bears retained their historic chewy fruity appeal and the mystery flavors added a new twist (especially for those of us who never knew there were intentional tastes involved in the first place). If you’re a gummi bear fan, these are worth a try!

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(Nutrition Facts – 13 bears – 100 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 23 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $1.89
Size: 4 oz. bag
Purchased at: Walgreens
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: I love a good mystery! Who killed the blue bear in the library with a rope?
Cons: 4 ounces of micro-bears in a 9 ounce bag. Least banana-y banana – if that is banana. Non-working website.

REVIEW: Peeps Mystery Flavors (2017)

Peeps Mystery Flavors (2017)

I remember stumbling upon last year’s Peeps Mystery Flavors and I was very much caught off guard.

Not one, not two, but three new flavors that I get to try and guess?! COUNT ME IN. I fell in love with the buttered popcorn one and so this makes me very excited to see what Peeps has in store this year. What would be the new buttered popcorn for me?

There are again three flavors to guess and while the packaging has stayed similar the Peeps are now speckled with bright color flakes. This adds a whole another layer of complexity as it ties the colors directly to the peeps giving you another reference point to lead you to the correct flavor or just throw you off completely.

First up is my favorite, Mystery Flavor #1 of 3.

On first whiff, there is a predominately maple kind of scent like straight maple syrup, perhaps even a hint of caramel as well. Biting into the Peeps, I love how the sugar and flakes on the outside mix together with the squishy marshmallow inside.

However, the flavor doesn’t get any stronger, which is disappointing. I still taste maple but then also think these could be coffee too, but definitely with some creaminess. I really enjoyed these but am completely stumped by the flavor. They could be waffles or pancakes or cappuccino or latte but what I keep coming back to is maple syrup.

Peeps Mystery Flavors (2017) 2

Next up is my least favorite, Mystery Flavor #2 of 3.

After opening it I got a serious blast of fruitiness, but not sure which one yet. Eating the Peeps, made me think instantly of orange. These had a lot of flavor and were sweet, but also tart. There may be another flavor in there but these tasted exactly like those orange fruit slice candies. It can’t be THAT simple, though, can it? Maybe these are blood orange or something. Plain old orange would be a serious missed opportunity.

Finally, Mystery Flavor #3 of 3.

Smelling these I got fruitiness again but distinctly a lemon-lime scent. Eating them, yep, lemon-lime was coming in very strong with sour notes, too. However, the flakes are yellow and green, which seems way too easy, unless that was on purpose to trick us? Brand mashups are all the rage recently, so maybe these are in fact sour Sprite flavored. Let’s go with that!

(Nutrition Facts – 5 chicks – 140 calories, 0 calories from fat, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 15 milligrams of sodium, 34 grams of carbohydrates, 32 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein..)

Purchased Price: $3.19 each
Size: 3 oz./10 chicks
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 7 out of 10 (#1 of 3)
Rating: 5 out of 10 (#2 of 3)
Rating: 6 out of 10 (#3 of 3)
Pros: The fun that mystery flavors bring. Colored flakes upping the confusion factor. Sugary outsides and marshmallow insides joining together in perfect harmony.
Cons: Two-thirds of the flavors seem to be fruit based. Not finding my buttered popcorn successor. The agony that will take place until the flavors are officially revealed.